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What is a lesbian?

(948 Posts)

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FarNorth Sun 13-Aug-23 00:31:17

Did you think it's uncontroversial to say that lesbians are women (adult female humans) who are sexually attracted to other women (adult female humans)?

You'd be wrong.

Men (adult male humans) can be lesbians too.

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-12401009/amp/Lesbian-speed-dating-event-sparks-transphobia-row-organisers-insist-adult-human-females-attend-popular-weekly-event.html?ico=amp_articleRelated_with_images

VioletSky Sun 20-Aug-23 23:09:15

Show me Lathyrus

Because you have a 90% track record for changing the meaning of what I say and a 10% track record for getting away with it

VioletSky Sun 20-Aug-23 23:14:05

Ok show me but I am going to bed now because am knackered

Mollygo Sun 20-Aug-23 23:23:04

I’m a little bit light-hearted and carefree as well having read the latest from VS.
Neither what she said, or how I feel has anything to do with the thread, so I can share Glorianny’s amusement as well.

It doesn’t change the fact that a lesbian prefers relationships with females.

Or that males cannot be lesbians.

It doesn’t change the fact that some males feel they are entitled to go to female events they’ve been asked not to attend and some females support males doing that.

Lathyrus Sun 20-Aug-23 23:29:24

VioletSky

I love how people feel they can speak for demographics they don't belong to or that they are somehow a representative of the entirety of a demographic they do belong to

Such self importance
So many double standards
So much misinformation
Scapegoating the trans demographic
Very little understanding or empathy

Always the same people saying the same things, nothing new, nothing learned, nothing gained

I posted my opinion that person who is attracted to males and wants sex with a penis is not a lesbian,

Your post followed that and was clearly referring to it and to my “speaking for demographics that they don’t belong to”.

You have no right to say which demographic I belong to and then made several personal remarks.

You misgendered me based on your own intersectional beliefs which are no more valid than mine.

I leave it to your own posts for others to judge whether your views of yourself are valid.

VioletSky Sun 20-Aug-23 23:40:14

Lol

1 I am still here

2 I never address you unless I am answering you

3. I wasn't actually answering you, indirectly either, it was a response to what I had read over the entire thread

You are now down to 9%

VioletSky Sun 20-Aug-23 23:41:13

Ok night, thanks for helping me clear that up

Doodledog Sun 20-Aug-23 23:50:43

So who are you saying is speaking for demographics they don’t belong to then? And on what evidence?

Dickens Mon 21-Aug-23 00:20:02

Iam64

Fleurpepper, i imagine it isn’t impossible you’re easily identifiable because of your sm presence
Are you sure your niece and friends are comfortable with the extent of personal information about them you’ve shared here

I was thinking along those lines, too.

I know Fp is being complimentary about these individuals, and the people in the village are 'aware' of the transitions - but it's still very intimate information that's being shared about them - which anyone, just about anywhere, can read. I think you have to be careful when giving out information like this, and respect the privacy of the people involved.

Mollygo Mon 21-Aug-23 02:33:41

Doodledog

So who are you saying is speaking for demographics they don’t belong to then? And on what evidence?

VS is saying that about anyone who disagrees with her, and claiming to know about people’s demographic even though they have given less personal information than she has provided about herself. Others have never claimed to be or not to be certain demographic in order to validate their right to speak.
She is doing that on the evidence of her own opinion.

Smileless2012 Mon 21-Aug-23 08:59:31

Regardless of which demographic someone belongs to, they are still giving their opinion which may or may not be shared by the majority of those in the same demographic.

I don't know what being a little bit gay is supposed to mean but that doesn't make the opinions of someone who is, any more valid than someone who isn't.

Lathyrus Mon 21-Aug-23 09:04:16

VioletSky

Lol

1 I am still here

2 I never address you unless I am answering you

3. I wasn't actually answering you, indirectly either, it was a response to what I had read over the entire thread

You are now down to 9%

Everybody on this thread knows you were addressing me.
Regardless of what you say about yourself and your posts the teality is there for everyone to see

Except perhaps yourself.

