I am not a people pleaser and never have been. The women in my childhood, mother, grandmother, aunts, were not overtly feminist, but two generations had been widowed in their 30s so had to work to support their families and 2 never married but had good careers, one, a nurse headed the nursing school at a big London hospital, the other became a civil servant and reached a managerial level.
I was brought up to believe that men and women were each other's equals and that every woman needed to be able to earn their own living because, you never knew when you might need to be the family wage earner. I and my sisters were encouraged to get a good education, we all made it to university and then encouraged into 'safe' professions with good pensions, my mother was less successful in that!
It has never occurred to me, whatever company I am in, not to speak up for myself and others. Certainly I have never kowtowed to a man because they were male..
This did not mean that I was not brought up to be polite and well mannered and to dress nicely. None of those advantages stop you speaking up and making yourself heard. In fact they are very useful habits to have.
