My sister Margot, the labrador and the cake.

I used to teach Sugarcraft so when it was time for a family birthdays I had to do something Pretty spectacular!
For my Dad's 60th I created a free standing Grandfather clock (his hobby was clock repairing) & I was very pleased with it.
The following day -which was the day of his surprise party - I popped out to buy some bits & when I came home all that was left of the cake was the board! Our retriever had eaten the lot & he didn't even have the grace to be sick!
Needless to say- I am a woman!!- I set to & made another one. Not nearly as good as the first & a bit of a bodge job but it was a cake & it did look like a Grandfather clock- mostly!
Luckily I had taken a photo of the first one & I had another board.
Not just Labradors- retrievers are as bad. He once managed to get EVERY After Eights of of the box one Christmas & eat them leaving ALL the wrappers in the box.
Now I just have cats!!

Making sandwiches, had buttered the bread, added cheese and cucumber, and turned to the fridge to get the tomatoes. I must have been seconds, and just a few feet away, and when I turned back they were gone. I stood staring stupidly at the worktop, completely unable to think what had happened, and then looked at the dog's basket in the corner. Our elderly mongrel was sitting happily licking her lips, with cucumber around her. She had snuck up, siezed her chance, stolen them and swallowed them within seconds, discarding cucumber (which she wasn't keen on. ) Had I not seen the cucumber I would have thought I was going mad - this was a feat so speedy and slick that I almost wanted to give her a medal.

Aww that did make me smile,. Nice to have something to laugh at especially just now, ..
Anyone in the UK seen the funny item the have played on This Morning program Tv played it twice this week,..I will try and put the link on here, may not work ...? Enjoy if it does
The poor lady talking totally lost it
Stay safe x

youtu.be/crBKZIY-8Co

I remember, quite a few years ago, when it was a really harsh winter reading about a recipe for a cake, full of seeds and healthy stuff, that you could put out for the birds. So, I went out and bought all the special ingredients and made this cake. The instructions were to put it outside whilst it was warm, and that the birds would smell it and come down and eat it. Not one bird came near my garden table. I've never been the world's best cake maker I have to admit, but was a bit insulted the birds spurned my efforts. A few days later, I fed the so called bird cake to some ducks in a local park - they loved it!!

Years ago, a friend bought her first house, which was in the middle of a crescent. She walked round,introducing herself to all her new neighbours - nice friendly people.She had a cat which she kept indoors for the first week, as her vet suggested.
The first day she let the cat out was a Sunday, a hot summers day, everyone had their windows and doors open.
Cat went out to return trying to pull a huge roast chicken through the catflap, chicken still hot.
She never found out who had 'lost' their Sunday dinner

I was giggling just reading the thread title!!

I made the mistake of leaving our dog in the lounge/diner with the newly delivered pizzas on the dining table.

The empty boxes were on the table when I returned from collecting my son from work, and a dog with a guilty expression was looking at me from her crate.

What WAS I thinking of, leaving her in the room. My own fault for leaving that degree of temptation in her way

Thats why i always turn auto off Lizzypopbottle ? oh,youve all proper cheered me up today my friends?? My cat just licks his lips at me when he wants feeding- in fact,he cant look at me without licking them anymore,as if in hope he'l get fed every single time! When i tell him he cant,he just winks one eye at me,or gives me a few mews as he always likes to get the last word in.?

In our last house one day, a far from grunted nieghbour arrived and thrust a platter at us. It contained the carcass of a large baked salmon garnished with cucumber. 'You might as well have this,' she said, 'Your cat's had the rest of it!! '
We haven't stayed in touch.

Not just dogs. I served up dinner once and my elder daughter, a teenager then, was messing about upstairs instead of coming down when called. The cat jumped on her chair and started licking the gravy off her plate. She then came down and ate her dinner and we didn't tell her for years, it was an 'in joke' for me and her sister.

Oh Jane10 that's really made me laugh!

I have enjoyed the cat tales on here! Our cat used to regularly pop next door to the neighbours house and see what was going. He once pinched a nice steak from the kitchen worktop our neighbour had left for a few minutes lying out!