Lathyrus Mon 21-Aug-23 09:09:15

Lathyrus

VioletSky

I love how people feel they can speak for demographics they don't belong to or that they are somehow a representative of the entirety of a demographic they do belong to

Such self importance
So many double standards
So much misinformation
Scapegoating the trans demographic
Very little understanding or empathy

Always the same people saying the same things, nothing new, nothing learned, nothing gained

I posted my opinion that person who is attracted to males and wants sex with a penis is not a lesbian,

Your post followed that and was clearly referring to it and to my “speaking for demographics that they don’t belong to”.

You have no right to say which demographic I belong to and then made several personal remarks.

You misgendered me based on your own intersectional beliefs which are no more valid than mine.

I leave it to your own posts for others to judge whether your views of yourself are valid.

Not just this post.

I am leaving Gransnet now because of Violetsky and her constant hounding of me. I stopped posting before because of it and then returned but I cannot escape her.

Her misgendering of me was the final straw.

Lathyrus Mon 21-Aug-23 09:09:44

I thought you might like to see what I have reported

Smileless2012 Mon 21-Aug-23 09:12:10

Don't deprive us of your intelligent contributions to this and so many topics because of one poster Lathyrus.

Mollygo Mon 21-Aug-23 09:54:53

Smileless2012

Don't deprive us of your intelligent contributions to this and so many topics because of one poster Lathyrus.

Ditto.
Don’t let the VS’ bullying force you off GN.

eazybee Mon 21-Aug-23 10:46:35

Lathyrus, don't dignify Violet's ramblings with the term 'bullying.'
Do what most people do, laugh, ignore and move on.
Far more intelligent people to talk with.

Doodledog Mon 21-Aug-23 11:29:47

Don’t go, Lathyrus. Too many good people have gone because of this sort of thing. I know people can only take so much, but the truth is that however many denials there are, readers can see what’s happening. I hope you reconsider and decide to stay.

FarNorth Mon 21-Aug-23 12:48:52

Lathyrus please don't leave because of upsetting posts from others.

I haven't been reading all the posts on this thread, so I don't know who's said what, and I advise anyone who feels got at to report the person doing it and/or to ignore posts from that person.

Namsnanny Mon 21-Aug-23 12:50:29

I should like to add my request that you stay on GN to all the others Lathyrus
My gran used to say Empty vessels make the most noise

FarNorth Mon 21-Aug-23 13:04:24

The Equality Act 2010 allows for single-sex stipulation to be made if it is a proportionate means of achieving a legitimate aim.

I'd say the aim of having a lesbians', or gay mens', dating night be for one sex only is legitimate and simply stating it to be so is a proportionate means of achieving that legitimate aim.

What was all that campaigning for gay rights about, and what do gay rights even mean, if anyone at all can claim to be the sex they wish to be?

Namsnanny Mon 21-Aug-23 13:18:08

Divide et impera
Is what it really is about.

Smileless2012 Mon 21-Aug-23 13:23:43

I agree FarNorth and wonder in addition to those hard fought for gay rights, what was the point of those brave women who campaigned for women's rights, and those especially the ones in the public eye who continue to do so, when a vocal and such an unpleasant minority appear to the able to flout those rights with impunity?

Smileless2012 Mon 21-Aug-23 13:25:29

Which is why women need to stick together Namsnanny.

Namsnanny Mon 21-Aug-23 13:53:39

I couldnt agree more Smileless
I just wonder if it's easier to keep explaining the facts, over and over, if in the back of our heads we remember the trans persons struggle has become weaponized and twisted into an ideology that wishes to disrupt and confuse normal relationships.
I'm probably not explainng myself very well (what's new🤣).
Hope you get the gist?

Smileless2012 Mon 21-Aug-23 14:09:20

You've explained yourself very well Namsnanny and I completely agree.