Unable to fall asleep and I’m so so tired

Bonnie all I know is worrying or even thinking about it makes the sleep further away than ever Acceptance in my opinion is the clue
You have to take your mind off sleeping and tell yourself if you don’t sleep it’s absolutely fine The more you fight the sleeplessness the less you will sleep
For years now I ve bunny hopped through the night and totally accept it I don’t worry about it and it’s absolutely fine sometimes I do Wordle at 3 am in the morning sometimes I m playing solitaire, and then I cuddle down and have another couple of hours
Stop thinking about it accept whatever you get and you ll be fine

You need to re-train your routine Bonnybanko, we are creatures that like habit. Personally I go up at 9, no tv or mobile phone or kindle. I have the radio on low, a talking programme, I put my electric underblanket on a medium setting. Prop myself up with two pillows and I knit, just plain easy and mindless knitting. In about 45 minutes my head starts nodding and it is time for me to sleep. I don`t re-awaken myself with teeth brushing etc

Getting up, also a routine, similar time every day

I wake during the night, eat a small oatcake and turn my radio on very low and on a timer. Next time is always waking-up time

After my husband died, my sleep was light, easily interrupted then I couldn’t get back to sleep. It’s part of bereavement I believe. I find magnesium helps especially as it prevents night leg cramps. I’d occasionally read for a while, then go back to sleep. It’s possible to listen to relaxation tapes that aid sleep. I think it’s something we do well to accept as part of grief.

Sorry, I should add - being tired beyond reason also goes with grief x

*RosiesMaw up for a pit stop🤣

It’s 2.20am listening to Mozart looking at how to make pasta dishes, chicken tagliatelle comes to mind. Now time to sleep 💤 I’ll be needing a pit stop soon, it’s the flaming stroke that does it. 🥲

Bonnybanko

*RosiesMaw up for a pit stop🤣

Quote Bonnybanko Wed 06-Dec-23 06:36:36
Hello everyone thank you so much for replying to my request for advice on this matter. I did fall asleep eventually and woke up quite late 8.30am

I’m confused too Juliet27. !

I have found the Tesco brand (there are other brands) Sleep Aid tablets very successful in helping me get to sleep and staying asleep. You shouldn't take them all the time but it helps to break the cycle. There are two strengths. I buy the weakest and just half a tablet works for me, if I need it. You take 20 minutes before you want to sleep. It also works if I wake in the night from falling asleep naturally, which is a common occurrence. Others that I have recommended them to also found them helpful.

I don't know what your diet is but I used to have terrible trouble sleeping - even with medication such as Nytol, Kalms and lavender oils on the pillow etc. I also suffer from tinnitus which doesn't help. I've since changed my diet - cut out sugar, red meat and caffeine and eat a lot of fruit and vegetables. I don't know if it's connected but I sleep like a log now for a good 8hrs a night. But a doctor is surely the one to talk to.

My go to solution is Phenegran, available over the counter. Half a 25mg tablet and I know I will sleep without feeling groggy the following day. Have found out from Gransnet, that you can buy them in 10g tablets so I will no longer need to cut them in half!

I have found that controlling my breathing and counting back from 100 in 7’s works for me. It also helps when I wake in the early hours worrying about things I have no control over.

Im sorry you’re in this state Bonnie as i too am a non sleeper having just spent 5 nights awake and feeling absolutely dreadful. Im on permanent sleeping pills which stopped working so last night took 2 and was away with the fairies.
You could look up CBT, it might help you or meditation or lovely, slow Mozart and quiet various adagios. The did the trick for me last night - good luck. You could ask your GP to send you to a sleep clinic. They’re very good and patient and could help you.

Piriton worked for me,I used to take it every night, but now I’m back in a good sleeping pattern I don’t need to take it anymore. Should I start to have sleepless nights again I would take it again.

I go to bed around 9.30 but start switching lights off in the lounge c 9pm, one by one every 5 mins or so. I dont do big ceiling lights, just little wall lights and a standing lamp. Switch on electric blanket, change into my night gear and brush teeth etc. Then just read till i feel sleepy and go to bed immediately. Lights off head down and sleep. Sometimes i read a few pages in bed but all lights off and just my kindle back-light on low.
If i wake in the night, get up after 15mins, light level very low again, make a cup of tea with a dig biscuit, wait till i feel sleepy and back into bed. Sometimes 2 or even 3x a night. It's the only method which (usually) works for me and my brain is now convinced too!! Good luck all of you insomniacs..

I am so sorry to hear you lost your husband.
All I can tell you is what works for me. I listen to an audiobook on audible through my headphones. I can set it to run for so many minutes. Just helps to focus my thoughts on one thing.

I go to bed around 1-1.30am and just play a game on my phone or read until I'm really tired. This is usually around 2.30. If I'm stressed or worried about anything it could be as late as 4am. Wake between 9 and 11am every day. It's not a great sleep pattern but it works for me. Tried so many times to sleep earlier but just end up awake most of the night so given up now. If I have less than 6 hours sleep I fall sleep on the sofa for a few hours. Been like this since working shifts in my 40s and 50s where the most busy time was between midnight and 2am.
OP find your 'normal' time to feel really tired and stick with it regardless of how late it is. Hth xx

I find Pukka Sleep tea helps.Try having a cup about two hours before going to bed.

Another regular insomniac here! yes definitely seem to function on less sleep as age but it is the cursed early morn appointment that really is trouble. I have radio with one earphone and also podcasts. I dont like to have wifi devices incl phone switched on near bed so download a podcast and set timer. Some are more soporific than others! If still awake c 6 am, I get up and have breakfast (toast/tea). That usually works and can get good quality block of hour or two and am good for the day even tho might have had only 5 hours over all.

Some years ago I went to a sleep therapist because my sleep pattern was so bad.
In a nutshell it’s retraining your brain. With insomnia your brain is wired not to go to sleep. It has to be re-wired to sleep.

This article explains it in more detail.

scitechdaily.com/insomnia-how-to-rewire-your-brain-for-sleep/#:~:text=Rather%20than%20put%20pressure%20on,the%20new%20habit%20of%20sleeping.

Totally agree and I use my Fitbit mindfulness sleep stories. Never got to the end yet! 45 mins long..If notgot Fitbit use You tube sleep meditations

I found it very hard to get to sleep too after losing my DH. As soon as I laid there in the quiet my mind would start whirring thinking about everything . I started reading my Kindle every night just to take my mind off all the important stuff and found I would start dropping off that way. This did work for quite a few months and meant 3/4 hours sleep before waking at maybe 4am - not ideal but it helped. 18 mths later I have more good nights than bad and don't need to use the Kindle anymore. I hope you soon find a solution that suits you, you need the sleep to get through this dreadful time.

I listën to a travel book on borrowbox so theres no story to follow and set the timer to go off after 30mins or the rest is politics podcast and do the same. Magnesium helps my husband to get into a deeper sleep .

Audio books are very helpful, I usually find I’ve missed quite a bit 😴

I've found that having an electric blanket on all night (set low) really helps my sleep..also a walk during the day..

Bonnybanko
You have a very interesting use of terminology 🤔

Anyway I hope you have been helped by all the kind suggestions offered.