The Argy Bar and Tea Room

brook...you look divine in that white pvc outfit and what a voice! It brought tears to my eyes.My ears are still ringing as well.

Thanks gmajet.
I shall start toot sweet.

"I'm just an old fashioned girl with an old fashioned mind
Not sophisticated, I'm the sweet and simple kind.
I want an old fashioned house, with an old fashioned fence
And an old fashioned millionaire"

Hey, doodle is looking daggers at me as I perch on Lord Lemon's lap.
Hopefully she won't recognise me in my new size 6 and with my booze and fag ravaged voice?

Final round now,
Hey Big Spender.
Blimey, that got them going. Raucous lot.
No class.

I haven’t seen gorgeous George for ages. I hope someone undid the chains...........

School holidays, gjet.
Amal doesn't get time off in her job.
Daddy daycare.

That isn’t Lord L, it’s the Russian captain of the ‘Aveitoff’ that huge container ship just in port today.
You’ve got lucky there ixion just beware if he asks you back to handle his samovar.

I think you're mistaken, lemon
He signed in as Captain of its sister ship, also in port.
The "Avitaweigh"

The samovar thing still applies ixion ?unless he isn’t Russian, in which case he may ask you back to admire his etchings/ coffee machine/ postcard collection etc.

Where is Lord Lemon? He was here earlier, flashing his credentials at us all, knocking back the poteen. I haven’t seen brook for a while either................ I think they’ve gone off to share a pork scratching in the back alley.

No more Russian than I am!
I quoted that bit from the Three Sisters where Masha goes on about being offended by anything coarse and vulgar and he hadn't a clue what I was talking about.
Have sent him packing downstairs to ogle at engage in conversation with the wrens.
Cheek.

You’ve gone all highbrow ixion! Maybe he’s just a low brow Russian made good, who has made his fortune on the high seas - I’ll just go and have a crack myself - I mean, check if he’s ok down there.

DF was an undercover agent in the Iron Curtain era.
Not a lot of people know that.

Right well that’s Lord L out of the picture. George doesn’t do it for me anymore. Always smells of coffee.
Ooh a Russian sailor......elbows out... ixion go and sing or something.
Ooh I love a man with a beard ??.......... oops, sorry Madam., you Russians are well built aren’t you.
Doodle slinks off to the corner to sulk.

Phew that was a night! Everyone is dance crazy and having a ball... I’ve been missing for a while as I got a bit tangled up backstage ... but I’m back now, only a bit disheveled and ready for the finale ..

brook why are you wandering round with half the lighting rig caught up in your clothing. You haven’t been up to no good with that lighting engineer again have you ?

Let’s finish all together with a rousing rendition of:-

‘What good is sitting alone in your room,
Come hear the music play,
Life is a cabaret, old chum,
Come to the cabaret.‘

Always a crowd pleaser. I’ll be Liza Minnelli.

What a great evening. Time to relax with one last cocktail....
Now where’s my Russian gone? Doodle? Have you nabbed him?

I wondered why I was so uncomfy Doodle i don’t know what happened, one minute I was on stage lapping up the applause then the next minute I was on the floor backstage in a heap ...
Right I’ve sorted out my lighting problem, ostrich feathers are back in my hair and I’m ready to give it one last go ...

Yes girls, well done. Off you go onstage, sing your hearts out.
I’ll join you in a bit. I’m just coming, you go ahead without me. I’m right behind you..............psst Igor cum viv me to der cellar I hav vokdka ja ?

Thor, Theo and I were exhausted keeping up with the cocktail and poteen requirements last night. We made a fortune! The Cabaret chillers were a favourite especially when we added marmite. Thor certainly knows what to do with his shaker.
Theo, who usually wears a thick shirt and knee length shorts got so hot he took his shirt off. Wow! Tall and tanned and young and lovely he is the boy from Ipanema.
Doodle hasn't noticed him .....yet.

Who, what, where......let me at him . ......oooh ?

Sorry I didn’t make it in today. I was so upset, my Russian captain stood me up - he promised to meet me in the back lane after the cabaret last night
I waited for ages. Did anyone see what happened to him? He promised to take me up the Volga too. So upset. ?
Now I need to drown my sorrows in poteen.

You be careful AGA.
Gary from Grimsby (he of the Hawaiian shirt) has got his eye on Thor now after the shirt lifting removal incident last night.

How much money have we got put aside now, after expenses?

Ah that’s such a shame your Russian captain was a no show grandmajet I think he might have been double booked with Doodle .....

?

We made 2k and expenses were £3/10/6 last night.

ooops. Sorry Grandmajet I didn’t know he was meeting you too. Actually he wasn’t that great. Kept talking about ailing the seven seas, made me feel sea sick.
He did send you a present ? but I’m not sure what you’re going to do with it. .....? says he calls her Octavia and she’s very handy in the kitchen ?