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Fake profiles and accounts

(41 Posts)
VioletSky Sun 19-Feb-23 20:55:07

I was just thinking

What are peoples thoughts on someone you are estranged from setting up multiple accounts when you have blocked them repeatedly?

Or what are your thoughts on someone posing as someone else in order to say unkind things to you?

My mother frequently sets up new accounts to try to contact me or my children and has also used the accounts of others to say things when her typing style remained the same and it was obvious.

Yet there doesn't seem to be much legal defence against this? Because social media accounts are in the public domain sò it's not technically stalking and there doesn't seem to be any rules regarding people having multiple accounts.

But morally, what do you think about people who do this?

My situation as an example, but this is a general discussion!

Blossoming Sun 19-Feb-23 21:21:30

The situation you describe sounds like stalking or bullying to me. I think it’s morally wrong but I don’t know if you’d get the SM companies to do anything about it. I have multiple accounts on Facebook as I run a page and a group for a charity. My personal profile is very private and I don’t accept random friend requests from people I don’t know.

AreWeThereYet Sun 19-Feb-23 21:31:22

Cyber stalking is illegal and people have been prosecuted.

Google says

'Online harassment and stalking is illegal in England and Wales. Stalking is different from harassment as it involves fixation and includes repeated attempts to contact a person without permission in a way that could be expected to cause distress or fear.'

Only close friends and family have access to my FB. Even if I fell out with one of them I don't think any of them would allow someone to use their account to harass me. Most social media sites have tightened up on privacy these days - if settings are correct it doesn't matter how many accounts someone sets up they won't have access.

Smileless2012 Sun 19-Feb-23 22:20:47

My personal profile is very private and I don't accept random friendship requests from people I don't know. I don't do FB but that's what Mr. S. does Blossoming.

biglouis Sun 19-Feb-23 22:31:10

I have both personal and business accounts on Facebook and there is no connection between them. I am also very careful on discussion forums not to give out information which would enable anyone to identify my business name or shops. I have very strong views on some subjects and prefer to keep business and personal life separate. People can be very vindictive.

Many years ago I was on an eBay discussion forum with a member who was posting with his selling ID. He did not say anthing contentious but was unwise enough to admit that he ran a debt collection agency. His auctions were bombed by others and it caused him no end of hassle. and money If you have an unpopular occupation or views its not wise to reveal your ID on a public forum.

lyleLyle Mon 20-Feb-23 17:30:38

I think that when this happens with someone you know, all legal options should be explored as it can turn into a dangerous situation.

It happens with strangers as well, but this is why it is important to keep your personally identifying information off of sites like gransnet. If you use more traditional social media (FB, IG etc), educate yourself on the app’s privacy settings and adjust your profile accordingly. You can always report suspicious behavior to the app/site’s administrators, but results will be hit or miss. Unfortunately you’ll likely end up having to block the person each time. I’d still report each time.

When a person feels the need to create multiple accounts in order to harass a someone online, that individual has serious mental health issues. There is no telling what else they are capable of.

VioletSky Mon 20-Feb-23 17:37:53

Thankfully we live far apart now

At the beginning we actually had to leave my husbands old car on the drive way so she wouldn't think I was alone at home

nexus63 Mon 20-Feb-23 17:44:51

i use facebook to keep in touch with family and a couple of friends, i am always asked if i want to accept a friend before they can post anything and unless it is someone i know then the answer is always no thanks. if i see adverts i just block them, i don't know what it is like on other sites,

Forlornhope Mon 20-Feb-23 17:45:52

The devil makes work for idle hands. These folk need to find something more useful to do.

lyleLyle Mon 20-Feb-23 17:46:55

Wow. I am really sorry you had to experience that, VioletSky. I’m glad you’ve at least managed to gain physical distance. Few things feel worse than being made to feel uncomfortable or unsafe in your own personal space. The internet is an entirely different ball game, unfortunately. As much as it can bring you happily closer to others, the anonymity can make it easier for those with ill intent to get within some reach of us. I wish there were more lasting resolutions to the issue of cyber-bullying. It’s definitely a complex issue.

GrammyGrammy Mon 20-Feb-23 17:50:24

Morally? I think it worse than physical murder to deprive a loving grandmother of her grandchildren. Unless there is sexual or physical abuse then to absolutely deprive the children of having a grandma is evil beyond belief. I sympathise with any grandparent desperate to have a peek of their family to know they are safe and doing ok.