During cookery classes at school, the girl at the worktable behind (C) kept talking to me and another girl ( J)to the side of us during every lesson, she never listened to the teachers instuctions, so constantly asked us what she had to do or add to the recipe, one day myself and the girl beside me were really fed up being interrupted and when C asked how much salt she had to add, we told her it was a dessert spoonful instead of half a teaspoonful.
Later that day she offered us a piece of the dish she had made, we had forgotten about what we had told her to do and gladly took a piece, oh it tasted awful and we had our cummppance

My mum made rock buns once, my dad always joked they were so hard even the seagull weren't able to eat them. My mum was a really good baker.

Our Manchester terrier (aka a mongrel) once ate 500g puff pastry which was thawing on a worktop). We assumed that he would become very ill but there were no I'll effects whatever!

Oh and he purloined a large box of chocolates too.

Strong stomachs, dogs!

Reading about all the dogs here eating fruit cakes and mince pies, and apparently coming to no harm it seems the rule that dried fruit us poisonous to dogs must be wrong.

Anyway, here's my story if a very greedy basset hound that I owned in the 70s
I couldn't leave anything on the countertop because she'd have it. I've come in to find my feet sticking to the kitchen floor and a sick looking dog still throwing up frothy sugar and the remains if the bag. Over time she's scoffed a block of cheese, a bag of flour, all the chocolate decorations from the Christmas tree, leaving the foil wrappers still attached to the tree but her best one ever was taking a half cooked chicken from the oven whilst we were out in the garden thinking she was with us. We came in to a very greasy kitchen floor and a very fat looking guilty dog.
She never came to any harm either.

One Christmas I made a very large cake, left on dining room table wiring to marzipan that evening and went to work, I forgot to shut the dining room door. On return I found a very friendly border collie waiting for me and a big chunk of cake missing. Dog was fine. I got a saucer, put on cake, cut round it and made a snow scene will ski slope. It was years later I told anyone.

My Mum told me this story. On Christmas Day her friend left the turkey on the kitchen side to finish defrosting. She went outside to the bins and then saw the cat dragging the turkey down the garden. She ran after it and managed to retrieve it but the cat had run off with one of the legs.
She cleaned the turkey and cooked it as normal but her husband was curious as to why the turkey only had one leg. She didn't want to tell him the cat had run off with it as he would have refused to eat it so she said that the butcher had told her it was a disabled turkey and she could have it at a reduced price. That satisfied her husband, Christmas dinner continued as normal and it was years later before she told him the truth!

"disabled turkey" - this thread is pure gold

Long ago, a new couple arrived on our school compound in Kenya and I invited them for afternoon tea. My sleek grey cat arrived to make their acquaintance and the young man did a double take: 'Oh that's your cat! He's the one I saw disappearing through the window with my fish!' He had laid out a whole fish to thaw. Well, he wouldn't do that again, not with my Stevenson around. And no, that mean cat hadn't shared it with me, though his partner in crime, Orlando, might have had a paw in the matter.

Oh you put a big smile on my face..!! Great story!!!

One Sunday afternoon our cat was struggling up the garden with something heavy. On closer inspection we found it to be half a roast beef joint. One of my unfortunate neighbours had obviously left it on a windowsill to cool after their dinner!

My cat came home one day with a pork chop!

Must have been horrid for even a Labrador to not want it! Maybe in hundreds of years time somebody will dig it up and write a study on what we ate in 2020!

I once owned a Lurcher (renowned thieves) who ate a very large amount of Quality Street. We didn’t know until my young daughter said ‘Toby has done shiny poos”.

I once made a salmon mousse when 2 couples were coming for dinner. It was a major faff to make, and I’d decorated it with slices of lemon and cucumber.

I put it on the table and went to call everyone to come. Just before they did, our dog had got up on a chair and very delicately slurped a tongue-ful out of the side!

Thank goodness friends just found it hilarious - I cut that bit out and we ate the rest.

Our daughter’s dog has never taken food from the table. However on the occasion of a birthday I had made a Malteser cake and it was on dining room table. Sudden moment of wondering where the dog was - he was looking at this cake with mouth open ready to take a bite. He would have been very poorly had he succeeded due to the high level of chocolate - a lucky escape all round.