The Argy Bargy Bar...the lease has been secured!

No Russians thanks Laura they drink all the ‘wodka’?
Anyone else have any ideas? We can always fall back on Salty Sam ( although not literally as he isn’t overclean) who works down the docks ( barnacle clearing a speciality) and is always up for some cash in hand.

What about Fast Franz the fastest cocktail shaker in the west and the south. He is looking for a job. Tall and hunky too.

Well, that’s it then, Fast Franz has got the job ( Salty Sam was always a last resort!) See if he can start tomorrow AGA and he can start experimenting with you in the cellar.....we need new cocktails for Swiss Nite.Something with brandy and toblerone would be good.

I thought we could get some Swiss Cheeseplants to brighten the place up, and then start planning costumes.I thought a cheesecloth top ( low cut) and a dirndl skirt (mini) with some false plaits and a cute little hat made to look like Swiss cheese ... you get the cheese motif????????

Right I’ve cleaned the llamas out and taken them for a long walk. We came back via the car wash so they are all soft and fluffy now. We met George outside so I gave him a bit of a going over too......GrannyGravy you’ll have to be more gentle with him he’s gone all floppy.?

I’ve got the Swiss cheese plants you wanted lemon . I found some broken off branches and tied some Emmental to them. Quite why you want them I don’t know.
Ive sewn some pieces of Emmental together to make your cheese cloth top... mind you, you’ll have to be careful where the holes are or the Admiral will get over excited.
Now what else was on the list ?

My hat!

Just had a shuftie through the bloomers. Thought I’d nabbed mine as I spotted the purple spandex but then realised they were crotch less so I think they’re Maw’s? Eventually I found mine - not sure the purple ties are long enough but my drindl skirt will cover any shortcomings I suppose.

GG13 and Doodle have been practicing our clog dance without me. I’d better learn the steps or I’ll mess things up. I’m already nervous as it’s my first threesome.

I’m getting excited already for Swiss Nite!

I’ve taken down all the curtains so that we can make costumes for anyone who wants to sneak across the border with the Von Trapps to our Swiss night. ??the hills are alive with the sound of ??

Whaddya think of Vlad then....handsome or what ( don’t say what) look at him there behind the bar polishing the glasses
With his hanky, phoar!
He smiles a lot and has the whitest teeth I’ve ever seen, even if they do look a bit sharp.Anyhoo.....he seems to have settled in
And has been eyeing up AGA and Urmston all night, when I interviewed him he murmured ‘Iss true all the bootiful laydees work here?’ And I assured him that we certainly are fine examples ( well, ample anyway) of mature womanhood.

lemon are you sure Vlad said he comes from Russia? I caught a glimpse of his passport and I thought it said Transylvania. ?
Urms you’ve got your clogs on the wrong feet. Do try and keep up. Now, all together clump clump heel clack clump, clump clump, heel clack oops Urms can you get up by yourself ?

Well, he said Rumania ( he’s an up to date chappie) even if he is a vampire .....haha! They don’t exist, do they??

Why is the bar shaking, is there an earthquake going on?

Don’t worry lemon it’s just us girls practicing our clog dance.
All together now, Urms, Grannygravy clump clump and our finale a high kick......oops sorry lemon I forgot we were wearing clogs.....two black eyes and a lump on the head...you’ll look fetching on Friday ?

Sorry to have missed you last Friday. Despite hollering at the window, I just couldn't get in....
Something, they said, about the server going down?
Don't you make them finish their bar shift before they go off and enjoy themselves?

Hey ho, back to the lavs. Still working on a promotion?
Have found some decaying tins of emulsion paint in the cellar. Dodgy colour, but I have added some crushed beetles and now have a delicate pink shade for the walls of the girls' toilets.

Finishing touches on Friday will be vases of edelweiss and rose petals strewn over the floor. Oh, and some Lindor truffles (note theming) on the vanity unit.
Boys' toilets tomorrow when I have found some blue for the walls.

NB NO rose petals for their floors. Can you imagine??

Ixion there is one pair of bloomers left for you in a dusky pink with cream Swiss lace trim, pick them up from behind the bar when you’ve finished your shift.
So you’ve used the crushed beetles in your paint, I’ll have to think of something else for the lunch time soup.

Ooh, lovely.
Thanks?

Glad to see you *ixion". The ladies isn't too bad but even the llamas are avoiding going near the gents.

Along with our clog dancing I am practicing a very apt song..........*I am 16 going on 17* ?????????

In your dreams GG13 ( it’s about as apt as your rendition of Like A Virgin)?
Well done ixion the lavs look a real treat, am thinking of your promotion if you keep this hard work up.For another month anyway.
I know what to sing for karaoke this week Doodle ‘two lovely black eyes, oh what a surprise!’

Anybody's granny got a spare Reckitt's Blue? ?

My karaoke will be
"I love to go a-wandering, Along the mountain track" ?
A nice rousing chorus for audience participation (assuming they are upright by that stage)

I’ve just popped out of the kitchen in to the bar for a glug of ‘death by toblerone’.
I have left a beautifully iced swiss roll for you all to try. The pitted pattern is a result of perspiration, its jolly hot in that kitchen, especially with the new barman hovering over me. I have told him we all have a Vlad weakness, he led me to the ladies!

Val deri, Val dera

Just popped in to pick up the pink satin bloomers I ordered from Sadies - but the box marked ‘bloomers’ is empty apart from this pink bow. Still, I think that should cover me nicely . I might be able to make a bikini top with some triangles of Swiss cheese with holes in.....

And their cousins, too -
Val d'Isère, Val d'Aosta..

The more, the merrier?