Where are you from? Is it an insult?

GagaJo

DaisyAnne

icanhandthemback

This is quite a shocking thread. Paint charts for the colour of the skin, a deliberate misunderstanding that this was not an innocent, "where are you from?" question but a sustained onslaught of the same question even when the question was answered, judgements about clothing and hair being over her badge, etc, etc. Honestly, it seems that educating people about racism has failed badly judging by this thread.

It is a shocking thread. How do people like you know it happened as you are saying. Because the complainant said so. No other information is available.

And this complainant is a very wealthy 57-year-old women who runs her own charity for people who have suffered from domestic violence. It is really unlikely that she has not had to cope with difficult situation before and, where necessary, walked away if it is too difficult.

This is shocking because no one's word should be accepted and lose someone their job without a proper process.

1) There was a witness.

2) The lady who forced the situation has admitted the conversation was difficult.

3) The complainant is 61.

4) If you choose to believe some GN members, there is a recording of the conversation, because the victim was wearing a wire (this is wacky, I accept this one isn't true).

5) The royal family have a problem with racism.

Not a huge leap really, is it? They (as in the RF) need to get together as a group and weed out any elements that aren't fully on board with Britain being a multicultural nation.

So, you don't fact-check before you declare what you say is the truth Gagajo. Why are you lying about her age while telling others they have got it wrong? She was born in 1965. If you haven't checked that, what else haven't you checked? Why should anyone believe what you say when you are inaccurate?

Who was the witness? What relationship does she have with the complainant? Are their politics in sync? This brouhaha is all about politics, so you need to know that.

No one knows if there is a recording, so why offer it as evidence? In either case, it doesn't help. If there is one, then the bias towards political stirring is obvious. If there isn't, then no one is capable of remembering a conversation verbatim, so her report on what was said carries small weight, unless, like the PM before PMQs, she practised the answers to the questions previously, of course.

Your number five is just an opinion. Depending on how political you are getting I expect everyone has a problem with racism. Isn't that the point of the extremists such as the complainant? It is political stirring and very destructive of the moves to improve race relations. Any extreme destroys the good.

If you forget about proving the truth, then yes, your conspiracy theory makes sense. Lucky the truth matters to others, isn't it.

Esspee

So if you are experiencing domestic violence and are shade X on the British standard colour chart But are not of African or West Indian heritage her lot won't help you?
Is that right?

Madgran77. The British standard paint colour chart was in reference to the above. It is not a charity available to all women and I was simply asking how/where they draw the line?

If someone started a charity exclusively for people with pale skin would that be OK? No it would not.

What if you are south Indian?

From what I read, the lady resigned, she wasn't sacked. According to the Guardian, the palace described the remarks as “unacceptable and deeply regretable”. A spokesperson for Prince William said “racism has no place in our society”. That would give more than a vague hint that this happened as the complainant said. The Guardian also went on to say, "The incident on Tuesday, at a reception on gender-based violence, was witnessed by Mandu Reid, the leader of the Women’s Equality party, and another charity representative." In other words more than one witness.

It is really unlikely that she has not had to cope with difficult situation before and, where necessary, walked away if it is too difficult.

So, if you encounter a racist situation, you are suspected to walk away. The complainant pointed out how shocked she was at the persistence and actually tried to deflect.

Would you actually call yourself "Racially sensitive", DaisyAnne? It certainly doesn't sound like it from what you've said so far. Isn't that the point of the extremists such as the complainant?. Just gob smacking.

I would call myself probing the problem and you someone who needs to be really careful what they call other people icanhandthemback

The Palace will have put out the PR they need to put out. They may have believed it, or they may not. We do not know. Just like everything else to do with this.

All we know is that two people talked to one another. One gave a so far unsubstantiated report to the press. The other resigned.

Extremists in politics are dangerous in my opinion. Whether they be right-wing extremists, left-wing extremists or those who support single issue extremist groups. You do not have to agree with me, but you can at least accept your own bias and not be insulting about those who do not share it.

Espee The British standard paint colour chart was in reference to the above. It is not a charity available to all women and I was simply asking how/where they draw the line?

It is still inappropriate. They are not defining on skin colour but on cultural heritage as in "African and Carribbean Heritage Women affected by Domestic Abuse"

One may agree or disagree with that specific defining of who they support but it is most definitely not a definition based on skin colour and how dark or light one's skin is.

The paint chart is irrelevant and that is the least of it

I am asked often where I am from. I moved to the north west 3 years ago and come from black country area of the west midlands. I am white but it's my accent they pick up on. Thank goodness no thinks I am a Brummie 😁.

Lots of people ask that question here all the time. Colour makes no difference whatsoever . I think ethnic backgrounds are fascinating and I would never be ashamed of mine and I am pretty sure my friends of Asian and African ethnicity are proud of theirs,too. The church I used to attend was extremely proud that they had people from53 different ethnic origins and we used to fly flags from each individual country once a year and have a big scrumptious dinner with dishes from most of the countries. They even got bangers and mash from me once and my other half produced Lancashire hotpot.

Madgran77

Espee The British standard paint colour chart was in reference to the above. It is not a charity available to all women and I was simply asking how/where they draw the line?

