You are a Burglar

The last digit from all the numbers in the phone book.

Haha thanks Janet. I have to admit that if I was a burglar I would probably be a selfish one.

I already crept in and stole all the coffee because it was more important than food

Pillows and cushions.

Slippers and keys

One leg from each table.

The lid of the teapot.

The kettle, the car keys, all the cutlery.

DhFavourite thin cushion, his old gloves, glasses with one arm.

I can't help laughing at how many people would burgle their husbands

I can just see it now, head to toe black, creeping through the kitchen, forward roll across the living room... grabbing the TV remote, then diving through the window before jumping the fence

Coins
Toothbrush
Toilet Roll
Mirror

It's the second time i've robbed this week ha ha...

If I was a mean burglar I would put prawns in the curtain poles and put grass or cress seed on the carpets and water it.

All the spectacles in the house! Tee, hee, hee,

interesting topic, the things that some of you think would only cause slight inconvenience would seriously inconvenience me.

hmm....two steak plates[like rocking horse sht to source]
small food processor that slices chops etc but compact!
any loose change left openly out[car park while i burgle]
and.....any new looking boots size 6?

The labels from all the canned food 🥫

Rosina

*downtoearth*!! You are a sadist! (But how inventive)
I'd cut the plugs off everything and take them away.

The first house I purchased with my DH was acquired from a divorcing couple and suffice to say it was not amicable.

On moving in day, we found that all the TV aerial cables had the ends cut off and also the lids of all the bins had been taken away!

I'd remove just one slipper from each pair……

BeverleyJB, the woman we bought our house from decades ago, was so incensed with dh for negotiating the price down, she took all the screwed in curtain rails down, plus virtually every light bulb out. Even though she knew I’d be moving in on my own with a very young baby, and I’d allowed her to stay 4 days after completion, since her next, bigger house, wasn’t ready.
My solicitor had a pink fit!

She had been in a hurry to move, and knew that dh was working in the Middle East at the time - her reaction to his reasonable enough offer was, ‘You are not in an Arab marketplace now!’ (Pls imagine a German accent.)
He said, ‘Well, take it or leave it.’
She took, and evidently seethed!

How awful Witzend! Particularly as the vendor must have known your personal circumstances.

At least we knew that it was one of the divorcing couple (each one moved out of the property at different times) trying to inconvenience the other rather than an attack on us personally, but still very petty. We still have a “spare” dustbin with no lid so we had the last laugh so to speak!

Every second slat from a bed base.

The wire rack from the grill pan.

narrowboatnan

The labels from all the canned food 🥫

Oo genius idea

I had a friend once whose husband worked at Heinz. He often brought unlabelled tins home. After a while she was quite good with guessing the contents. ….by the sound when she shook them .

VioletSky

narrowboatnan

The labels from all the canned food 🥫

Oo genius idea

It would keep things interesting I suppose but meal planning would be hard.

Nothing like opening a tin of peaches when you're trying to make bolognese and wanted tomatoes

All the calendars.

Lampshades.

All the cutlery… and TV remote

The clothes pegs.

The address book.

The spare hangers

So they can't hang up the clothes fresh out the wash