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Being called a 'Guy'

(180 Posts)
Mazgg Fri 20-Oct-23 11:38:00

I have noticed recently when out with a male friend waiters (in several establishments) ask "What can I get you guys".
We are both in our 80s and it seems comical to be classed as Guys. When with a female friend it's usually Ladies, which is fine. What's wrong with just asking "what can I get you" with a smile?
Oh dear, now I sound like a grumpy old woman!

Mazgg Fri 20-Oct-23 18:01:39

This was meant as mild observation. It doesn't mean that I can't also think about more serious matters.
Why do some posters have to be so confrontational?

Galaxy Fri 20-Oct-23 18:05:14

Anyone can think about what they like without having to justify it. I am currently thinking about crisps.

Celieanne86 Fri 20-Oct-23 18:21:09

When my son was 50 he had a bbq at his home which is 60 miles from us and sent his dad and me an invitation by email……HI GUYS HAVING A BBQ AT HOME ON DATE, HOPE YOU CAN MAKE IT CANT FIND YOU A BED HERE SO AM SENDING DETAILS OF LOCAL HOTELS HOPE YOU CAN MAKE IT…..
No we didn’t bother going and felt both hurt and rejected and it has never been mentioned since. My daughter went and said we wouldn’t have enjoyed it anyway it was mainly friends and was very noisy and drink, but it would have been nice to have been asked properly.

Sara1954 Fri 20-Oct-23 18:37:20

I don’t mind, I even use the term myself at work when I want to get everyone’s attention, and my grandchildren tend to say ‘you guys’ when talking to the adults.
Could be called a lot of worse things

VioletSky Fri 20-Oct-23 19:46:56

It was a BBQ, not a haute cuisine fine dining experience at a Michelin starred restaurant

Come on guys

RosiesMaw Fri 20-Oct-23 19:59:01

Talk about cutting off your nose to spite your face!

RosiesMaw Fri 20-Oct-23 19:59:56

Oldnproud

Urmstongran

I don’t mind it at all. Sounds cheery and friendly to me whenever it’s been used and I always feel warmly included by it.
😊

Me too.

Me three!

Louella12 Fri 20-Oct-23 20:01:44

Doesn't bother me at all

welbeck Fri 20-Oct-23 20:16:32

i can't see anything wrong with it at all.
i'm puzzled why some people feel so strongly against it.
it just sounds friendly and informal to me.

MerylStreep Fri 20-Oct-23 20:18:24

Celieanne
Are you seriously saying that you didn’t attend your sons bbq because he called his parents Guys Your loss. He sounds a lovely friendly person.

Louella12 Fri 20-Oct-23 20:34:51

Just thinking about this and I've remembered that our lovely son in law always says 'Hi guys' when he comes round.

V3ra Fri 20-Oct-23 20:39:06

Celieanne86

When my son was 50 he had a bbq at his home which is 60 miles from us and sent his dad and me an invitation by email……HI GUYS HAVING A BBQ AT HOME ON DATE, HOPE YOU CAN MAKE IT CANT FIND YOU A BED HERE SO AM SENDING DETAILS OF LOCAL HOTELS HOPE YOU CAN MAKE IT…..
No we didn’t bother going and felt both hurt and rejected and it has never been mentioned since. My daughter went and said we wouldn’t have enjoyed it anyway it was mainly friends and was very noisy and drink, but it would have been nice to have been asked properly.

From the wording it was a group invitation to a barbecue at home.
I'd have been flattered to have been included in the gang!

NotSpaghetti Fri 20-Oct-23 21:45:31

We have family members who say "guys" I've they mean everyone.

I don't like it but would still go to the birthday celebrations!

I would actually be more dismayed that it was a barbecue though as I really hate the smell of them! ☹️

Grammaretto Fri 20-Oct-23 22:49:04

That BBQ invitation. CelieanneI wouldn't mind receiving that. I possibly wouldn't have wanted the hassle of staying at an hotel but your own son's 50th! A real compliment.

Our walking group passed some fishermen on our walk. "Good morning ladies" said one. I replied "good morning gentlemen" which seemed to cause amusement.
We are gentlemen are we ha ha ha.
I don't really like to be called a guy but I guess there are worse things. I might expect it in a restaurant.
I also dislike "oh bless" Maybee
And "you're welcome" every second sentence.

Sara1954 Sat 21-Oct-23 07:03:45

Sixty miles is only an hours drive, no need to stay over unless you were planning on getting drunk

NanKate Sat 21-Oct-23 07:08:24

It doesn’t bother me at all. 👍

cornergran Sat 21-Oct-23 07:28:01

We’re all different. The things that irritate us will be different. Personally I thoroughly dislike being addressed as ‘guys’ just as I dislike a friend telling me she’s been out with ‘the girls’ when they are all over 80. I’m sure there are terms I habitually use that irritate other people. All part of living.

Grammaretto Sat 21-Oct-23 08:57:17

True cornergran
My DMiL, who died this year aged 98, always referred to her "girls" meaning her old school friends who met up in Edinburgh several times a year. I believe one outlived her as that family came to her funeral.

Iam64 Sat 21-Oct-23 08:59:12

I’d much rather be greeted with guys than ladies

Nannarose Sat 21-Oct-23 09:00:15

I don't mind 'girls' either. I think it's because my formidable grandmother and her sisters called themselves 'the gels' (local accent - hard 'g').
They, like many of the facory workers were hard-working and hard-playing; they took no nonsense from anyone, had no regard for supposed 'social betters', and valued people according to their character & deeds. They made quite a group to cheer on the one who became the first woman mayor locally. Us younger ones were honorary 'gels' and so i never thought of it as 'twee'

downtoearth Sat 21-Oct-23 09:12:09

I don't mind as long as I get a smile with it

Chardy Sat 21-Oct-23 09:13:18

I've found 'guys' perfectly acceptable for literally decades.
I have a delightful local shop owner who calls me 'ma'am' which I loathe, but he feels it's respectful. Personally I dislike 'ladies'. Like ma'am I find it old-fashioned, and reminds me I'm turning into my grandmother (which obviously I am).

MerylStreep Sat 21-Oct-23 09:41:49

I always say I’m going out with the girls, and btw I think it’s lovely.
Now I’m wondering what other term I would use when informing my OH where I’m going.
I going out with my ladies?
Im going out with the ladies?
Im going out with my friends?
Im going out with ( list 6 names)
I think not.

Sara1954 Sat 21-Oct-23 13:02:00

I’m not keen on being called ‘young lady’ when I’m clearly not.
Not really keen on sweetheart or darling either.
But as others have already said, as long as it comes with a smile, I can live with it.

Quokka Sat 21-Oct-23 13:23:50

Not a problem for me. I’m with those who say there are better things to worry about.