To see ourselves as others see us! How do you think others see you?

A free spirit, a hippy, is how my children describe me. I totally agree. It seems to draw people to me though I don't understand why.

I fully understand. Everyone thought I was coping after I lost my husband. Whenever anybody asked how I was I’d just smile and say fine thanks. People only have so much sympathy and they don’t really want to hear how awful you’re feeling and how much you cry. Hope things improve for you. It takes time but there is light at the end of the tunnel. Xxx

I have zero interest in what other people think of me, barring my husband, certainly not anything I would be losing sleep over! Looking for validation from others is the road to perdition.

Back in the days when I was working (about 11yrs ago) I was working in the NHS and the then Prime Minister said the NHS didn't need the Health Authorities so we were shut down.
For a bit of fun, we had a team leaving party and we did our "Fake Oscars" with silly categories like 'most prim and proper', 'nicest team member' etc.
I was flabbergasted to find myself winning the award for 'bossiest team member' and showed my disdain as I went to collect my cardboard Oscar.
Fortunately, when we voted, we had to say 'why' we were choosing our specified person for said category and winners were given the list of reasons along with their Oscar.
Two of my votes came with notations from a senior colleague and my boss, saying:
"She's not really noisy per se but if she didn't keep on telling me I was filling in forms and expenses incorrectly, is have been in big trouble or never received my expenses - thank you for 'bossing' me about them"
And
"I've always considered her to be my rottweiler, she's kept everyone else at bay because she knows how to do not only her own job but mine too and could deal with anything anyone threw at her, this allowing me to do my job unhindered".
So, the moral of my story was that as much as I was 'labelled' in our awards as 'bossy', it was meant with love and gratitude because there wasn't a more appropriate titled award on offer.
Ultimately, I have cherished that award and still have both the cardboard Oscar and the certificate with people's reasons for voting on the back, stashed away somewhere safe.

Blooming predictive text....
Not really 'bossy per se- not 'noisy'

I'm just waiting for someone to say they are seen as a nasty old bi. Would they even know it? Probably not. I've met a few, though.

I’m seen as a bit of a snob……….which is probably true.

This was a response to GreenGran78 - must try and get on top of posting correctly. But in response to many of the posts here, I do feel that many of us successfully hide insecurities beneath a confident exterior. We also often successfully hide them from ourselves...

I think that some people see me as a bit standoffish, really it is the fact that I am quiet in some situations and weigh things up before wading in. I can also be very direct and not very tactful.

I recently applied to Iceland on a part time basis. They had me undergo a whole battery of personality tests. The results astonished me. I did not pursue the job further as I suddenly lost interest in working for them. But I did get some useful information to work on myself from.

That's a shame Dabi as they are a great company to work for and work how best to train you wrt results from these tests

Mom? I had no idea you were on gransnet @Merylstreep. I thought you were doing the decorations today

I can only base my idea of how other people see me on what has been said to me at various times - and like most I remember the nice things and forget the less than kind (though probably most accurate).

I know that I have always been seen as a bit of an oddity. When I was at school, one of the teachers (we never did discover which) did a quotation for every girl in the O level year. Mine was 'Never genius without tincture of madness'. Not that I was an academic high flyer, I wasn't. I was perceived as clever but my schoolwork didn't reflect this. Mainly, I think, because, as I now know, I am mildly dyspraxic and my handwriting looked as if a drunken spider had been let loose on the page and was indecipherable.

Later on DS commented, in his teenage years, that 'He was glad he had eccentric parents', which came as a surprise to us, we thought we were very conventional. At later date he said that he was glad he had non-materialistic parents. Again not something we were aware of.

However the description I most treasure is when someone I respect described me as 'deeply subversive', which goes back to being seen as a bit of an oddity, with which I am entirely comfortable.