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I tried, I really did......

(400 Posts)
phoenix Sat 28-Mar-20 15:19:11

Hello all, extra good wishes to you all.

Well, the newspaper (only once a week) needed to be collected from the village shop, so Mr P asked what else we needed. There were things that he had been unable to get from his supermarket trip, so I jotted them down, in clear, large print, giving additional verbal instructions suggestions.

(The village shop now has a "non browsing" policy, and have set up a counter in the doorway. Shoppers are encouraged to arrive with a written list, which they give to the staff member.)

His first attempt was aborted, he was shock to see the queue stretching 200 metres back down to the village square!

He came home, but said he would go back in an hour or so.

So, we had a light lunch (cheese on toast) and off he went.

I was planning to make creamed cabbage to go with the chicken hot pot for Sunday, so my list included a small green cabbage, and some cream.

I had actually said to himself "Don't get a white cabbage, it won't work, and if they don't have green cabbage, we won't need the cream, and we can just use the extra broccoli that you bought that we didn't need yesterday. He looked at me and nodded, as if to say "Roger! Willco!" and off he went.

The bit regarding "If no lettuce, get mushrooms, we will have to have steak, chips & mushrooms instead of our usual steak, salad & jp's" (Not as healthy, but needs must wink) seemed to have been taken on board.

However I'm now the less than proud owner of a very large white cabbage, and a large pot of cream confused.

I will list the white cabbage on the village FB page, there must be someone with a large family who can use it! (Can be left in a bag on our doorstep for collection) and I suppose I could make creamed broccoli!

Before anyone castigates me (big word for a Saturday) I really do appreciate the fact that Mr P does get the shopping, this post is meant to be a bit of lighthearted stuff!

SirChenjin Sun 29-Mar-20 16:53:50

Sacre bleu! Vous ne sais rien?? Forfend cela signifie que le ciel s'il vous plaît l'arrêter de parler - obvs

SueDonim Sun 29-Mar-20 17:03:42

Ooh, your back, Phoenix! How much was your bail money set at? grin

SueDonim Sun 29-Mar-20 17:04:23

You’re back. hmm

Lisagran Sun 29-Mar-20 17:09:20

An easy mistake for a woman to make SueDonim grin

Katek Sun 29-Mar-20 17:14:19

Oops minimoon! Teach me to read whole thread! Love Jeanne Robertson.

phoenix Sun 29-Mar-20 17:21:42

Yes, SueDonim I'm out of the slammer!

Bail amounts are a bit erm, shall we say "flexible" at present, as they are trying to work out the exchange rate.

It seems to depend on supply and demand of various commodities, gin, wine, chocolate, etc.

Although of course there is the vegetable market, currently no one knows how many onions there are to the carrot!

SueDonim Sun 29-Mar-20 17:26:33

I hear cabbages are much in demand right now, Phoenix. Maybe someone is playing a game of Crackerjack?

Lisagran grin

Greymar Sun 29-Mar-20 17:31:23

Ah bien sur,je fais le faux pas et ce nest pas le premier fois.

SirChenjin Sun 29-Mar-20 17:46:23

It was on the FTSE earlier that there are 3 carrots, 4 onions, 1 bottle of gin and a green (NOT white) cabbage to the loo roll.

I am loaded now with my 28 bog rolls ???

SueDonim Sun 29-Mar-20 18:00:50

I still have my Brexit stash of loo rolls and for some reason Dh put a pack of twelve into the wardrobe a while ago, so it looks as though I’m minted now as well. grin

Gemini17892 Sun 29-Mar-20 18:48:37

Swap you a small tin of peas for one of your bog rolls , Sue D !

phoenix Sun 29-Mar-20 18:54:19

Any one got any kidney beans?

We're ok for toilet rolls, and have managed to source some cat litter (don't ask)

phoenix Sun 29-Mar-20 18:57:30

SueDonim you don't think that your DH might be planning to self isolate in the wardrobe, hence the toilet rolls?

Have a quick look, and if he has also stashed a bucket, then be afraid, be very afraid.......

Greymar Sun 29-Mar-20 18:58:14

Got 2 jars of butter beans, not just any butter beans, collected and lovingly hand picked and tarted up in jars.

Swap for a packet of hobnobs.

grannyrebel7 Sun 29-Mar-20 19:05:03

Love the sound of cream cabbage! In my experience you can't give men complicated instructions , it's doomed to fail if you do! Just keep it simple.

phoenix Sun 29-Mar-20 19:13:30

Oh grannyrebel7 ! You're brave! "What's that coming over the hill?, Is it a flapjack (Archers reference) " No, it's Grandad1943!

Any minute now "he who should not be named" will appear with his usual women putting down men stuff, "yawn".

It would seem that quite a few GN members are less than enamoured.........

Trisha57 Sun 29-Mar-20 19:25:58

I've just read this whole thread, and it's really brightened up my day (is "brightened" a proper word?) Thank you all, even Grandad1943, for making me chuckle!!!

Trisha57 Sun 29-Mar-20 19:28:04

Oh no! Will he come after me now and accuse me of laughing at him behind his back? shock

Marydoll Sun 29-Mar-20 19:35:11

I suspect that Grandad, has enjoyed it as much as the rest of us.
?

GrannyLaine Sun 29-Mar-20 19:36:08

I have kidney beans and hot cross buns that are worth the equivalent of some dried yeast that's still in date. My trading reserve is a warm sourdough loaf for whichI have my eye on those exotic butterbeans Greymar But sadly no Hobnobs...

Marydoll Sun 29-Mar-20 19:40:55

I have sultana and cherry scones and I'm offering them in exchange for a green or white cabbage. ?

Grandad1943 Sun 29-Mar-20 19:44:52

Trisha57, in regard to your above posts, I am pleased that you have enjoyed the thread

As I have stated in a couple of PMs I have received from forum members stating similar to yourself, at least part of my ambition in this thread was to take peoples minds off all that is taking place, and in that, out of themselves.

If those of us most prominent in this thread have succeeded in the above then it has all been worthwhile.

Again, I am pleased you and others have enjoyed it so much.

But to think, it all started over a cabbage. ?

Marydoll Sun 29-Mar-20 19:48:54

?

TerriBull Sun 29-Mar-20 19:54:38

Never underestimate the power of the cabbage!

Lewis Carroll knew that when he wrote :

"Lets talk of many things, of cabbages and kings"

That wonderful line resonates to this day.

Awesome!

Curlywhirly Sun 29-Mar-20 19:54:59

Well, I don't wish to brag and make you all jealous, but I have a pack of 24 toilet rolls, bought might I say, about 4 weeks ago, well before the recent shortages. So, I am open to offers, but, as I can't find any flour at all in our supermarkets, have to say Marydolls sultana and cherry scones sound lovely - however, if they are homemade, hope they turned out better than the failed baps/rock cakes. If not, then GrannyLaine's warm sourdough loaf (a particular favourite of mine) sounds very good.