Getting anti social

For me, it's an age/energy thing. When I was younger (and working full-time, and child-rearing) we used to throw parties (with dancing and jollity), have people over for meals, have family & friends to stay, have DS's friends round, etc. Now I'm older and retired, I just can't face that level of activity!

Since retiring we don't go 'out-out' (to use the phrase of the moment) like we used to. We're quite happy to pop to our local pub and bring home a take-away on our return, once a week.
I enjoy just 'being' in my home, working long hours I was hardly ever in it so its nice to relax and enjoy it now.
My husband was never one for staying out v late, I was the 'party animal' but really cba now; been there, done that!
So yes I'd described us a being selectively sociable too (love this phrase) we're in our early 60's.

It's the wrong season to be out and about or socialising anyway. I'm far more sociable on a warm summer day - so leave me be to 'hibernate' in January!

I'm sure you mean un sociable rather than anti sociable unless of course you are rampaging in the neighbourhood. I one what you mean though about entertaining at home. There has been a big move to meeting people outside of homes for meals etc nowadays basically following the habit from the USA. Instead of entertaining at home. Seems young people have parties still at home though these are drinks, snacks, music rather than meals. Perhaps you've caught the trend!

I don't have a social life these days - it started 11 years ago when my mum died and I became part time carer for my dad, as well as working full time and then after he died, it came down to lack of money! Bills that had been split 3 ways (dad, son and me) now had to split in half.
Most of the time I don't mind, - or didn't until I heard that my last local friend will be moving away from the village in the near future.

Me too. Starting to play the uke was one of the best things I ever did!

I can't do much entertaining these days as I'm very old and all my bones hurt. It's easier to go out for coffee/lunch just now and again. Mostly I'm better off alone.

Perhaps in the past you (subconsciously) felt you HAD to do the social rounds, dinner parties, seen and being seen, chumming up with people when you didn't feel like it or wanted to?

Now you've found your natural rhythm and decided "well, this is our life now - to hell with all the rest!"

Good on you.

My problem is that our lovely friends invite us over for meals so we need to reciprocate, even if Mr C is fairly anti-social, muttering darkly at all the extra work necessary.

When we host, we enjoy doing so; I think that it's just the thought of the prep that puts Mr C off. The phrase 'twisting arm' doesn't come into it! Much.

@MerylStreep

Let me get this straight.

You visited every country in Europe on your motor home?

Absolutely.

We have a very limited social life and it's got worse since OH retired as we no longer have the money to just go and do things like we used to.

I'm a much more naturally chatty and sociable person than OH is but even I find that once we've had dinner I really can't be bothered to think about going to see friends and I can't even remember the last time we had anyone over for dinner, it's been that long!

Even during the daytime we just walk the dog round the park a couple of times a day and if we bump into someone we know there it's great to chat to them but we don't go out of our way to meet up with anyone, so yes I guess we are now both pretty anti social

I find that I can't tolerate certain people the way I used to anymore, so avoid them. Gradually my circle of friends has diminished over the last few years and I don't miss them.

Nope, reckon I'm just as socially active as ever. However, by choice we have all moved from homes to commercial outlets. Equal fun and no hassle for anyone. I think, in our case, economy and babysitting was part of our reason for using homes originally.

Sharon your comment made me laugh, that's just how I feel.

I love cooking and we have always enjoyed entertaining at home but what has changed now we are older and many of our friends are retired is that we invite folk to lunch, especially Sunday lunch, rather than invite them for an evening meal.

i hate entertaining and still do ...if you cant be bothered .enjoy some ME TIME instead...you can always go to a restaurant to see family..

Yes, we have become less sociable and more inclined to stay at home.

One reason is the DH hasn't been in the best of health for the last couple of years. This has prevented us going out and meeting new people, but I wonder if we would have done so, if things had been different healthwise.

I'm more selective about who I spend time with these days. Most of the time I'd rather be with my ponies or working in the garden.

I think there's a difference between not entertaining at home (which I don't do much of now) and being unsociable -the latter is the slippery slope to loneliness.

There is so much to do and see and you just have to tolerate other people in the mix.

From what I read on GN there are many people who just CBA to do anything!

January us a hibernation month. Its cold, dark and miserable.
Bed and book with some leftover chocs is most definitely needed to recharge and ready for spring.
I'm happy in my own company and have lots of hobbies. I wouldn't worry too much, just enjoy a much needed rest. X

No - you are not unsociable; I do believe that as we get older we refine what makes us happy, what we want to spend our precious time on, and also don't feel the need to please and attend everything regardless of whether we feel we are likely to enjoy it. I like my own company, and am also quite happy to be at home every evening with OH. Parties are not to my liking as I dislike noise and can't hear over the music, and although my daughter teasingly refers to me as 'FOMO' - 'Fear of Missing Out' we both know that I am in truth 'JOMO' - 'Joy of..'

We used to have regular dinner parties over the years and be invited to other people's homes. Now we go out to eat fairly regularly (Sunday lunch is my favourite) usually treating our children and grandchildren. For over ten years we've met up with friends in the pub each Friday or we'll all go out for meal together. But my favourite things I love is being at home with DH and to snuggle up in front of the tv most evenings. My sister (69) was bereaved fairly recently and has found a new partner and they're out drinking and eating most evenings. I guess a new relationship is exciting, but I prefer my comfortable relaxed life.

Selectively sociable what a lovely word, must remember it.I hibernate too in the winter months here in Scandinavia, no need to ask why!
I dont like going out at night for obvious reasons,( cold, dark,ice and snow a lot of the time) I enjoy meeting up for lunch with lady friends, but we dont entertain much these days, Husband is 72 I am 78 and we feel it gets a bit much feeding people! Happy as we are, we will be coming out of hibernation in a few months.

I'm 70 and I'd love to entertain the old crowd but they're all dead or moved away. Also I am getting more reclusive and my favorite time of the day is the evening, watching TV with the husband and surfing the net of course.

But I am treasurer for two groups and expected at meetings...big effort for me anymore.