Come in trisher!

I just don't understand how 5 or 6 random posters who, on the first page, casually and harmlessly mentioned trisher's whereabouts on GN under a new name, can be held responsible for the thread's degeneration? Not only that, but that they do this frequently?

There is room.for everyone's feelings

It's always possible that people are stating how they genuinely feel

It's up to the individual if they listen and moderate their own behaviour or would rather... whatever it is in the responses

Throwing a strop when you don't get an answer in an anonymous online forum is ridiculous.

Getting nasty about it is bullying.

By all means disagree. I'm not bothered either way.

I definitely do not have all the answers

I thought looking for them was the point in some discussions

Joseanne

I just don't understand how 5 or 6 random posters who, on the first page, casually and harmlessly mentioned trisher's whereabouts on GN under a new name, can be held responsible for the thread's degeneration? Not only that, but that they do this frequently?

You’re not alone Joseanne, I’ve got no idea what this is all about now either.

GagaJo

Throwing a strop when you don't get an answer in an anonymous online forum is ridiculous.

Getting nasty about it is bullying.

By all means disagree. I'm not bothered either way.

Dismissing someone’s questions as ‘throwing a strop’ could also be perceived as bullying - it’s certainly further along that road than disagreeing with a point of view.

For someone who’s ‘not bothered’ you have certainly remembered for some time. I can’t remember the last trans thread I posted on, as this sort of gaslighting happens every time, and it’s undignified.

Joseanne

I just don't understand how 5 or 6 random posters who, on the first page, casually and harmlessly mentioned trisher's whereabouts on GN under a new name, can be held responsible for the thread's degeneration? Not only that, but that they do this frequently?

No, Joseanne, nor do I. But this sort of thing (false accusations, condescending lectures on kindness, snide comments) is why I am posting less these days. It’s so disingenuous and so tiresome.

Totally agree. Undignified. I couldn't agree more.

GagaJo

Throwing a strop when you don't get an answer in an anonymous online forum is ridiculous.

Getting nasty about it is bullying.

By all means disagree. I'm not bothered either way.

This thread has gone bonkers.

Surely it depends on the subject in question. If we are discussing a very important issue, which has massive repercussions on all or some of us- and someone makes sweeping statements which are clear nonsense or even lies- it is neither throwing a strop, nasty or bullying, to ask for evidence or official links.

Leave you to it.

I like all of you. I think everyone has valid points 🍺

JaneJudge

I like all of you. I think everyone has valid points 🍺

💗

We can all do better

The type of questions I'm referring to Fleurpepper, have been aggressive, leading, antagonistic. Not genuine requests for information. I don't want to go into more detail because it'll be a thread about a thread etc.

I smile because I have no idea what’s going on …..😀

GagaJo

The type of questions I'm referring to Fleurpepper, have been aggressive, leading, antagonistic. Not genuine requests for information. I don't want to go into more detail because it'll be a thread about a thread etc.

I would, of course, dispute that. I am well aware that there is a diametrically opposed view on whether men can become women by saying so. I don’t understand it, and see (or, perhaps naively, saw) threads on a discussion forum as a good place to ask those with those views why they hold them, and how they square what is, to me, an obvious circle.

I can’t see why that is any of the things you claim. How can there be leading questions on something like this? Either you understand why you think as you do, or you don’t. Similarly a question on why a male-born person should be allowed in a female space if he says he’s a woman, but not if he doesn’t is not ‘antagonistic’. Incredulous perhaps. I just want to understand the rationale, as I simply don’t ‘get it’.

Well, if trisher has returned with another username, I should think she's steering well clear of this thread!

😀

Well my summary is:

Trans threads suck

They are completely horrible place to be

Most avoid them like the plague and its just groundhog day with the same old names

I have utterly given up on ever getting my voice actually heard there or taking part in anything resembling a reasonable debate or any kind of solution based thinking that doesn't involve thousands of people just shutting up and going away

It's a tough one

I'd like to see them change for the better some of the issues I agree with and think need better handling by organisations, those in charge of sports and those in charge of public and private spaces, I just can't see the loguc of blaming someone who just wants somewhere to pee or try on a dress and I vant see the logic of targeting trans women in what is supposed to be a fight for equality

If trisher is still fighting the good fight, I'm glad to know

If that is a summary of this thread, it’s clear that it wasn’t about a ‘missing’ poster at all, but a chance to have a go at people. I thought as much.

🙄🙄🙄 It was genuinely about my missing trisher. Jesus. Talk about wacko conspiracy theories.

I'm sorry she left is all. I liked her.

It wasn't me who posted a link to one of those threads and a specific page on that thread with whatever is supposed to be taken from the comments there. I didn't introduce the topic but it became obvious after that what a lot of people were talking about.

Genuinely do not think Gagajo would do that and if you read the thread again, you can see for yourself

I

I don’t think it was started to have a go, but the answer to ‘where is trisher’ was given on page one, yet the whole thing was dragged out with lols and incomprehensible posts, ‘ignore me, I’m just reading through’ attention seeking, pop-psychology tripe about being nice, and so on. Those posts were not by GagaJo, but the accusations of bullying, daring to ask questions and so on were pretty evenly split between you.

My point is that if the thread was just to ask a question it would have ended with the answer.

I don't understand you sometimes doodledog

You seem very knowledgeable about certain kinds of behaviour and many pf your own comments on this thread mention certain kinds of behaviour you view as unacceptable

Yet when anyone (specifically those you disagree with on one subject, not those who have mentioned issues on other topics) mentions that they are struggling to engage in threads and finding them unpleasant and personal... you jump straight into attack and defend mode...

It's a huge disconnect for me that you are allowed to complain but myself and Gagajo are not.

I haven't once denied on this thread that you have seen things or experienced things you don't like, in fact I've actively shared that I would like things to improve and that I make effort not to engage in that way

So... I just don't get it, take a look at the forest around you, there is plenty of wood

Shinamae

I smile because I have no idea what’s going on …..😀

Me too.

I vaguely remember trisher, have no idea whether she’s still here, gone, come back, or has another name.

Mind you, I only get around two PMs a year, so I’m obviously not in any GN loop/group.

I see this is now probably about a totally unrelated issue involving trisher, VS, etc. about which I have no knowledge.
Like JaneJudge, I don't do confrontation, so I'm out.
And, for clarification, my comment about having a hit last was "joke", just that.

*hit list

People come and go from forums all the time. It's a transient thing.

They might find a forum they prefer, they might get fed up with one, they might have a lot going on (in real life), that takes over, or they might get bored...whatever.

Some never come back, some come back after a while, and some come back with a different user name.

The only problem is with trolls (as happened last year, on one section). that fly on, cause uproar, and then either get banned or disappear.🙄

It doesn't really matter, in the great scheme of things, but I can see why GN doesn't like these "where is x" threads....😗.