VioletSky Mon 20-Feb-23 19:01:23

That's an interesting perspective Grammy, thanks for sharing

Norah Mon 20-Feb-23 20:05:40

Message deleted by Gransnet. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

JaneJudge Mon 20-Feb-23 20:13:16

I know of people who set up groups on facebook in order to attack people because they are 'passionate' about something and I don;t understand why this is tolerated in law

JaneJudge Mon 20-Feb-23 20:13:51

they set them up faceless/anonymous and tell lies about where they live and its usually about something they don;t even live near to anymore

VioletSky Mon 20-Feb-23 20:28:21

It's a bit sinister as well when they want the person they are stalking to know, its not even quietly looking and hoping for a glimpse into someone life...

Very controlling and aggressive

M0nica Mon 20-Feb-23 20:30:22

GrammyGrammy I can think of not one good reason why grandparents should have any right to see grandchildren.

Being a grandparent does not automarically make you a kind and loving person who is safe around young children and by limiting your definition of abuse to physical and sexual at a time like now when coercive control of another person is recognise as a crime is bizarre in the extreme.

It also shows little understanding of the complications of what happens in toxic relationships. The one thing the coercer in a coercive or toxic relationship will always say is how much they love the person who they are trying to destroy.

Allsorts Mon 20-Feb-23 21:13:44

I think this woman has real mental health issues, which is sad. . It’s not rational, I couldn’t bring myself to go to a solicitor about my own mother. I would not respond, however many times she tries. She sounds very lonely and desperate but if you have tried everything to help in the past and nothing changes what else can you do?

Norah Mon 20-Feb-23 21:29:05


Morally? I think it worse than physical murder to deprive a loving grandmother of her grandchildren. Unless there is sexual or physical abuse then to absolutely deprive the children of having a grandma is evil beyond belief. I sympathise with any grandparent desperate to have a peek of their family to know they are safe and doing ok.


Adult parents have no right to decide who their own children interact with? GP can only be "deprived" GC for sexual or physical abuse? How would that work? What about being toxic people or trying to destroy the marriage of the AC?

I suppose GP should send in flying monkeys to talk for them?

I disagree, completely, with your post!!!

MawtheMerrier Mon 20-Feb-23 22:59:15

When I saw this thread title my immediate thought was of the threads which have recently disappeared after a very short lifespan. Somebody at HQ seems to be on the qui viive at identifying “dodgy” accounts/usernames hmm

nanna8 Tue 21-Feb-23 07:52:19

I think it is sly and dishonest to hide behind a different person as in the original post. I think it isn’t really too good to change identities on forums like this, either. You wonder why - easy to pick anyway.

Quokka Tue 21-Feb-23 08:00:47

Message deleted by Gransnet. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

25Avalon Tue 21-Feb-23 08:20:38

Is it a fake account or an anonymous account? On GN it’s anonymous and provided you are careful with postings it remains so. That doesn’t mean a poster can’t be unkind to you but you can report it and some will stand up for you.

If you block someone they should not be able to access your fb account. I do What’s App which can block numbers and on group act only certain people are invited.On Twitter I use a pseudonym so I can’t be positively identified.

So tbh I don’t really see the problem with social media if you use it carefully or even not at all. If someone sets up multiple accounts I don’t see how it helps them access your private account. Perhaps VS you are being a bit paranoid but not without good reason. Keeping away from toxic situations is not easy and the fact you have to from your own mother can only make it worse.

eazybee Tue 21-Feb-23 08:43:27

I think it is extremely sad when grandparents are de[rived of all contact with their grandchildren. I have seen this happen with two close friends whose daughters in law caused the division but their husbands, the sons, initially supported their wives, although eventually they did arrange for them to see the grandchildren. The usual story is that the grandchildren made their own decision but in the two cases I saw the children were all fond of their grandmothers and couldn't understand why they were suddenly deprived of their company.
But as has been said, only one side of the story is available, and the estrangement isn't our business.

VioletSky Tue 21-Feb-23 11:48:09

We are respectful of our children's needs and wishes in our home, none of them want a relationship with her.

So I'm afraid it doesn't matter how she feels as they are my priority

And they don't want any contact from her and do not like it when she sets up another profile and messages them or tries to add them as a friend

She has no right to my children they have their own rights