The Argy Bargy Bar...the lease has been secured!

I don’t think you could be more buxom Lemon not without tucking them behind your ears. Now get behind the bar wench and serve up a couple of pints in tankards for me and the boys ?

Utter Kernutters the lot of you

Just passing by on my way to the workhouse. Have fun.

doodle With you, d'Artagnan. My musket is cocked and ready in anticipation. Lovely moustache - give us a twirl.
I'm d**m glad I slathered myself in 45 year old stale vintage Aramis aftershave. The pong in here is but dreadful. Is it those llamas (what IS their diet?) or the Admiral? (same question).

Would you like a pint Aramis before we swashbuckle ?

Ooh please, doodle. Preferably one which doesn't have dubious bits floating in it. Is Porthole Porthos coming? We can't be 'one for all' when we're at half strength.
Do we fraternise with the workhouse next door? (Still finding my feet round here).

I just found a moustache in my poteen
Whose is it?

Pouring down out there, here I am like a drowned dog, just call me Pawthos. What are the cocktails this week?

Careful with that poteen I saw the captain trimming his beard over that. No different to usual but when he trimmed his nostril hair I did wonder if that was snot the sort of kick we want in the poteen

?

The poteen is strong enough to kill viruses as big as a horse

You look great Doodle if I didn’t know it was you under that beard, feathered hat and waxed moustaches I would definitely fancy you.
No cocktails tonight, I had a busy day, but we are on the absinthe if you care to join us Laura, bottoms up! Or should I say derrieres.

Karaoke is set up now, and the able seamen are jostling to have a go, but I promised ixion first go on it......you sock it to ‘em girl!

Karaoke? I'm there!!

Copacabana here I come

able seamen are jostling to have a go

Where's the First Lieutenant?
He's rather a good baritone (so he said)

I'm up next with 'bend me shake me'

Was hoping to go last as redemption from a night of over-pleasuring and indulgence but this is now in anticipation of same...
Mike please (is it cleaned with an antiseptic wipe?).
Noooo,rien de rien, je ne regrette RIEN. ???.
I flatter myself that my renditions are on a par with Edith's in René's bar.
What's that, they're demanding???

I'll sing Ring of Fire

Always popular at a karaoke, especially after a vindaloo the night before.

I love Edith

Come on soldier put ya musket ‘ere and we’ll do a duet, how about
‘Voulez-vous coucher avec moi, ce soir’

Edith Artois and I are divas, Edith Piaf comes across as, well, so French....

LauraNorder

Come on soldier put ya musket ‘ere and we’ll do a duet, how about
‘Voulez-vous coucher avec moi, ce soir’

Ooh er, you forward hussy

ixion

Edith Artois and I are divas, Edith Piaf comes across as, well, so French....

Perhaps because she was, well, er, French

??? ?? ????

Moi aussi, je ne regrette rien
Il etait tres, well, just tres.

'Three' what, callistemon??

Out of my way everyone I’m leaping from the rafters like they did in the film her I cooooooommmmmmmmeeeee
Sorry Laura didn’t see you there ? Here I’ll bend down and help you up. Ooops sorry Callistemon I didn’t mean to poke you in the derrière with the tip of my sword. I do apologise. Let me help you to a seat. Oh sorry lemon I appear to have knocked your drink over with the feather in my hat . Seems there’s more to being a musketeer than I realised.

Think we’ll have to give you French Leave Doodle ( and take your French letters with you) or ‘billy do’s’ as I call them.