Might this be allowed?

As long as you take everything that’s been said into consideration and want to go then I think you should go. There are times when we need the comfort of our close family for our emotional and mental wellbeing. This being one of them. You’ve had such an awful tough time of it.

I’ve done just that and am staying with my daughter and her children. It makes it so much easier to stick to the routine and lovely to have company.

Just go for it.

I'm in the 'just go for it' camp too

Weighing up the pros and cons and knowing what a difficult time you have had recently, I would go Luckygirl. You can self isolate for the first week as others have said. Given your family's life style it doesn't seem as if the risk would be great anyway.
Go and join your family and don't worry about it. Stay safe all of you.

Me too.

Only you will know what’s right I have a daughter shopping for me but she doesn’t come near me leaves the shopping on the doorstep and backs off down to the pavement
I guess the weak link is the son in law continuing his shopping trips but then you must weigh up if your mental health and comfort is worth the slight risk and he can take precautions when he gets home from shopping washing/showering changing clothes etc

Just go and do not agonise about it.

Given your recent tragic loss, no-one would say you should do anything else.

With any rules you need to know when to ignore and flex them and this is one of those situations where you flex them.

Personally, I would rather be in my own home, but you've had a tough time Lucky and only you can make the decision. Go with your gut. Xx

I'd go. You have a very close family and it would save them worrying about you. You can always come home to self-isolate if one of them gets 'it'.

No.
Do you want to go? Sure
Is it safe to go? No

Son in law is a weak link and your dd's family has NOT being in isolation.

We are ALL at risk, no matter what age we are, preexisting conditions, etc.

How many more threads are going to be open with these "might" scenarios?
I swear it is worse than dealing with little kids.
Little children still listen to their parents and follow directions better than some posters here

Nfkdumpling

If anybody in OP's DD'S household gets coronavirus, likely OP got it too AND SHE CANNOT GO BACK TO HER OWN HOME.

What is so hard to understand?

Hithere - I hear you, believe me. I too get frustrated when people do not take this seriously.

But I am also clear that the risk would be all mine, rather than anyone else's. I would not risk spreading anything to anyone as I have been in isolation for 3 weeks and am symptom free.

The risks to me are twofold - both physical and mental.

Under no circumstances would I do anything that might put my family or anyone else at all at risk. I have a history of a serious depression that put my life at risk; and this current situation risks re-awakening that scenario, in which case I would need help and treatment that would involve me mixing with professionals for care.

It is about balancing risk.

You may rest assured that I would not do anything irresponsible. I take all this with the utmost seriousness. It was a scenario that my OH (a doctor) had predicted for a long time.

I think your post is unnecessarily harsh Hithere. Risks always have to be weighed up against benefits and there is NO absolute safety. Luckygirl has clearly weighed up all the pros and cons

I swear it is worse than dealing with little kids
How is that in any way helpful?

I think if you want to you should go. You are intelligent people weighing up the risks.
If it will make you all happier, go!

I agree with GagaJo (actually this is becoming the new norm for us haha! ?)

Luckygirl YOU are the most vulnerable person here. The smalls and the adult children are more likely the spreaders to YOU. Your medical history bears this out.

If your son in law would agree to a period of household quarantine before you join them, I think you would then all be safe together.

Best wishes. x

In your position I would go, I cannot see a safety issue and if you find it does not work out you can always return home.

There is a family in my road, two separate houses that have combined for the duration.

I've recently lost a loved one (on the 11/3) and have been under pressure from family members to go and stay with them. Grieving in isolation is tough. There's nobody to hug or to cheer you up.

Still, here I can entirely please myself about everything - when I get dressed, eat, walk the dog, play music, nap, watch a film etc. with nobody else to consider.

I've decided that staying with others would just be too stressful for me. They want me there so that they don't have to worry about me, understandably - but I'd really hate it!

You will be at increased risk because you will be living with someone who goes out into the community.

How much of an increase? The truth is nobody knows. If your SIL went shopping yesterday he could be incubating it today so saying they haven’t shown any symptoms so far doesn’t really mean anything.

You will, if that risk proves a mistake, probably need nursing care because if your health, so your decision, though a drop in the ocean, will have consequences for others.

If having thought about both those things you still decide it’s best to go, then that’s the right decision for you.

My daughter is isolating for me. She and my grandson are lower risk. I'm not at HUGE risk because I'm mid 50's but do have low level asthma. Consequently, she doesn't EVER go out grocery shopping because she could carry it back in with her.

I'm not seeing my partner because he isn't isolating. So I came back to the UK (working overseas) and haven't seen him at all since I got back because he won't isolate. Ironically, he is at greater risk than me (70, smoker). I was upset when I first realised I wouldn't be able to see him, but it was the right decision.

It's a tricky one but Eglantine is right. Every time somebody leaves the house you have to re-set the clock.

It's a risk a family have to take when they have no choice so I can see why you are uncertain about which path to take, Luckygirl

I said this is worse than dealing with children because it is.

Scenario:

Mother says no candy before dinner - aka stay at home only essential travel
Note: op going to her dd is NOT essential travel. OP and dd can videochat, call each other, etc., in order to deal with loneliness

Child: but the candy is strawberry flavoured! My favourite! - aka I know the rule but I still want go to to my dd/supermarket/on vacation/etc. I dont care about the rules!

It is worse because a child understands the rule.
An adult that sees a rule imposed for the wellbeing of the whole society and yet they try to rationalize they are the exception is plain selfish and inconsiderate of others.

I would be packing my bags as we speak Luckygirl your well being is very important to your daughter, she is a caring daughter who wants to look after you in these dreadful times, they are doing all the right things re virus, please say thanks very much and move in, and enjoy the love and support and lovely surroundings.

At least you get to spend time with the gorgeous boy GagaJo I know how much you adore your grandson.
?

Such a thoughtful daughter too, helping to facilitate your inclusion into family life.

What a lot of agonizing! Of course go, you don't need permission use common sense.

kircubbin2000, Luckygirl knows that it's against the rules and the rules are there to keep everyone as safe as possible.

She has to decide whether she can tolerate the isolation. If not, there's the increased physical risk to health.

Whether she'd be happier fitting in with family or doing her own thing is another consideration.

Ultimately, can take the risk of somebody becoming ill because of her choice? It's a tricky decision.