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Getting anti social

(68 Posts)
Cid24 Sun 12-Jan-20 14:32:34

I’ve found that as hubby and I get older , we are getting more and more anti social. We used to entertain a lot, hosting dinner parties regularly, having people round for drinks etc.
Now, we just can’t be bothered . I’m 63, hubby is 73.
Is this happening to any of you lovely people too?

Cid24 Sun 12-Jan-20 14:34:50

Having said that, I go out a lot in the evenings to my Uke groups, it’s more about entertaining at home where I’ve noticed a change.

ladymuck Sun 12-Jan-20 14:40:39

Perhaps you've just got bored seeing the same people all the time?
I always hated entertaining...struggling to keep a conversation going. Very glad I only have people in now when it suits me and not my husband.

Esther1 Sun 12-Jan-20 14:41:27

Yes - definitely. I don’t particularly like going out in the evenings either although socialise a lot during the day.

ginny Sun 12-Jan-20 15:08:46

Not anti social but selectively social.

sharon103 Sun 12-Jan-20 15:12:16

Yes, me to. I've got a cant be arsed attitude to quite a few things these days. I'm 65.

Happygirl79 Sun 12-Jan-20 15:12:20

Selectively social
Love it

lovebeigecardigans1955 Sun 12-Jan-20 15:24:31

I've found that I've actually got better as I've got older - 65 tomorrow. I've gained more confidence over the years, whereas I'd have run a mile before.

MerylStreep Sun 12-Jan-20 15:36:50

Oh no, not at 63. I was still the same at that age as I'd ever been. Big BBQs, parties, too any pub nights😱
I was over 63 when we decided to visit every country in Europe in the motohome home ( lots of partying then)
I have to say, though, now 73 I can't take so much 🙁

lucywinter Sun 12-Jan-20 16:06:21

I'm finding at 78, that I want to be on my own more and more. It's not a good thing. I can easily slide into depression, whereas when I'm with others people, mainly family, and we start talking and laughing, I feel so much better. I think it's something to fight against, this 'alone' thing.

Sara65 Sun 12-Jan-20 16:12:00

We definitely socialise a lot less, we used to be out all the time, and always had people here.

I think it’s a mixture of things, a lot of the people we used to socialise with, have for one reason or another moved away. I’m just too tired to make the effort, especially in winter months, and to be honest, we must have spent a lot of money on socialising, and I’m not sure I could justify that now.

GagaJo Sun 12-Jan-20 16:24:11

I'm younger and am definitely a lot less sociable than I was. Not that I was ever a party animal, but these days, I prefer my own company to that of others.

JenniferEccles Sun 12-Jan-20 16:32:36


Washerwoman Sun 12-Jan-20 16:36:34

Selectively sociable is a good way of putting it.In ours 60s and we definitely have a quieter social life but I'm happy with that.When we were newly married and our children were small we did far more -with other families,trade dinners related to DHs business etc.But I can't say I miss it.The friends we have are cherished and we instantly relax with them.So whilst there's still a couple of meals out a month,or we entertain at home with a simple supper,or Sunday lunch we don't feel the need to have a diary full of events.On top of our friends we often host our DCs,partners and children.Too much on and I get grumpy.I like time to relax,read or a spontaneous trip to the cinema.

JenniferEccles Sun 12-Jan-20 17:41:19

I meant to say unsociable not antisocial.

Cid24 Sun 12-Jan-20 17:41:59

Selectively sociable works for me!

Cid24 Sun 12-Jan-20 17:43:50

But I think being anti social is something to fight against however...

BlueSky Sun 12-Jan-20 18:15:35

I've got definitely unsociable! I've never been the life and soul but now even worse, I won't even try. DH instead still the same sociable outgoing person that he was when younger, even more so!

Hetty58 Sun 12-Jan-20 18:22:41

I've never liked hosting very much and always preferred to be a guest. Now, at 66, I've got far worse and would much rather go out - or just be alone at home. Luckily, my kids have a lot of parties now!

kircubbin2000 Sun 12-Jan-20 19:43:40

I missed a lunch today pretending I wasn't well. It went on till after 5 but unfortunately 2 friends called to see how I was and stayed till after 7. Then they invited me to an other lunch.
I just want tangryo read my book and lounge in old clothes.

sodapop Sun 12-Jan-20 20:25:59

We like our own company too, don't like going out much in the evening but we do enjoy having lunch out with friends. We all feel this is better than cooking, washing up etc at home.

52bright Mon 13-Jan-20 00:14:48

Dh and I are both 67. I used to be more social than him but he is more chatty and sociable than me these days. We do have an evening out for dinner once a month with 2 couples who have been very good friends for years. I've found as I get older I am sometimes reluctant to make the effort but always enjoy myself once we are there and I wouldn't want to lose such precious friends.
I must admit thought that this past year we seem to prefer going out during the day rather than the evening. I would never have considered an afternoon rather than evening visit to the cinema until the last couple of years. Don't really know why ...maybe in my head day time was for working not pleasure. These days we much prefer to go as early as possible and avoid coming home in the dark.

BradfordLass72 Mon 13-Jan-20 05:39:02

I don't think I have ever been a sociable person in the sense of enjoying parties or crowds of people but for most of my life I haven't had the option.

When you bring up 2 children and a sick husband, socialising is off the table.

Whe you are then alone with 2 growing boys and no money for a babysitter or nights out, socialising is off the table too.

However, I've ever really missed it. I can be sociable if thrown into a crowd but I much prefer to be by myself listening to TED talks and podcasts about science and history!!

My sister (a real good-time girl) once told me I was a fuddy-duddy - I was 22 at the time - and I agreed.
I still am, 50 years later.

Cid24 Mon 13-Jan-20 06:03:30

Yes of course, I mean unsociable ! As opposed to anti social 🤪

maryhoffman37 Mon 13-Jan-20 10:33:51

This week I have: a meeting in London (otherwise would be on a Nordic walk),exercise class on Wednesday, a friend in for coffee on Thursday, book club Thursday evening to discuss a book I loved, a trip to London with husband to see the Blake exhibition, trip to Eastbourne to visit my sister and going to a friend's for lunch on Sunday. It's not exactly entertaining but very full socially. I think I am getting MORE social with age as another GNetter said above. In fact sometimes I feel I don't have enough time for my work.