Will I ever be able to just think of me?

I have that problem as well Doodledog

Then he should be sorting it out himself.
The CAB online has lots of info on what to do if you're having issues with furlough payments, and benefits.

Stating a timescale is a good idea.

OP's son has had difficulty getting furlough payment - it doesn't happen as automatically for everyone as people might hope and he may get nothing at all - and as he has a job, he won't get benefits either.
The benefits system, in any case, seems designed to obstruct and is now under even more pressure from increased numbers of people who are out of work.

There was one reply when I started typing, and now there are several before mine . Sorry if I have repeated what others have said - I must type faster.

I think the son had problems getting furloughed, so presumably has no income?

What would you like to do, Skysearcher? At 66, you have more than earned the right to retire if you want to, and shouldn't feel guilty for doing so. Do your son and daughter get benefits or other income? Is your daughter able to work?

Either way, as adults they should be supporting themselves, even if you help out now and then when they need it.

I know we never stop being mothers, and always want to help our children, but I can't help thinking that it's time for you now.

Maybe give your daughter a deadline by which she needs to find a job and contribute to your budget, or find somewhere of her own to live (whichever would work best for you).

Do you have a partner living with you? Are they contributing financially, or is all the responsibility yours? It doesn't seem fair that you should be propping up so many people, particularly as you have health issues. I think it's time for some straight talking, but you need to be prepared to stick to your guns.

I have to agree with timetogo It's time to get your life back, talk to your children and put time scales in place for them to sort themselves out and stick to it. You have done enough now and need to consider your own health.

I think you need to stop financially supporting your son and daughter.I don’t think it does our adult children any good if they think every time they need anything they can come to us.When we are no longer here they will have no idea of how to stand on their own two feet.If there was an emergency I would help my children straight away but for them to be financially dependent on you isn’t doing them any good

You could put a time limit on it.Maybe say I will be retiring in six months time so will no longer be able to support you?

It`s up to you what you do,you have raised them and i think it`s time they stood on their own two feet and grow up.
This is your life so take it back and stop giving yourself to them.
The more you do,the more they will let you.

How old is your daughter, and what work does your son usually do?
I'm wondering why you are supporting them both as your son would have been getting 80 percent of his wages?