Have I just lost a friend?

Crimpedhalo’ I don’t understand why you are so angry with your friend who is in the nhs and drove to take her dog for a peaceful walk at 7am? What’s wrong with that? Am I missing something? Was she endangering anyone? Wasn’t she looking after herself and dog, very well? Which is what we should all do? So we have enough strength to look after others?
As for the OP wasn’t your friend just wanting you to agree with her on an ‘ain’t it awful level’ and then you both agree that it has to be done? Just having a safe private rant? I’m sure she wasn’t asking for your authority to do or not do.
It’s very likely that we will be told soon that lockdown must end because it is bad for business. I would prefer it to carry on but this might happen. They would say that the danger of the nhs being overwhelmed is over and we will have to return to some kind of normalcy. Things will never be the same though. We will all have to look after ourselves and each other the best we can.

notanan2 - you seem to have some very strange ideas sometimes.
Not that strange since increasing numbers agree both here and around the world.

We all need to do our part in trying to prevent it spreading more and killing more.
Lockdowns do not actually achieve that. They may possibly cause more deaths not less.

She sounds very stubborn and selfish and I can imagine many people may feel like this fustrated that they can't do the most simplest things that they did before.

But this is an invisible war; yes I'm repeating my self and we all have our part to play.

Someone put up about how intrusive the news is going into wards filming the sick but this is exactly the person that needs to sit and watch it. This isn't about one selfish person or any selfish person this is about being totally responsible, patient and playing your own part whether that's isolating, shielding, working from home or being a keyworker. Stickler for rules.

P.s I'm sure you will be friends again she just wanted you to agree with her. Keep being you. Take Care

WTH? She sounds like a six year old "i cant go out & have an icecream!" What a horrible selfish person she sounds- i wouldnt bother about a friend like that ExD,she,and others like her, are the ones keeping it going,and keeping it killing! Ive heard this week of most of a neighbourhood (not mine) who have started going in & out of each others houses,mingling-having stayed in for about five minutes- and heard of someone i know (dont live near me thank God)who was still visiting people at first despite having a hubby waiting for a kidney transplant! I fear we will all end up succumbing to the virus if these idiots carry on as they are.

Sounds like your friend is a weak person. She hasn’t been able to deal with the limitations and wanted your “permission” to break them by your agreeing with her. I wouldn’t fret. She’ll come around.

re the 20K hospital deaths from covid, he pointed out that in nearly 6 yrs of the second world war, this country lost 60K civilians.
makes you think doesn't it.

Yes, yes, it certainly does - and they estimate the true total deaths could be nearer 40k in these few months - including all those in the community not in the figures.

We are all finding this lockdown hard and frustrating but the majority of us why we are doing this so no you arent being silly.
When she has thought about what she has said she will no doubt call you and apologise...if not then you can always get in touch and say you understand her rant but remind her that she needs to do this for her GC
Whatever your husband is doing hope he stays safe and well tio

I think you were absolutely right - she is being stupid and selfish.

Your friend is making a HUGE assumption she can get on and catch it and then be immune ! Sadly it maybe isn’t the case and that will complicate things until there is a vaccine ! As Angela Merkel said we don’t want to exhaust ourselves we have to stay calm and understand it might take a while to get through this

The person I'm getting frustrated with is my father. He thinks the rules don't apply to him and he is carrying on doing whatever he likes. He does not drive but my mother goes along with whatever he wants for a quiet life. He is a nasty piece of work. I don't say anything controversial to him to protect my mother. In reality I would like to tell him exactly what I think of him and his behaviour. I would love a neighbour to report them.

We know 3 people who have died from this virus .2 were foster carers .thr other my older sister .we have been isolating for 7 weeks not been Out at all . .we have vunerable children .of course we miss our children grand children .but would never risk it .maybe she was having 1 of them days .i would ring and ask how she is . maybe she is embarrassed now .if she is a good friend .and just needed to vent

Think you really find out at times like these the true character of people and are they really worth your friendship? I think not!

Did nobody else read that this posters other half of 80 and working on the front line? I think she has more problems closer to home than a fed up friend.

Please thank your husband for his selfless dedication to the welfare of the rest of us.
Your friend may be having a panic attack, but is being completely unreasonable.
I am in awe of the people taking risks with their own safety to help people like me. The least we can do is to stay home and make as little work as possible for others and to be grateful for the help we are getting.

I had a phone call, this evening, from a friend who’s son died from the virus three weeks ago. Her sister, who lives in a nursing home, has now also got it. Her general health isn’t good, so she is almost certain to die, too.

