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Original posters not returning to their threads?

(33 Posts)
NotAGran55 Tue 09-Feb-21 08:26:10

Why is this I wonder ? Asking for advice but never returning to acknowledge any responses .

Daisymae Tue 09-Feb-21 08:29:46

I've often wondered. Sometimes people go into great depths and get good responses and then never bother to reply. Very odd.

Blinko Tue 09-Feb-21 08:31:21

Perhaps some don't realize it's meant to be a two way street?

NellG Tue 09-Feb-21 08:39:17

I've noticed that sometimes they do, but their posts get lost in a further torrent of answers because those posters haven't read the thread, or even the few posts before their own and don't realise that they are saying the same thing as most others have. I think that the original posters just give up sometimes and wish they'd never asked! ?

Also some people are just rude.

sodapop Tue 09-Feb-21 09:14:19

That's true NellG but some acknowledgement that people have taken the time to respond would be nice.

Witzend Tue 09-Feb-21 09:21:31

Maybe they get exasperated with people who don’t read the OP properly, and give ‘advice’ that ignores the info the OP has given.
This is a bad example, but ‘Why don’t you just get a job, then?’ when the OP has said that she already works p/t, or can’t anyway because she’s a full time carer.

GagaJo Tue 09-Feb-21 09:21:58

If the thread gets very derailed, as they are wont to do on here, I could understand why. OR if they ask for advice but then it turns into a negative pile-on and the person just feels insulted, I can also understand.

lemsip Tue 09-Feb-21 09:26:01

and I agree with all of the above.

BigBertha1 Tue 09-Feb-21 09:40:59

I recently posed a question and was really surprised how long the thread went on for and it did meander a bit so I probably didn't get to the end of it. It was a bit like when you are having a real conversation and some of the people involved talk for a long time after its all been said.

Rufus2 Tue 09-Feb-21 09:50:03

Asking for advice but never returning to acknowledge any responses

Hard to do when the thread has been whipped away from beneath your feet without warning, as has just happened to me! sad .
OoRoo

Anie10 Tue 09-Feb-21 10:00:20

My husband is thinking of having dental implants, he is mid 60’s.
His quote is 20k for work required.
I struggle with the cost,
We can afford it but it’s a lot of hard saved money from retirement pot.
What are your view on value for money.

muse Tue 09-Feb-21 10:02:22

Agree with GagaJo and lemsip. Negativity is upsetting particularly if it's in answer to problem that is a serious worry to someone.

It would be really useful if GNHQ asked someone in their IT section to show the author's OP and comments all in the same colour.

What witzend said has happened to me. I've only asked one question (very short OP) on GN and got fed up with reading some answers where my question hadn't been read properly so I had to explain again my situation and one was very negative.

PamelaJ1 Tue 09-Feb-21 10:07:11

Anie you would get a better response if you started your own thread.
If you get lots of responses please respond!
I’ve had 4 so I’ll look out for your post.

Esspee Tue 09-Feb-21 10:24:49

On Mumsnet you precede the person’s name with an @ sign so the individual is notified that there is a response. E.g. @NotAGran55 or @Esspee It doesn’t have to be the OP, it could be replying to a point made by anyone.
It is extremely useful.
No idea why that feature is not on Gransnet.

Esspee Tue 09-Feb-21 10:38:37

Another very basic feature we don’t have on here is all the OP’s contributions highlighted. Forgive me if they are on your computer but on my iPad the original post is in blue or green, my posts are in pink, and all the other posts, including those by the OP have a white background.
It does mean that further information by the OP gets lost and not taken into consideration by future responders.

ExD Tue 09-Feb-21 10:41:44

That's useful Esspee thank you.
I have once been known not to return to my thread when someone made a very unkind remark, directed personally at me, (the OP) that was taken up by a couple of others and the vitriol that poured out reduced me to tears.
I just thought it best not to give them any more ammunition by replying and trying to explain what I'd really meant. I just didn't go back to look.
On a happier note, I think posts have got kinder recently with people less likely to bitch and criticise and hope its a trend that's going to stay.

PippaZ Tue 09-Feb-21 10:52:11

Esspee

On Mumsnet you precede the person’s name with an @ sign so the individual is notified that there is a response. E.g. @NotAGran55 or @Esspee It doesn’t have to be the OP, it could be replying to a point made by anyone.
It is extremely useful.
No idea why that feature is not on Gransnet.

I thought I had seen it somewhere on Gransnet. I didn't use it as it seemed a little silly calling someone @name. If it did what you suggest it would be a good idea and perhaps add to the flow of the conversation (and I would use it smile)

B9exchange Tue 09-Feb-21 11:11:30

I wonder if some just want to let off steam, and aren't really interested in the replies? Or occasionally they like to start an argument and then watch from the sidelines? smile

Missfoodlove Tue 09-Feb-21 11:58:14

It’s bad manners, rather like talking over someone.
I responded to a tech query, the OP never acknowledged my response but engaged with other posters.

Fennel Tue 09-Feb-21 12:32:35

For @ you just use the correct key on your keyboard followed by the user name. I sometimes do it.

cornishpatsy Tue 09-Feb-21 12:50:37

Could be many reasons, the thread has gone off subject, nasty comments, busy poster, just wanted to vent, forgot about it.

Lillie Tue 09-Feb-21 14:03:28

I think a quick thank you for the information offered would be nice.

NotAGran55 Tue 09-Feb-21 18:26:22

I was going to be ironic and not return but changed my mind smile

It is totally understandable in your case ExD to avoid returning to a thread but in most cases I find it very odd .

Regardless of how much a thread meanders and goes off-topic it seems strange to me that the poster doesn’t return.

On MN they have a name (GF) for trolls who start contentious threads and stand back to watch the fireworks ?

Even stranger are the simple ‘ Can you recommend me something’ threads that posters kindly contribute on without acknowledgment.

I don’t like to think that people are rude but I’m sure some must be ... they can’t all be forgetful.

PamelaJ1 Tue 09-Feb-21 19:49:58

ExD I have also dropped out of threads because people have taken offence at what I have typed and been very nasty. I don’t mean to upset anyone but some are easily offended.
The trouble is that I have a rather sarcastic sense of humour and even if I use a laughing emoji to indicate that my comment is to be taken lightly it still happens.
I hope I have learnt my lesson but, I doubt it?

Tangerine Tue 09-Feb-21 21:01:53

I also wish that, when the original poster made a further comment, their post could be highlighted in another colour. I think such a feature would be an asset to Gransnet.

Yes, it surprises me sometimes that OPs do not return to their threads.