Would it bother you

It is different if you are in a shop or on a bus, train, etc., where you have no ongoing relationship with the employees or other shoppers/service users. But if you are at work you have colleagues with whom you interact on a daily basis, and I think it is insensitive, if not rude, to speak with one or more other people in a language that you know other colleagues don't understand.

I agree with Alegrias and Illte. Living abroad, I am often in a shop or restaurant speaking English with my family and friends. No way am I going to switch to German just so everyone can eavesdrop.

This is a typical attitude of monolingual people.

I was once on a bus trip in France with a group of German people, visiting our twin town in France. I was talking to one lady who was complaining about people doing just that:speaking Turkish (or whatever their mutual language was) in a shop in Germany. As we were already in France by then, I pointed out to her that, in that case, we should be speaking French to each other.

I've worked with two women, and one explained that her co-worker found it easier to understand instructions in their own language.
Not a problem at all.

I think it is rude to converse in another language when in the presence of people who don't understand it - particularly in a work setting. It could make some people feel uncomfortable and excluded.

I think it's perfectly fine otherwise - I don't subscribe to Nigel Farage's distaste for people on buses speaking to each other in the language they are most familiar with.

Except for the fact that English is the universal language.

What arrogance.

Wellbeck I overlooked that. Yes, makes a difference Otherwise I would. It's one of my pet hates. Just such bad manners.

Now, like ninathenana I'm expecting some disapproval for this, but here goes anyway....

I do think its a bit of paranoia that some of you think they are talking about you because they are speaking their own language. Maybe there are some examples of it but most people are just getting on with their own lives and don't even think about what language they are speaking, or who is in their shop....

And don't underestimate the effort it takes to have full conversations in one's second language, after a while it gets too hard and reverting to your first language is really a relief. I speak from experience!

You’re right, it’s happened to me (and I speak Welsh ?) and it’s also happened in every country I’ve been in all over the world - human nature eh?

The other thing is the ‘Sotto voce’ out of the corner of the mouth in England when DH and I have walked into a shop speaking Welsh to each other. The surprise on the assistant’s face when I thank them profusely ?

Just about to post the same, GillT57; used to happen regularly in Wales, and done quite deliberately.

Very rude. We had this treatment in Wales, walked into a shop, staff and existing customers speaking English, as soon as we spoke they all started speaking Welsh, and laughed as we left the shop. For the last time as we never went back.

DiscoDancer1975

*Pantglas2*, I wouldn’t expect anyone to speak English in their own country. It’s lovely of them if they do, but up to us to learn theirs.

Except for the fact that English is the universal language. They would only need to learn one language, whereas us in the UK would need French, Italian, Spanish, German ....
?

Not at all I agree with Alegria. If I lived abroad I'm sure I would still speak English to English speaking friends, even with natives present!

Pantglas2, I wouldn’t expect anyone to speak English in their own country. It’s lovely of them if they do, but up to us to learn theirs.

annep1

Yes it's rude and she should say so

having been very lucky to get a job in this economic climate, i wouldn't be telling the owner's daughter what to do.
can be dismissed for no reason during first two years.
actually the OP situation wouldn't bother me.
i don't like talking in the work place generally.
i think it distracts from a work focused environment.
if they want to waste time gossiping, that's up to them.
i seem to be in the minority. cannot imagine dining in someone's house and giving them disapproving looks. that seems rude to me. when in Rome...

I’m feeling quite odd reading most of these posts as I’ve been to weddings/christening in India, Greece, and Spain where few spoke English and I’ve accepted that they’ll all speak to each other in their usual language!

Why would they change it for me? I’m not precious and don’t need to be given special privileges when invited to someone else’s event. I can quite happily sit there interpreting smiles, body language and enjoying the occasion, without thinking it all about me (or my big bum?)

Yes it would and does bother me. A person in our family is married to a person from another country and religion. They are lovely people and very friendly and regularly invite ( invited) us to big family gatherings. They all spoke to each other in their own language so DH and I often spoke just to each other. If you started a conversation with one person, and they all spoke good English, if someone else came along they were very soon back to their own language. I don’t think it occurred to them that we found it difficult

They may not mean to be rude. If you are truly bilingual you slip without thinking from one language to another. You tend to respond in the language that's been spoken to you.
It would also be quite rude for the two fluent English speakers to talk together knowing that the third person could only follow some of the conversation. Then she would feel insecure and left out.

If the the bilingual person also chats to the OPs friend in English I don't really see what the problem is.

Grief yes....so rude, particularly in a work place where you’d hope everyone was on the same page as it were. I’d feel really uncomfortable, and for a meal too Smileless. I often find it hard enough to eat in a social environment, without someone I haven’t met before talking in another language! Glad you gave them the ‘ daggers ‘ look?.

Very rude. When visiting our son in Aus. last year, we were invited by some friends of his for a meal during which the mother started talking to their children in Greek.

Her husband apologised and said they must appear as being rather rude I think the look on my face told him all he needed to know.

She carried on!!!

Yes, it’s rude. If one person can’t speak good English, fair enough, but it should be translated. Otherwise they should wait until they’re alone, then the one who speaks good English should be talking to the other in English anyway, as much as possible, otherwise when will they learn?

OH? DH!

My OH and I lived in France for a while, and we worked in the same place. We both speak French. The idea that we would have had a conversation with each other in French would have been very weird. Of course we spoke to each other in English, even if someone else was in the room! Do you think they were interested in what we were having for tea?

But if we were doing anything related to our jobs, or we were in a conversation with anyone else, then we spoke in French.

I have friends today from other countries who speak to each other in their native languages. I'm not paranoid about what they are saying. And if they do think I have a big bum, I really don't care!

Yes it's rude and she should say so

Apparently one of them speaks very good English, the other not so good but can converse in English.

A friend who was married to a Greek Cypriot and had lived in Cyprus for years, one day went into a shop where she wasn’t known.
She was always somewhat overweight - this is relevant. Since she didn’t look like a local the two assistants started talking about her very rudely in Greek - ‘Look at the state of her, fat cow,’ etc.

She waited until she was about to leave the shop, having paid and spoken to the two-faced smiling assistants in English - and then turned and gave them a choice mouthful in Greek!

‘You should have seen their faces!’ she said, still relishing it. ‘That’ll teach them!’ ?