I know,I said I need to be nicer...

Gotta go now.
I posted this last year as I remember.
She was shouting through my door then, too.

Oh dear.

A friendly, helpful neighbour is a blessing but she is taking over your life.

I did mention it to the most sensible of her family.
They said she runs everybody down except me

Now I feel awful.

Smileless2012

Good grief MissA, no wonder you're at the end of your tether.

Would it be possible to mention this to one of her family? It's far from normal behaviour and really does sound like dementia.

There's no need for you to feel mean. You need to get this off your chest and she doesn't know, so no harm done .

Her family are the cause of all her stress.
This one blocked that one on facebook... blah blah blah.

OMG a visit once a month would be too often. I am afraid I would end up telling her straight and upsetting her.

Oh, it would drive me potty, MissA!

You could try what Elegran suggests.
However, I agree with others, it sounds as if she is developing dementia and does her family realise what she's like?

She is going to make me an icecream now...
I'll have to go out.
Sigh.
Hopefully only one more visit after this one, by which time I'm exhausted and havent got anything done.

Good grief MissA, no wonder you're at the end of your tether.

Would it be possible to mention this to one of her family? It's far from normal behaviour and really does sound like dementia.

There's no need for you to feel mean. You need to get this off your chest and she doesn't know, so no harm done .

That sounds like a good plan, elegran.

She sits and waits until I'm off the phone, or sits outside and keeps shouting through the door!
"Oops, sorry, are you still on the phone"?
Yes.
"Still?? Who's that then? Oops, sorry, I'll just get a chair and sit outside"

Could you tell her that "the doctor" has said that you are suffering from some obscure ailment (make up some long words) and you MUST have a long nap every afternoon.

Each afternoon, fix a notice on your door that says you are having your nap now, until XX o'clock and please not to disturb you, as you will not answer the door. Then lock the door and go to the furthest away room with a pot of tea and a book, or log into gransnet and chat away there. If the doorbell rings, ignore it until the time you stated.

She will probably turn up then with a treat to cheer you up, and yak on, but at least you will have had a break from it!

The next time she appears could you have your phone pressed to your ear whilst you’re involved in a series of very important and lengthy conversations ?

It's almost like a compulsion she has to talk at me, and get out what she needs to say.
She isn't lonely, either, she has a big family and friends, and goes out and about every day.

She has had a couple of memory tests in the past Maybee, and they said it was stress and anxiety making her forgetful.
She is waiting for another appt, though for a memory test.

Perhaps she doesn't even realise she is calling on you so often.
She sounds like the elderly parent who constantly phones their adult child.

And... here she is, sitting outside my flat, shouting through the door, right on cue!

She came down after taking two strong sleeping pills last night, and told me she was going to rub cheese into her back.
She meant cream.

It sounds to me as if she might be in the early stages of dementia. I know one of my neighbours kept phoning me when he had dementia.

But, she also fills my watering can, offers me a roast dinner every Sunday.
Tidied up all of my pots and plants when I couldn't manage it.
Offers to collect prescriptions for me.
So she is certainly not all bad.

Now I'm a bit forgetful we sound like the two Ronnie's sitting outside my flat
She has had a stroke, and it has left her just dippy, which she was before it happened, frankly.

You are absolutely not being mean.

When you see her coming, put your coat on and say “oh I was just on my way out” ?

Now I feel really mean.
I just don't feel well enough to be patient with all this.
She puts her fags out in my pot plants, as well.
Then throws them on the grass outside my flat.

Sorry, the floodgate has opened now and I can't stop!!!

Maybee
She is slowly getting worse, I think.
There is no doubt she has some decline, but she is very, very able and mobile.
She can't remember names and things like that, which adds an extra layer of stress to me.
"Are you in?"
Yes.
"Where are you then?"
Trying to get something done like fold washing.
"Well I saw that woman today and she asked after you".
What woman was that?
"The blonde one".
Did you get her name?
"No, oh hang on, I'll just come in and tell you".

I agree with VioletSky. I think you need to tell her straight.
Ask her not to come more than once a day, or whatever you want.
If she keeps it up, explain that you'll help her by putting up a 'Do not disturb ' sign at times you are resting.

"Have you eaten"?
Yes.
"What have you had then"?
I'm eating now!
"Hang on, I'll just come in for a minute"
Sigh.

Has she got worse recently?