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Paying towards Xmas stay

(90 Posts)
Coco1 Wed 23-Nov-22 11:25:01

Just wondered how much per couple you would generally give your offspring and family to stay for 4 days including the booze and all the niceties?

Ro60 Wed 23-Nov-22 11:28:28

Nothing. I always go laden with food & gifts & take them out for meals, coffee & cakes, baby sit etc.

Poppyred Wed 23-Nov-22 11:29:49

At least £200.

Kate1949 Wed 23-Nov-22 11:33:02

I don't think they'd take it if we offered. We would take plenty of stuff with us though.

toscalily Wed 23-Nov-22 11:34:53

I would do the same as Ro60, or perhaps ask before hand what you might contribute & take regarding food & drink in case they have worked out menus for those 4 days. I would be uncomfortable having to breakdown & put a price on Christmas.

Davida1968 Wed 23-Nov-22 11:43:16

No cash as such other than as Christmas gifts. But like other GNs here, we'd go laden with gifts, be helpful, and do shopping (which we pay for) as well as taking them out for coffees, meals, etc.

Hetty58 Wed 23-Nov-22 11:43:44

We always ask what they'd like us to bring - and we take extra Christmas goodies, too, like chocolates, wine etc. I'm sure that they wouldn't take cash. If they're really on a very tight budget, though, I'd offer. When I was broke, my brother would send me an M & S voucher before Christmas to 'buy something nice' with - and I could spend it in the food hall - wonderful.

Islecat Wed 23-Nov-22 11:52:48

I usually give wine and meat vouchers for local shops. That way they can buy what they like, and support local businesses at the same time. Also bring flowers with me.

Poppyred Wed 23-Nov-22 11:58:55

Easier to give cash so they can buy what they need. Anything you particularly want, take it yourselves.

GrannyGravy13 Wed 23-Nov-22 11:59:22

We take homemade chutneys, pickled onions, a gammon ham, mince pies, Christmas pudding along with champagne and wine.

Wouldn’t dream of giving family money for our dinner nor would I ever request it from guests.

Poppyred Wed 23-Nov-22 12:02:33

Poppyred

Easier to give cash so they can buy what they need. Anything you particularly want, take it yourselves.

By the way, everyone comes to us and we wouldn’t dream of taking any monies. We haven’t been invited anywhere else. 😂

ParlorGames Wed 23-Nov-22 12:03:08

I generally ask if there's anything specific they would like us to contribute beforehand, and always take extra treats in the form of wine, fresh fruit juice for drivers and young children, maybe a bottle of spirits and some posh chocolates for after dinner. Don't think it's possible to actually put a monetary value on it and actually, my DD's and SIL's don't expect anything at all.

Whitewavemark2 Wed 23-Nov-22 12:03:34

I simply transfer £100 into their bank account if we are eating at theirs for Christmas lunch. The Turkey will cost that alone.

I also take Christmas pudding and “mums” trifle, plus chocolates, perhaps crackers etc. oh and fizz! Of course.

Vintagenonna Wed 23-Nov-22 12:10:43

Ask if you can contribute and, if the answer is 'no', quietly give what you would have contributed to a food bank.

Auntieflo Wed 23-Nov-22 13:53:58

Since DD has taken over hosting Christmas for us, I have transferred cash into her bank account, labelled as Turkey and Tinsel.
She and SIL are very organised, so seem to have everything needed, so cash is a help towards the cost of our stay.

Norah Wed 23-Nov-22 14:00:11

Auntieflo

Since DD has taken over hosting Christmas for us, I have transferred cash into her bank account, labelled as Turkey and Tinsel.
She and SIL are very organised, so seem to have everything needed, so cash is a help towards the cost of our stay.

This is our way as well.

We give money, wine, vouchers, and sweets.

Anything, really, to help their budget.

Witzend Wed 23-Nov-22 16:58:39

When we’ve stayed at dd’s, we’ve brought the turkey, plenty of fizz and OJ for Buck’s Fizz, and lots of other stuff. 3 years ago, when she was very heavily pregnant, I took absolutely everything and cooked - in the hope of her putting her feet up!
‘Twas a forlorn hope….

Oreo Wed 23-Nov-22 17:03:19

No cash it’s family!
Drinks and all sorts of food yes, Christmas cake and bits.

Oreo Wed 23-Nov-22 17:04:44

My family would be real offended if I offered cash.

AreWeThereYet Wed 23-Nov-22 17:11:35

No money. We once offered and offended both D and SiL. Now we take things we know they like and tell them beforehand what we are bringing so they don't duplicate it unless they want to. We always take some flowers too and something we know the children like. We don't go over Christmas anyway, usually before or after.

AreWeThereYet Wed 23-Nov-22 17:16:36

I should say though that it does depend though on the financial circumstances of your own family - if you know they would appreciate the money to help them out, for instance. Maybe a mix of goodies when you arrive and some money if you think it would be well received? Or as some others do take them out for a nice meal before you leave?

henetha Wed 23-Nov-22 17:22:56

No cash either way, ever. But lots of goodies and gifts and help to prepare food etc .

Norah Wed 23-Nov-22 17:40:04

AreWeThereYet I should say though that it does depend though on the financial circumstances of your own family - if you know they would appreciate the money to help them out, for instance.

Agreed. We've a feel for our daughters' finances.

We help any way we can, not just holidays, all year.

All families are different to others.

Katie59 Wed 23-Nov-22 19:31:45

Would not dream of cash, wouldn’t be expected either, just take lots of presents and goodies vouchers if you want. Take them out one evening too.

Marydoll Wed 23-Nov-22 19:34:03

My children would never take payment. We always go laden with goodies and gifts.

Also if I was hosting, I would never expect payment.