The Old Argy Bargy Bar....a new lease of life!

Where’s Chewy gone? Last time I saw her she was trying to see how many chop sticks she could hold under her enormous bosom. She had 88 under each last count. Thor has gone to get some more.

110 chopsticks, 2 spring rolls and a packet of prawn crackers so far Doodle. I'm rather proud of being able to fit 5 fortune cookies in my belly button.

As long as we don’t have to eat them Chewy?

It’s getting crowded in here, the Admiral and Captain and a full ship’s company, the fire crew, the entire tattoo parlour staff and Steamy Stan and his Chinese Laundry attendants.
They are all calling ‘Fight! Fight’ so come on AGA step lively now, the match is about to begin.

Ahem! Ladies an Gents, inna red corner we ‘ave the scourge of the seven seas ....The Red Admiral, an’ inna blue corner we ‘ave Argy AGA .....a real handful ( especially if you grab her by the nappy!)
Let the battle commence, no biting, spitting or gouging.....
Whoa! Look at them go!

C’mon AGA a half nelson and a two tit vice should clinch it. I’ve got two glasses of sake and a schooner of poteen riding on it.

Get to it AGA show em wot you’ve got.
Sigh. No I didn’t mean take your bra and nappy off. ?
Mind you, it might have worked. The Admiral has fainted ?

Chewy have you got a spring roll going spare. All this fighting is making me peckish. ?

It was a close call, but AGA won on points, will somebody please throw a cold flannel on the Admiral, hope he won’t be traumatised for life.
That brought some much needed moolah for the bar , yipee.
I knew you had it in you AGA well done!? now go and put some clothes on.

Where are those horrible llamas? No food is safe with them around (although I could say the same for Doodle) when she has the munchies.
Cor, these five inch cork soled shoes are hard on the feet but it’s nice towering over everybody for a change.Am going home with Steamy Stan, he has promised me the best spring roll ever! Goodnight, honourable friends ?

Yes he said you liked the spring rolls so he bought a dozen from Chewy ....mind you they’re a bit squashed and warm.
You weren’t expecting anything else were you Lemon? ??. Off you go...chop chop. ?
Night night all. I’m going into the cellar with Thor. We’re going to empty all the vats......for cleaning purposes you understand. Ok Thor. I’ll lay under the tap and you turn it on ?

I've got a dozen more spring roles, some barbeque spare ribs (not my own) and a king fried chow mein keeping warm under me bazooms. Could do with being eaten tonight really as I need to get into my toga, ready for tomorrow.

Steady the Buffs! Roman Nite is a week away, your toga will be stained with all sorts long before then.

I would be interested to know where you hussies all spent the night?
Me and Stan made ourselves comfy back in the Chinese laundry, on a pile of unwashed shirts.By the time I had peeled off all my costume and wig etc he was snoring loudly, ah well, can’t win ‘em all.

The bar is busy today, Thor looks worn out ( strange as we only opened the doors at 11.30.)?
I am serving up last night’s feast for lunch, the customers are gobbling it all up, even Chewy’s bazoom warmed delicacies.
I shall sit here in the corner for a while now with a in case anyone interesting comes in.

Just crawled up from the cellar wearing one of Thor's thongs as the llamas ran off with my nappy and bra.
The Admiral was complaining that the fight had been fixed as he was smothered by my 60 inch chest. As Lemon had made a considerable amount of dosh from the win she bundled him down to the cellar and gave him a pint of poteen laced with sake and gin. He has forgotten about the fight now. Doodle did give him a snorkel so he could breathe so it was fair.

Thought I was seeing double but today I am stone cold sober and there are still two llamas! What happened there?

Laura Gnasher invited his cousin Groper? Check with Doodle she knows his name. Those llamas are partners in crime.

Not quite sure how we managed to get ‘The Farmer’s Llamas’
In here, but there are definitely two of them ( am sure a third is on the way)? and they are anarchists in furry coats.
Great news! Gorgeous George is back in the bar ( now sat morosely next to the Nespresso machine.) He says that Amal has left him to his own devices for a while whilst she ‘ follows a more spiritual path’ somewhere or other ( maybe Peru?)
You see, I think he missed us all anyway, I have made a lilo up for him to sleep on in the scullery.
I have first dibs on him btw.?

AGA you are on the right track but it is Gnasher and Grasper (I think ?). Groper works for me though ?
I’ve thought of a brilliant idea lemon. Instead of wasting money on heating the oven we can just put the food under Chewy’s enormous bazoom and serve it hot and moist from there. With her capacity we could probably start taking bookings for parties of 50 or more. ?

Don’t need the lilo lemon I am prepared to make the sacrifice ?

Laura according to lemon we have a third llama on the way. You can name that one if you like ?

Doodle, Lemon has locked George in the scullery till she has finished with him. None of us will be allowed near him.
It will be mayhem with three llamas. I think they have been trained by Attila the hun. Devastation follows wherever they go.

Thank you Doodle. I think I'll call him/her Clock as in Llama-Clock as they keep us all awake.
I am coming in later dressed as a lilo so that George will lie on me. I hope he doesn't smell of Lemon's eau de immac perfume when she's finished with him

Ooh llama clock I love it. By the time lemon’s finished with George he won’t be fit for anything. ?

You are right Doodle George will have to go off on a long holiday after Lemon has finished with him.
Have we got 4 llamas now? Gnasher, Grasper, Groper and Llama-clock.
They are forming a pack. Beware!