Your friend’s attitude is more than disgusting, and it would serve her right if members of her family caught it, though I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.

We are just short of 3m worldwide deaths (probably far worse as I cannot believe China's figure!) Does she not realises that?

Yangtse1007 Report him yourself and help her to get out if it is that bad and you are concerned for her safety? I am sure you can do it anonymously ....

It could be the 80 year old husband is a retired doctor? They need all hands on deck remember?!

I agree, pleased you spoke your mind. It annoys me when I see people in our village not sticking to the rules. When we’re out on our walk I make an effort to walk o the other side of the road if we are going to pass someone, but other people don’t. We try to go when we think it’s quite after teatime. I get annoyed when I see one of our neighbours who has COPD and in the beginning told me if she caught it she’s a dead woman, then I see her talking over the fence to a neighbour a few doors away, not social distancing at all. I don’t give her a the chance to talk to me

How do they even know whether a vaccine will work fully anyway? Each year they give flu jabs,but still people die from it.each year people still catch different strains of it.

I agree with BlueBell. None of us really know what it's like to live another person's life. None of us can really know how hard this lock down is for other people. Everyone is worried by different things, different parts of the restrictions affect us differently. I can see why we need a lock down for a short time to suppress the virus. But more should have been done earlier to stop it taking a hold in the first place. Loads more should have been done for years to give us a more robust NHS and public health system in our country. The science surrounding it is not clear cut there are different ways and opinions on how it can be handled.
I strongly believe its quality of life not quantity that matters. I do not want to live for twelve months in lock down and then die not having seen my mother for a year nor given my grandson a cuddle. I would much prefer to have had those times with them and been able to go out for a drive on the countryside and die sooner. However equally I don't want to be responsible for passing the virus on to anyone else so I will respect and follow the regulations around the lock down. But it is getting harder and harder for me. I know I have a nice comfortable house to be locked down in but that doesn't stop the increasing mental anguish I am facing through being cut off from my family, and forced to only go out once a day.

We need to all do what we feel is right and try to respect other people decisions.

I think you were right to share your opinions with your friend but I think you just have to accept she has a different perspective on life to you. I hope you will be able to remain friends.

I think you were absolutely right in what you said. You may have lost a friend but she may just be having a really bad day and will apologise for her behaviour. By all accounts she also may have caused a difficult rift with her dil.

I think you should wait and see if she calls you back and gives you some sort of apology, I would be quite upset if a friend did this , but suppose I`m lucky that I know my friends feel the same as me.
We`ve been in lockdown for 6 weeks due to age (74 &75) and I also health issues warranting a letter from both the NHS and my surgery declaring I have to stay safe at home for 12 weeks .We have priority shopping and having never done that before it`s quite enjoyable . Mr Nick won`t go out to any shops in case he brings the virus home so we rely on youngest daughter who lives nearby to pop the daily paper through the letter box and give us a wave through the front door. The newspaper gets a bleach spray on it and left for a couple of hours before it gets looked at !
My point after all this saga of a reply is that we would rather stay safe in isolation for however long it takes than risk a painful death because we got fed up being home .
Anyone else having to do the 12 week isolation ??

yes, i think we will all have to change our habits for the foreseeable.
people used to laugh at me as i always opened doors in hospitals with a paper towel in my hand, and would never use my naked finger to press left buttons etc.
this i how we were brought up. i thank god for my parents' ways every day. some people would mock and say germs are everywhere, you can't avoid them. that doesn't mean i can't avoid some of them, and the very fact that i can't avoid all of them gives me greater impetus to try to avoid as many as i can. let us all do what we can.

I've come to realise,that sometimes in life we find that someone we respected as a friend or even family member acts in such a way that you did not believe possible. It is hard to maintain respect and regard as you accept what occurred.
You tried to reason with your friend and she responded badly and may regret that given enough time. How you treat her going forward is something you will think and worry over. Just be yourself and she may apologise. If not then it is time to forgive so that it doesn't 'eat you up'. Your relationship will change somewhat in that things won't be the same between you. But at least you can feel you did and said the right thing. Some friendships don't last forever.

It will get to a point where people will say whats the point in being alive if we can't thrive.

Notanan is right. Many feel like this.
As Sassl says too, not everyone can cope well. It's not logical and I wouldn't do anything dangerous to put anyone at risk but I feel I am just existing now. I am finding it all very hard and have to force myself to keep going. I'm sure many feel the same.