The Old Argy Bargy Bar.....a new lease of life!

There are only enough sets of teeth for us all to have one set....so don’t leave them in anyone’s neck please!
The word has got around about goth nite, so they will need to form an orderly queue.Peardrop you are on the door as security. The Admiral is bringing a few friends ( of a salty seadog disposition I expect) and Achilles and Kev and Thor say they have told all their friends to come too, should be a lot here.I have hiked the bar prices as high as my skirt, so we will be well in funds next week.?

Wait until you see my costume.....it’s the best one yet.
Am having a large gin and vermouth at the minute, is the sun over the yardarm?

Don’t be ridiculous lemon the sun never drops below the yardarm in the Argy. Looking forward to goth night tomorrow. Hoping it’s a big success. ?

Security hey Lemon do I get a uniform, or at least a proper peaked cap, or what about a badge, always wanted a uniform. I could double as a traffic warden and make even more dosh for the Argy.

peardrop that’s a good idea. You could have some gold braid on your arm and we could issue you with a walkie talkie to keep in touch over crowd control ?

ooh that sounds so exciting, could I have a whistle too or would that interfere with the effectiveness of my vampire teeth. Come in Doodle, come in Doodle, over and out.

Nice to see an Argy member being so helpful about work so well done Peardrop.Only the Admiral is allowed gold braid but you will be given a uniform......hope you like it, used to belong to an old friend who cleaned the municipal lavs in town.You must remember him, he had a gammy leg and a shifty look, used to call out ‘sixpence for a wash and brush up’
To passers by.Anyway, I have given it a good wash, there us still an odd ( very odd) stain or two on it, but nobody will notice I expect.Lovely shade of green innit? There’s a matching cap too. No whistle ( yes, it would indeed impact on your vampire choppers) but you may carry this small whip.
Some of our clientele really go for that!

Be in the bar bright and early everyone, plenty to do before the big night!

Oh yes peardrop lets have a walkie talkie each that sounds like fun. peardrop any good looking men coming in, over ? Yup I think that would work fine. I’ll get my hands on them before lemon ?

Any firm good looking necks are mine! You can have the old withered ones Doodle ?

No, I want some plump juicy ones too ?
Can’t wait for tonight. Just giving my teeth an extra polish ?

Come in Doodle Do you want to? Roger that or the other. over and out. Roger Doodle. No Admiral that was not an instruction to you.
A uniform is a uniform Lemon, green with stained bits will do nicely as long as the whip has some good dangly bits to wave about. Do I have permission to cut the bottom off the trousers to show off my red fishnets?

Carillion I will leave your newly crocheted red fishnets behind the bar, I might be busy slapping parking tickets on vampires.

Is the Admiral at it again? Watch out Doodle! I don't know where he gets his stamina being 127.

Wondering if he is a real vampire? He will fit right in.

Have you seen his teeth lately?

Smiling vampishly at the punters in saunters Doodle . I have my teeth in ready. peardrop who are you Rogering?

AGAA4 I didn't know the Admiral had lost his teeth, I'll keep an eye out for them when I'm frisking the punters on the door. Are they mustard coloured?

Doodle you are awful but I like you.
I know why James Bond took viagra...so he could Roger Moore.

Right you lot of degenerates....make way, make way! Here I come ( as the Bishop said to the actress)
Well...whaddya think, shall I give you a twirl? No Doodle not a choccy bar!
I made the outfit myself, tight black lace, a black bustier ( and nobody is bustier than me) boom boom!

Quite hard to talk wiv vese vamire teef in.Everyone looksh marvelloush anyvay.

AGA ( wait a min, these teeth have to go....ah that’s better)
You look great, what have you got on your head though?
Peardrop let the punters in three at a time only, it’s getting crowded in here!
Doodle what a sight you are! ( as usual) get the food circulating and make sure they pay for it upfront.

Where’s Carillion with those fish ‘n’ chips, has she gone to Harry Ramsden’s for them? The natives are getting restless.

Everyone’s in black ( apart from Peardrop in her lavvy green uniform) it looks like a funeral, albeit a very sexy one.
The Admiral has come as Dracula, although he has a ready made sepulchral look anyway, and those good looking guys with him are French matelots.Let me at ‘em!?

First three coming through, two firm but hairy necks and one scrawny
Next three include...........phwoar.... very handsome, sorry about two puncture wounds got carried away.
omg, please check that last bunch, me teeth have gone missing

I'm going to need me teef for the chish and fips, where is Carillion

peardrop really ??????? what will the punters think if you bite them on the way in? You could at least let them have a drink first.
lemon for goodness sake leave some for me. You’ve had a go at all of them tonight.
I don’t think you’ve properly explained goth night to AGA. The Admiral bent down to to pick up something and she’s bitten him on the bum ?. He’s wandering round with a pair of false teeth in his rear end ?