So should I lie!

I do like your throw the question back at them as to why they have chosen to have children. eazybee. It works both ways.

I’m going a bit off here. My mum who had four children would often refer to someone (unkindly) with one child, “She’s like a hen with one chick”. She didn’t have an answer when I said to her one day, “Like me then!”

I am amazed by the rudeness of people asking such a personal question.

Can you simply say that you don't want to talk about that?
Say it with a smile and refuse to be bullied into a direct response.

On the other foot - I might ask someone if they have children (I wouldn't routinely but I might). If they say 'no' and don't elaborate, then I smile and move on. But I find it easier if they say 'no, it just never seemed right' or 'it just wasn't to be' or even 'I have nieces / nephews who take a lot of my time'.
Of course it is no-one else's 'business' but in social situations it can be a reasonable question arising in conversation. Simply asking doesn't imply (IMHO) any expectation around the answer.

I am surprised that people would think that it's ok to as that question. I have a close friend who I knew for several years before she mentioned the reason for not having children. I would not lie, tell them whatever you feel comfortable with.

No don't lie just be non committal. Answering a question with a question can often make people back track. So when people ask if you have children say why do you ask, their response could be along the lines of: I am interested/curious. Respond by saying thank you for your interest/curiosity. Or ask them why they have children which may take them aback and think about how inappropriate their question was to you in the first place.

How rude, I would respond by saying "I didn't choose to, why did you ?".

My children say the same thing Kitty also accompanied by an eye roll.

Almost all my closest friends are childless, I have never ever asked any of them why they are childless.

DD is resolutely single and childless and decided before she started school that she didn't want to be a mummy. She just decided it wasn't for her - and I have never challenged her thinking on this.

When I was asked why I didn't have children I too would always say, oh I haven't a maternal bone in my body! And when I was accompanied by whoever I was in a relationship with at the time, I would say, well he's enough to be looking after thank you.
But not many people have asked that question.
I was often tempted, although never did, ask someone 'why do you have children?' Just as pertinent I would have thought.

I would just reply with, "it is not something I discuss." You shouldn't have to lie.

My good friend of 10 years has no children. I have never asked her why, as it is none of my business.

I think it is very rude to ask such personal questions and it always surprises me how often people do this.
If I don't want to discuss something personal, I say "it's a long story" and change the subject.

The other side of the coin is when I am asked why we have 5 children. My answer was 'It took us a while to find out what causes them!'

A childless colleague was asked that question a lot. She said it sounded like people thought she was odd/strange/weird to be married with no children. She'd never wanted any - but told people it 'just never happened'.

I’ve got four children, Kittylester and I use the ‘We didn’t find out what was causing them until I had No 4,’ line.

Oldwoman70.
perhaps you could reply with the question
Why do you ask? That usually stops them in their tracks. ?

My DD just says she doesn’t want them! That usually ends the conversation.
These days it is quite common not to want children.

I'd probably just say "I don't know" and change the subject. You could add in a "children are lovely though" so they don't come to random conclusions x

Once when I was a very young mother I met an old school friend whom I hadn't seen since school days. In the course of catching up she asked had I any children. Then I asked her. She said no and I asked why. She looked very uncomfortable and said she couldn't. I felt soawful. I have never asked that question since. I think it's a question you really should not ask. I would just ignore it and if pushed just say I think that's private/my business.

Someone suggested saying something like "why have you got children?" which sounds like a good idea.

I do not ask people if they have children.

If I mention my own children, people either start talking about their own children too or they do not. I take my lead from them.

Two of my friends who do not have children quite freely tell people the reasons why - in one case, unable to have them and, in the other, did not wish to have children.

I suspect that, sometimes, people are trying clumsily to make conversation when they ask that question which is no excuse but it may be the reason.

I cant understand how people can be so rude. If someone asked why my reply would be that's my business don't you think?
I on the other hand have 8 children a mixture of birth and adopted. People would say to me 'oh you must love children'. My reply was 'No I don't, but I love MY children'

I too would answer with , ‘Why do you ask?’ It’s such a rude question.

Many years ago I used to be asked ‘what does your husband do?’ If I went anywhere unaccompanied , I used to reply with ‘ why? Do you know him?’
That usually shut them up.

No don`t lie and it`s damn rude to ask why anyway nosey gitbags.

Not quite the same, but once at a job interview I was asked about children . I forget the exact question, but I turned to the representative from the local authority and said: I think that is an unacceptable question.
A bit formal perhaps for an informal conversation, but it is true. It is unacceptable to ask someone why they don’t have children. They don’t deserve an answer.
I met a new lady at choir practice last week who has just moved into the area, so I asked her if she had any family here. There are ways to get to know people without embarrassing them

One of my sisters choose no kids , people think it's ok to ask why. She has the look you know the one that scares you to death,

Yes, it’s interesting to realise that when people are asked if they have children, there is not usually a follow up question asking why they have had children.