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Should I stay or should I go???

(33 Posts)
travelsafar Fri 24-Feb-23 17:36:06

Have the chance to do house exchange from my 3 bed to a nearly new 2 bed flat with wrap around balcony....its on the corner of a 3 storey high. It runs parallel to the block where my DD lives with the same street name and postcode. If I decide to go it means leaving my beloved sister behind in the town we both live in. She has a partner and her daughter also lives here. I just feel guilty that I'm even contemplating this move. My Sister and I meet every Saturday morning and when she has time of work we see each other. I'd be moving 30mins drive away to next town which is OK while we both can drive so our meet up could continue. I know when she retires in a couple of years she has said she'd be round every day and we could do things together I feel I'm betraying her but my daughter wants me nearer to her so as I age she can help me. What would you do???

travelsafar Wed 01-Mar-23 21:31:29

Thank you all for the words if comfort. I love my sister dearly she was a great support when my husband died and I will never forget that. I guess that why I feel so guilty. She comes to.mine every Saturday at the moment for breakfast and a catchup so this weekend I will speak to her about it all and hopefully be able reassure her that I will still be there for her and we can take it in turns to meet on Saturdays even meeting half way for breakfast or coffee. I know she would hate to think I feel the way I am, she is a good kind person and i guess it has come as a shock to her.

cornergran Wed 01-Mar-23 22:21:58

So hard travelsafar. As you and your sister are so close I’m sure she’ll come to understand you must do the right thing for yourself which doesn’t mean she’s excluded or loved any less. Your meetings can still happen, just be different. Different doesn’t have to be worse, it’s just a change to adapt to. Wishing you well for Saturday. Good luck.

BlueBelle Wed 01-Mar-23 22:30:46

Well you can only live for you you can’t please both the others
Your sister has a husband and daughter with her why would she be so distraught about a thirty minute distance between you good grief you re not going to NZ
30 mins is nothing I think families can sometimes be too much in each others pockets I can’t really understand her upset at all it’s not understandable, how many people live within 30 minutes of their sisters ?
Go where you want to go and if it’s not near either that s good too both will get used to your decision

gulligranny Thu 02-Mar-23 14:54:36

The flat with wraparound balcony near your DD sounds perfect, and as others have said it's not the other end of the world. Your sister has her family around and will be lucky enough to have you within a 30 minute drive. Go for it, and enjoy it - you are the important one here and your sister will surely not risk losing you by being so selfish about what is a good move for you.

Good luck and lots of happiness in your new home!

Hithere Thu 02-Mar-23 17:58:46

Op

What if daughter moves?

HeavenLeigh Thu 02-Mar-23 20:34:43

I think your sister is being selfish she’s thinking of herself here and not about your needs, if a house became too much for me I’d go to a flat as long as it suited me, please think about what you need to do for yourself

Shel69 Fri 03-Mar-23 11:15:16

Move if you like it, you can still meet up with your sister, you will have your daughter nearby as she has hers