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Not sure if I am allowed to ask this on here.....

(196 Posts)
Sarnia Tue 22-Feb-22 11:02:27

As a fairly newish poster I may be breaking Gransnet rules by asking this question but here goes. Alegrias1 is a frequent and lively poster on here, usually on the more in-depth topics but I haven't seen any responses from her in a while. I have been wondering if she is ok. I hope she is.

Germanshepherdsmum Wed 23-Feb-22 11:44:43

Alegrias spoke with authority. She was extremely knowledgeable.

Doodledog Wed 23-Feb-22 11:49:59

It doesn't have to be all or nothing, does it? People can have a bit of a break when life offline gets busier, or if they are just tired of posting for whatever reason. It's not as if they are moving to the other end of the country (and even if they do there is likely to be internet access?).

If someone decides to leave (as opposed to just not posting for a while) it is usually after something unpleasant has happened, and on the whole the memory of these things fades with time, so the poster decides to come back. It's more difficult to do this if they have 'flounced', though, so on the whole people quietly go off and lick their wounds, then either come back, find a different board that suits them better, or retire from internet discussions in favour of another way of filling their time.

I can understand asking after a poster who's vanished, particularly if she has been prolific, as in any community the dynamics can be shifted if the 'personnel' changes, and also as we feel we know people with whom we interact on here; but I wonder if too much of a 'post mortem' makes it less likely that someone will come back, particularly if people have made negative comments about someone who may already be hurting?

Iam64 Wed 23-Feb-22 11:52:07

Hello lemon grove, we rarely agreed on politics though I do remember some occasions when peace broke out on politics.
I was aware you were taking a break but it’s good to hear from you.
I enjoyed Algerias. I hope Chewbacca is taking a break and will return
I learn a lot from some of the politics/news threads, I don’t post much on those where very strong critical, negative feelings towards others are expressed. I rarely find life quite as black.white

Namsnanny Wed 23-Feb-22 11:52:15

?Good post Doodledog

paddyann54 Wed 23-Feb-22 12:15:39

Just in case your reading Alegrais1 I 'm sorry to see you go.Always good to hav eat least a few like minded folk around as one wise Scottish granny told me when I left .I learned to avoid some people that way the pile ons are less.
Its like life in the UK ,theres more in one part than in others so they think they are entitled to tell us how to run our lives and how to think! Good luck in what comes next for you ,you'll be missed

Lucca Wed 23-Feb-22 12:40:15

eazybee

Thankyou Lemongrove for the update.

With regard to political party- bashing; it isn't the arguments that are off-putting, it is the unprovoked gratuitous rudeness, of which there are some examples on this thread.

Really ? Where is the rudeness?

Josieann Wed 23-Feb-22 13:02:32

I wonder if too much of a 'post mortem' makes it less likely that someone will come back, particularly if people have made negative comments about someone who may already be hurting
I wondered that too, Doodledog, there has been quite a few maybe justifiable negative comments on more than one thread.

In the immortal words of Alegrias in 2020 we do NOT talk about posters who have stopped posting on GN.

Callistemon21 Wed 23-Feb-22 16:11:17

Josieann

^I wonder if too much of a 'post mortem' makes it less likely that someone will come back, particularly if people have made negative comments about someone who may already be hurting^
I wondered that too, Doodledog, there has been quite a few maybe justifiable negative comments on more than one thread.

In the immortal words of Alegrias in 2020 we do NOT talk about posters who have stopped posting on GN.

I'm surprised this thread hasn't been deleted or that we haven't at least been rapped over the knuckles by GNHQ!

Millie22 Wed 23-Feb-22 17:38:07

I've just got home and am amazed this hasn't been deleted. GN say all the time that we aren't allowed to talk about posters who have left.

Yammy Wed 23-Feb-22 18:19:12

Some one could always ask gransnet to remove it if we are not meant to talk about people who are left.

Germanshepherdsmum Wed 23-Feb-22 18:20:56

I don't think anyone has said anything unpleasant about posters who have left, have they? Rather the reverse.

Yammy Wed 23-Feb-22 18:26:22

Sorry meant to say who have left.

Callistemon21 Wed 23-Feb-22 19:51:45

Yammy

Some one could always ask gransnet to remove it if we are not meant to talk about people who are left.

I don't see why we can't but perhaps the posters themselves might still be reading even though they have deleted their accounts.

Perhaps that's why.

Doodledog Wed 23-Feb-22 20:01:15

Where are the rules that explain what we can and can't say on here? I have asked this several times, as it seems idiotic to have 'rules' that people only know about from experience of falling foul of them. I've never had an answer, though.

JaneJudge Wed 23-Feb-22 20:05:22

I have asked Sue Gray to look into the rules
Sue Gray will know

Galaxy Wed 23-Feb-22 20:12:31

If you click on forums and scroll to the bottom you will see forum guidelines.

Bellanonna Wed 23-Feb-22 20:21:06

I’m sorry Lemongrove has left, even if temporarily. She was one of the funniest people on here. Great sense of humour.

JaneJudge Wed 23-Feb-22 20:21:25

I'm going to wait for Sue Gray instead

JaneJudge Wed 23-Feb-22 20:22:07

wrt to forum guidelines

Elegran Wed 23-Feb-22 20:24:50

www.gransnet.com/info/netiquette

Yammy Wed 23-Feb-22 20:27:07

Germanshepherdsmum

I don't think anyone has said anything unpleasant about posters who have left, have they? Rather the reverse.

I think everyone was pleased to hear from lemon grove and how she was happy to retire for while and told her how she would be missed and Aligrias was very much praised. I enjoyed my Border/boarder fights maybe should say sword fights with her and I think she did to and I give everyone a laugh with my atrocious spelling, which I have recently found out I have passed on.blush

lemongrove Wed 23-Feb-22 20:28:48

Thanks to posters for their nice words.smile
Other than this ( on this thread) I won’t be posting again ( this year) although if anyone revives The Argy for Christmas, I may pop in for a pint of festive poteen.
I didn’t know that Alegrias had left too, or POGS but suspect that many posters have done and it’s just not been noticed.....
(Only us noisy ones that get missed)grin
Have a good year all.

Josieann Wed 23-Feb-22 20:29:35

I can't see anything in those rules which says people can't talk about posters who are no longer posting on GN?

Doodledog Wed 23-Feb-22 20:43:02

Josieann

I can't see anything in those rules which says people can't talk about posters who are no longer posting on GN?

No, I have looked there too (albeit ages ago) and there is nothing. There have been threads where people use codes to mention people, and say that lapsed or banned posters must not be named, but that always has shades of the desaparecidos of S America.

I can understand it being frowned upon to talk about banned posters as they can't defend themselves, and personally I don't think it's very fair to say anything negative about people other than in extremis, (and then to their face); but if mentioning the disappeared is actually against the Ts and Cs, I think we should know.

Callistemon21 Wed 23-Feb-22 20:46:36

Galaxy

If you click on forums and scroll to the bottom you will see forum guidelines.

But you could fall foul of other rules which are an unwritten part of the GN constitution.