It is still inappropriate. They are not defining on skin colour but on cultural heritage as in "African and Carribbean Heritage Women affected by Domestic Abuse"

One may agree or disagree with that specific defining of who they support but it is most definitely not a definition based on skin colour and how dark or light one's skin is.

The paint chart is irrelevant and that is the least of it

Blimey , I'm shocked. Imagine a charity for ' abused white women who have lived in Europe' check the colour of your skin here. Or do I need a tin hat here

A reality check is what you need, not a tin hat.

Isn't about time someone starts claiming 'All lives matter'? We must be nearly at that point.

Yes all our lives do matter whatever our colour race or religion we are all here in the flesh.

Gagojo

Isn't about time someone starts claiming 'All lives matter'? We must be nearly at that point.

More to the point isn’t it about time you realised that ALL lives do matter?!?

Bingo!!!

Blimey , I'm shocked. Imagine a charity for ' abused white women who have lived in Europe' check the colour of your skin here. Or do I need a tin hat here

Why imagine that when in fact no charity being discussed does have entry criteria based on skin colour as opposed to cultural heritage.

tickingbird

Gagojo

Isn't about time someone starts claiming 'All lives matter'? We must be nearly at that point.

More to the point isn’t it about time you realised that ALL lives do matter?!?

'All Lives Matter' is an extreme right-wing group, promoting violence against people of colour. They're borderline Nazi.

Own goal.

"Black Lives Matter" is not actually about saying that , for instance,White Lives , don't matter. It is a response as a title to the disproportionate number of police "events" leading to the death of black people, men in particular, in America and historically, the lack of social/political will to do anything about it!

tickingbird

Gagojo

Isn't about time someone starts claiming 'All lives matter'? We must be nearly at that point.

More to the point isn’t it about time you realised that ALL lives do matter?!?

And even more to the point is that while all lives certainly matter, and we must have laws to ensure they do, we will all be offended at some point. Asking for that to be different for a certain group is surely racist in itself. It is certainly not equality.

Being offended is something we all have to live with. I don't know what offends you and you don't know what offends me.

Being harangued and subjected to different treatment because of our skin colour and hairstyle? Not so much.

Being made to feel that you don't belong in a certain place or country by a person who is perceived to have power, isn't being "offended".

nanna8

Lots of people ask that question here all the time. Colour makes no difference whatsoever . I think ethnic backgrounds are fascinating and I would never be ashamed of mine and I am pretty sure my friends of Asian and African ethnicity are proud of theirs,too. The church I used to attend was extremely proud that they had people from53 different ethnic origins and we used to fly flags from each individual country once a year and have a big scrumptious dinner with dishes from most of the countries. They even got bangers and mash from me once and my other half produced Lancashire hotpot.

Lots of people ask that question here all the time

I mentioned that too, nanna8
In fact, it's usually an introductory topic of conversation in Australia.

"The incident on Tuesday, at a reception on gender-based violence

The incident on Tuesday, at a reception on gender-based violence

THE INCIDENT on TUESDAY, at a reception ON GENDER-BASED VIOLENCE

It's worth reminding everyone that the reception was intended to focus on worldwide violence against women and children, many of whom are suffering abuse as I post this.

I just wonder why you think someone resigned if there was no truth to this DaisyAnne? The Palace are also able to put out PR that is bland and without apology. They even have investigations where nobody gets to know the truth but in this case it was an instant apology.

Ngozi Fulani may be an intense lady but why would you call her an extremist?

Incidentally, I didn't call you anything, I asked you a direct question which you haven't answered. If you asked me the same question, I would answer that I try to be but recognise that as a white person, growing up and living in a predominantly white are, it is difficult for me to understand where someone who meets racism on a daily basis is coming from. However, I try not to be dismissive of the racism they meet no matter how innocuous the giver of it thought they were being.

icanhandthemback

I just wonder why you think someone resigned if there was no truth to this DaisyAnne? The Palace are also able to put out PR that is bland and without apology. They even have investigations where nobody gets to know the truth but in this case it was an instant apology.

Ngozi Fulani may be an intense lady but why would you call her an extremist?

Incidentally, I didn't call you anything, I asked you a direct question which you haven't answered. If you asked me the same question, I would answer that I try to be but recognise that as a white person, growing up and living in a predominantly white are, it is difficult for me to understand where someone who meets racism on a daily basis is coming from. However, I try not to be dismissive of the racism they meet no matter how innocuous the giver of it thought they were being.

I answered it immediately after your implicitly accusative question icanhandthemback

Actually, DaisyAnne, you didn't. Telling me you are probing is not an answer to that question. Nor did you answer my questions in my second post which implied nothing beyond a interest in why you would think this lady is an "extremist".

I do abhor racism and discrimination in any form and I also wonder why those of Royal blood are not designated a minority group. I see a huge amount of abuse publicly directed toward them, constant intrusive invasion of privacy suffered by them. They were born this way and the only way out doesn't seem to work either.

I'm quite saddened that people don't listen. There is nothing to be offended about. Lots of groups and charities exist to support people in minority groups (for whatever reason) because minority groups often have a unique set of circumstances that require focussed support for those needs. This could cover a whole range of issues. Why people are affronted that a charity exists that helps and supports women who are black who face violence and abuse, honestly astounds me.