Feeling alone

Fae1

See your GP. That's the place to share this not on a gransnet forum. They can offer you professional help.

Sorry ignore the first one I cant deleated I sent an un spell checked one.
I a widow too not as long as you, but I am more than happy for others to share their pain and sadness on here. I would never meet it with such dismissive harsh words as those quoted above. I am not sure what you bad news is or weather it warrants a doctor or indeed professional advice or just a empathic ear. I am always on the end of a message should you wish to share to a Stanger, a little kindness and understanding go a long way. Sending you a hug. Ignore harsh words and post where ever you want.

Beckett - so sorry you’re feeling like this. You obviously have no family that you can turn. How about friends/ neighbours ? You really shouldn’t be on your own if you have just had bad news. Just knock on your neighbour’s door.
Late one night, I was so desperate, because my husband was with his mistress (we were in the middle of separating), I actually called the Samaritans. I knew I wouldn’t do anything silly because I had young children sleeping in their rooms. But they kept chatting to me and I felt so much better .

I’m really sorry you’re feeling so low, sharing on here is a good starting point and most people have made good suggestions. You come back on here as much as you like if it helps and I hope things feel much better soon

I understand how you feel. Widowed 32 years and very self sufficient, of late I find myself overcome with loneliness. Perhaps aging has something to do with it, tasks are harder and family and friends are becoming fewer. When I get bad news I talk to my husband and although he can’t answer I feel as though it helps. I have tried every hobby going, solitary or in a group but still feel alone. Some days are better than others, getting out for a walk really helps. If you were in my area we could walk together and perhaps find we could become friends. Here is a big virtual hug.

I go to U3A classes and love them. Sadly U3A is losing members/ need new members or they might cancel all these lovely activities. I need this lifeline to avoid loneliness. Otherwise I will have to rejoin local gym... Oh no!

Nicolenet

I go to U3A classes and love them. Sadly U3A is losing members/ need new members or they might cancel all these lovely activities. I need this lifeline to avoid loneliness. Otherwise I will have to rejoin local gym... Oh no!

WEA is great too. Have a rummage on their website.

Have a virtual hug from me 🤗. We all have those times when things overwhelm us and we feel sad and lonely. People on here have given some excellent tips and advice I hope it helps. I find watching a favourite film, a good book or having an outing (even to the supermarket) if you are able helps me the short term at least. Meanwhile please post again if you still feel down.

Ah Beckett if you were close to me (S Cotswolds) I would be happy to give you a hug and try to help. Support is one of the things a forum like this should offer
Fael I find your words harsh and unhelpful. What is the point of going to the GP? Even if you can get an appointment you'll be offered nothing but drugs and, as one poster said, a telephone number - at the end of which there will quite probably be a two month backlog. The one resource you might find with your GP is a Social Prescriber (if they have one) who could suggest groups and organisation that may help. In an emergency do call the Samaritans. Also, there should be a counselling service close to you, offering counselling hopefully at affordable rates. Reach out and I'm sure you will find someone who will be only too happy to help. Love to you.

So sorry to read of your sadness, please keep posting on here ,many have had great support and help during what were very dark hours.

Fael that is rather an unkind thing to say to anyone, kindness and compassion are what we all need when we feel alone or troubled. Medication can sometimes have a place when anxiety and depression intrude on our lives but reaching out takes courage and this dear lady found that courage to ask for help.
I hope that we are all capable of sending her our best wishes for her life to feel calm and positive once more and that those very lonely feelings will gradually fade into an acceptance of her loss. Her loved one will stay in her heart and her head forever.

...and hey...you aren't the only one....loneliness is an absolute plague nowadays. I last had a proper hug six years ago now. Go out and about and chat to people and make some connections locally....you got this...

Beckett, I'm really sorry you're feeing so lonely right now, and I think you've definitely done the right thing by letting other gransnetters know you're in need of advice. Depending on where you live your GP may be the person to visit or not, as the offer of 10 sessions of counselling on the NHS can be accessed directly in some councils/boroughs. So check how it operates where you are. You may be able to self-refer to the Talking Therapy Service and by-pass your GP. But however you do this, seeking out counselling sessions is a good place to start. You've been living life by yourself for a good number of years now so it's clear that you're a resilient person and it may just be that the need for counselling is temporary. One thing you're unlikely to get from a professional counsellor however is a real hug - as a psychotherapist I know that - so if you genuinely want that closeness then I guess it's a question of reaching out to your friends and perhaps looking at your lifestyle to see if you can make new friends who might be supportive in the years to come. Good luck.

