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Don’t want to be offended ... but I am!

(134 Posts)
NanNanCake Mon 06-Apr-20 18:12:55

Ok I know my neighbour was being kind, ok I know when you’re in your 30s being in your (very early !!)50s is old - And I don’t want to be offended by them putting a note through my door that if I needed help walking my dog or with food shopping during the corona virus they were here and willing to help - but hey I am !
Am I officially old ?? Sorry I know I should be more generous just wasn’t ready to think of myself as needing that sort of help yet

Susiewakie Tue 07-Apr-20 21:00:11

My poor mum is 85 lives 2 hour drive from me .Her neighbour normally gives her a lift once a week to get heavy shopping but is now going alone no offer to fetch her anything ! So disappointed so mum is going up and down getting a few things im worried sick ! Will have to come out of isolation Friday and get shopping and take it to her 😡

Herbie9 Tue 07-Apr-20 21:11:33

I'm lucky my son who lives fairly near does a weekly shop for me and my local pharmacy has always delivered my medication. I also have a very good neighbour who puts my bins out and has offered to do shopping if needed. I was surprised when two other neighbours who I don't know - our road is quite long - also offered to help out. I told them I was very grateful for their kind thoughts but would certainly get in touch if needed. The kindness of strangers has always amazed me.

jenpax Tue 07-Apr-20 21:35:31

I get why you feel that way although I do agree it was clearly meant kindly.
When Asda started their early shop slot for the vulnerable and pensioners I went along, I am in the vulnerable group (no spleen) and daughter with whom I am in lockdown is a type 1 Diabetic so although we really should be getting online shops we couldn’t get a slot so off I went, the staff stopped some people at the door and told them they couldn’t go in yet as they didn’t meet the criteria however they didn’t even question me and I am in my 50’s😱 I couldn’t help wondering if it was because I might look years older than I actually am 🤦🏼‍♀️

Jillybird Wed 08-Apr-20 00:16:59

My partner is 72. He was offended when a fifty year old neighbour knocked to ask if we needed anything. He said, "What's he trying to say?" I said, "Did you think you didn't look 70?"

jocork Wed 08-Apr-20 00:18:14

I'm the neighbourhood watch coordinator for my road so I have emailed the group to offer to help anyone needing anything. However I had to self isolate at the beginning as I had a cough so I also emailed to ask if someone could get me some milk, which one kind neighbour did. We're all working from home but one colleague contacted me offering to shop for me if I needed it - she knows I'm vulnerable and is somewhat younger than me. I've realised through all this that we all need to support each other. We also need to swallow our pride and ask for help if we need it. I doubt any of my neighbours will take up the offer of help but I've made it and my next door neighbours have checked that I am ok when we were out clapping last week. I'm certainly not offended when someone offers help. It just makes me feel safer and cared for as my family live hundreds of miles away. A lot of my friends are checking on me too as they know I live alone and I'm checking on people in a similar situation.

talula Wed 08-Apr-20 08:09:44

I hate to say this but you sound ungrateful to me. I have a very kind neighbour also and although I don't need her help I am very grateful for her offer of help. I belong to a support group and would hate to think that I had upset anyone by asking if they needed help.

Bobdoesit Wed 08-Apr-20 12:03:41

Don't knock it NanNanCake you are the lucky one. smile

Greengage Wed 08-Apr-20 16:49:31

Our Neighbourhood Watch coordinator has set up a WhatApp group in our road. Those not on the internet are checked on by friends and neighbours. It seems to be working well, and a good community atmosphere is building up because of it. You join the group only if you want to. The invitation went out to all.