Typical Gransnetter

maddyone

Oh Lucca. I know she was very ill, does anyone know how she is now?

I am glad you mentioned Lucca, I have been wondering too. Last posts were from her in hospital I believe, and her DS was coming to visit. I do hope she is at home recuperating with her family.

Quite simply GN can be proud of the fact that it attracts such a diverse range of members and I have benfitted immensely from this diversity Totally agree, Monica.

I have no grandchildren, early retired ( or economically inactive as our delightful govt refer to me), married very suddenly in my early 30s, and have generally been happy with how life has treated me. Sometimes have a touch of the black dog and suspect I have passed this on to my darling son, but otherwise OK. I appreciate that I am fortunate in that there has been little tragedy in my life, appreciative, but not smug,

Callistemon21

Sara1954

Callistemon
It’s a bit unnerving to be told off by your peers, but then I thought, well who says they’re right and I’m wrong?, only them, possibly no one is right or wrong, just different opinions.
But I admit, I avoid anything too controversial.
I think the very first conversation I decided to join was about dogs in restaurants, was I ever put in my place.

Lunch boxes for me Sarah1954 😁

For me it was the estrangement mums furious because I never tell our daughters to ask their husbands (our SonsIL) why they have estranged. Why would we intrude on a private matter? We don't tell AC what to do, how to live.

I admit raising an eyebrow to wasteful spending - that's the extent of opinions (by me) advanced to fully functioning adults.

Much more recently, learning I'm the only ever sahm, foolish me.

Thinking about all my friends and colleagues, of similar age, we’ve all had our problems, some a lot more than others, but they don’t define us, one of our daughters has been a nightmare at times, but we’re still really close, we’ve had business worries, especially around covid, we’ve lost three out of four of our parents, we’ve got a disabled grandchild, I could go on, but you get the drift
But I still consider we’re fortunate, we have a nice home, three children, six grandchildren we see a lot of, still married, no life threatening illnesses, still working and generally enjoy life.
I absolutely do not feel smug, but I count my blessings.

Last week I asked if anyone had heard news of Lucca. No one came back with information so I sent a private message to Lucca.
Sadly, I've not heard anything from her, but the message 'sent'. Is anyone in contact with her?

Aldom

Last week I asked if anyone had heard news of Lucca. No one came back with information so I sent a private message to Lucca.
Sadly, I've not heard anything from her, but the message 'sent'. Is anyone in contact with her?

Oh, goodness. I do hope she's alright, and that someone has been in touch with her.

I have tried more than once without success as well.
I can only conclude this is her own choice

Foxygloves

I have tried more than once without success as well.
I can only conclude this is her own choice

Perhaps sadly, Lucca is unable to respond. 😒

I think that the stories that haunt me, stories of people I have known in real life and stories I have read on GN, are those about mothers who have lost children.

This seems to me to be one of the worst things which could ever happen, for your child to die before you.

I have known so many people in real life and read the stories of so many gransnetters who have endured this dreadful fate.

My mother, in her ;later years, lived a two and a half our car drive from us. When we visited she always said "please phone as soon ads you get home" I do that now with my children.

So far they have all got home safely, and so I count my blessings

We have come near that twice with DD. Once after a road accident and once through poor medical practice.

Having twice gone down a long way down that road, I want to go no further. My parents suffered the loss of a child when she was in her 40s and my grandmother the death of a toddler.

It is the worst thing and my heart goes out to the Gransnetters who have had this happen. Not me personally but my brother died aged 9 months in the 1950s. My lovely nephew aged 16 in the 1980s.

Marydol sadly, my thoughts too.

I hope Lucca is OK.

I hope she is OK, too. I was thinking about the new posters and how when I first started I started off a lot of threads and most were very welcoming to me. There was a group of 3 or 4 who weren’t. The coven. However, they all left in high dudgeon over some trivial issue a couple of months later and since then it has been great. Some I don’t agree with, of course, but that is what gives the site interest and it is good to hear different points of view. I would say my views are totally different sometimes but, as they say, it’s not worth getting your knickers in a knot over !