I have been through this. I find the best way through it is to look after your own interests whatever those are, and look after your dog.

Over eating is not looking after your own interests. You need good food and plenty of it.

Sleep and rest and also physical exercise is looking after your own interests.

These are the basics. Your bad news may be bereavement, relationship loss, or financial loss. Whatever your loss is , you need to look after your interests, and the very act of knowing you are doing so will improve your mood and make you feel better.

Such good advice from everyone , but one. We all send you our love and best wishes. None of us know what is around the corner for any of us, to get support on GN is a great start.

I agree with the suggestion that you need to look after your own interests - you need self compassion and you don't seem to have fallen into self compassion's shadow, which is self pity, which does not help. As well as looking after yourself and your health with loving kindness , it does seem that doing kind things for others can help both them and yourself. I send you another hug to join all those already sent to you!

Hi Beckett
Sorry to hear you're feeling sad and lonely after hearing your bad news.
It must have been a shock to you and naturally you want to share it with someone close.
However, as the days pass you will learn to come to terms with the situation and will develop your own coping mechanisms.
There are many organisations that are ready yo help us in time of need. I'm sure you can find one that is relevant to your specific situation.
I hope you find comfort in the weeks ahead from a friend or neighbour perhaps.
Am sending you flowers and hugs.
Stay strong and look after yourself.

Fael. I have been able to see my actual GP face to face only once in the last six years. In fact not any doctor in the practice. There are telephone conversations and home visits from a paramedic.

I put a message on here ,probably about two years ago and I had some wonderful replies and great ideas about not feeling lonely.I think it’s very difficult when we are on our own.I would love to chat/grumble/ laugh with my DH. I miss him so much.I
am doing charity work,go into school to listen to readers and I go to the gym. I have met some lovely new friends.A big hug coming from me .x

Just glancing through different posts, saw Faels unkind comment., I and so many widows feel incredibly lonely at times, no support or anyone to chat things over with, if you didn’t get down ever you would be an old fish. Beckett is perfectly entitled to post on her and we welcome her, what good is a five minute chat with a doctor over the phone. Please think you are talking to a person who feels low better say nothing than hurt someone.
Beckett I hope you’re feeling bit better now, please message me for a chat if you want to.

Hello Beckett, I very rarely post anything on GN but your post really touched me. I am so sorry you are feeling alone and sad.
However, it made me realise how lucky I am to have a husband, family and friends who I know would give me support if I needed help.
So in a roundabout way you have helped me through your post....thank you.
But your post is not about me it is about you
There are so many lovely members on this site who will gladly offer you comfort and 'listen'...myself included.
I got a lot of support and advice on one of the health forums and I will always be gratetful for that.
Sending you lots of caring thoughts and I hope things improve for you...x

Sorry to hear you're feeling down. I just wondered if this would be any help. www.oddfellows.co.uk. it's a nationwide company, their byline is 'Making friends, helping people '.
It might not be your kind of thing but you never know, it may be worth a look. I haven't used them myself but I have heard they're very good.
Take care.

Sorry your feeling sad. I think its very brave of you to share how your feeling with everyone, I'm sure you'll take solace in the fact that lots of us grans are here to listen and offer supportive words and hugs. Silver Line sounds like a good place to start if you feel you can reach out and speak to someone. Sending a big hug. Xxx

How unkind of you *Fael. Gransnet is here for the very purpose of uniting people , whatever the reason 🤫

I think we all have those lonely moments Beckett. Even when surrounded by people . You have definitely come to the right place for some understanding , lovely people with who to share those feelings .
Hope you find comfort from all the love & hugs coming your way xxx

Fae1

See your GP. That's the place to share this not on a gransnet forum. They can offer you professional help.

Why does the OP need professional help? Who says the OP can't share her feelings on here? What can the GP do for loneliness? Offer companionship? A listening ear in ten minutes? Some pills? As my late mother said 'Here go I but for the grace of God'. OP share and share away. There are some very nice people on this Gransnet who will support and offer a metaphoric cuppa and a hug. If you can't share here, then where can you share?!