Nanna
I agree, I guess it’s best not to take it seriously, if you don’t like it, turn it off, job done.
I left for about a year once, not really because of anything directed at me, but because I found it all a bit unnecessarily rude and unpleasant.
I came back deciding to just look at the book threads, gradually I’m drawn back in, but the atmosphere is much nicer now.

I m another who was pounced on when I dipped my toe in to offer an opinion I can’t remember what it was about and that was after a lovely first greeting had drawn me in
It really knocked me and there was some ripe posting by Jinglebells who I never did know the nice side of
I wasnt very confident when I started out using this forum I had only been on a small local one before and I reverted to my ‘lack of confidence’ days after reading some others harsh comments and being made fun of because of something I said (and not in a pleasant way) … so I disappeared for a year I didn’t lurk I made a definite decision to not to look and to forget GN
I don’t know why I decided to try again I just did and kind of grew my second skin

Speaking of GN’ers who have lost children (which selfishly I pray is never me).

When I first joined GN, one of the first posts I read was from one who had just lost her adult child.

Not naming her, she still posts, but her brave and honest posts about her loss has always stayed with me.

To me, someone like her is the essence of GN.

Sad to see reference to some of you who have been pounced on, simply for expressing your opinion. I guess most of us have experienced that from time to time, as there are a very few out there who seem incapable of mature debate without resorting to condescension, sarcasm, or even in extreme cases, outright personal abuse. Fortunately GN seems pretty quick to pick this up, and deletes the odd post, even brandishing the welcome red card on occasion. I see those occasional unpleasant outbursts as just slightly irritating background noise, and remind myself that ignorance is the mother of intolerance.

BlueBelle (and others)
So glad you came back. It's horrible to think people are having to leave in order to protect themselves.
💐

Thank you NotSpaggetti I appreciate your answer.
I guess I m tough but not very confident and always put myself on the back foot, always thinking I was the wrong one never the other person, so I should have shrugged it all off and carried on posting whatever I wanted to, however I came back much more of a dipper for a good while then started growing a bit more of a protective shell I suppose.
I guess we are all products of childhood not necessarily our parents or home upbringing but all that happens in the formative years around us and a bit of DNA too my dad was a gentle man who never believed in himself however he was an intelligent chap although had no schooling after 14 so not ‘university type clever’ Mum much more confident or seemed outwardly to be I ve often thought maybe it was all a bit of a bluff with her
Interesting to study …folks and all the many guises they come in

I suspect those of us, who are sensitive, are unable to shrug off pounces, where others are thicker skinned and more robust.
My childhood, never being good enough-, plays a part in my pschye.

No matter how hard we try, there will always be posters, who take a dislike to us. I have to admit, that after getting my fingers burned and my self confidence knocked, I am no longer a prolific poster. No forum is worth all that angst.

Doodledog - are you able to say why a group of "same sort" of people were brought together?
This sounds both quite weird and intriguing!

Bluebelle
I also left completely, never intending to return.
But I missed chatting to people on the book threads, so I gave it another go. I’m fully aware that some of you are much better informed and far more intelligent than me, so I tend to avoid threads where I might get torn to bits.
I just dip in and out, I find it interesting and informative, but sometimes, still unnecessarily unkind.

kittylester

I like Jings a lot. I also grew to like Greatnan but she was one of the people who lambasted me about the tablecloth.

And, who could forget our Phoenix.

None of them typical gransnetters but noteworthy all the same.

I too liked Jings although she once tried to put me in my place, I think her bark was worse than her bite.
The sadness of losing Greatnan and our dear Phoenix, two posters I admired stays with me.

Sara1954

Bluebelle
I also left completely, never intending to return.
But I missed chatting to people on the book threads, so I gave it another go. I’m fully aware that some of you are much better informed and far more intelligent than me, so I tend to avoid threads where I might get torn to bits.
I just dip in and out, I find it interesting and informative, but sometimes, still unnecessarily unkind.

When a poster is being unnecessarily unkind, just ponder why they seem to feel the need - it will say more about them than it does about you.

There will always be people who are more informed and intelligent than one's self - doesn't make your contribution any the less valid though.