Lack of public toilets in towns.

@NotSpaghetti

I even asked to go privately to have surgery but because I have a history of hernias in the lower region of my body, 2 Femeral hernia operations, upper abdominal hernia, umbilical hernia and now a vaginal prolapse, they said at my age 81, if needing the toilet more often BUT not being classed as having incontinence it is not worth the risk of having an operation at my age. I am NOT incontinent at all, I just need the toilet every hour with no leaking inbetween. If I go on a bus journey, I need the toilet before I get on the bus and immediately aftert I get off the bus and so I need to know exactly where the toilets are but as I said, when I went to a little town the other day, I went straight to the toilet in the community centre and it was closed due to repairs I had to get a taxi straight home again.

@NotSpaghetti............

YES, IT DEFINITELY IS MY PROBLEM, I did see the posting on the web and totally agree with it because lack of toilets in towns and cities has turned me into a bit of a recluse because I am afraid of going anywhere new apart from the shopping centres where I know there are toilets.

Apology,

I worked for the NHS for 15 years not 1.

Grannynannywanny Tue 23-Apr-24 14:57:43
RunaroundSue it might be worthwhile asking to make an appointment with the continence nurse specialist. Every GP practice normally has access to this service. They are experts in all things bladder related.

They will do an assessment and hopefully provide useful advice. They will liaise with your GP if it’s thought you might benefit from medication used to calm an irritable/unstable bladder . If this is the root of the problem the medication could make a huge difference and restore your freedom to get out and enjoy life. At the very least the nurse should prescribe the correct pads which will give you the proper protection you need to go out and meet your friends without feeling

I worked for the NHS for 1 years and I was in charge of the Incontinence products, measuring what they needed, what type they needed so I am very up to date with these things but I have tried the types I gave advice to other patients about and I honestly think the pads of today have not improved at all, I think they have got worse, not as absorbent as they once were.

I don't think town planners appreciate how vital good toilets are. Many people are reluctant to shop in other towns because of the lack of toilets.
Vandalism was one reason for many toilets being closed. Instead of dealing with the vandals, they closed the toilets. Not the right way to address the problem.

No problem NotSpaghetti 😊

Oh. Apologies Grannynannywanny I originally thought it was RSue's problem and suggested the RADAR key - but then re-read the 1st post which said:
I saw this on the web and I totally agree with it.

So what was written then seemed to be a quote from the web

Now I see I have somehow missed a whole chunk of this thread - there are several posts I hadn't seen. I have no idea why.
Sorry everyone if I have contributed to confusion.

RunaroundSue I wonder why surgery hasn't been suggested if all else has failed...
You clearly cannot be expected to go on like this!

NotSpaghetti unless I’m misreading the thread, in her post yesterday evening the OP has clarified that she does have this problem. She is so incapacitated by it that she finds it difficult to go out. She has also posted that her situation is so difficult that life with a catheter would be preferable.

Yesterday 18:37 RunaroundSue

ALSO Someone has posted called CHESTNUT stating that it is not my own experience, but it IS my own experience and I am at the end of my tether as I am a fit woman for my age, can walk miles but needs a toilet when I am out and about.

Grannynannywanny - the OP doesn't have this problem. They are just raising it as an issue for others.

I'm with vegansrock, I walk into pubs or hotels and use their loos. Also agree with her about John Lewis loos, the ones near me were tired before covid and I had hoped that they would use that time to refit, no such luck!

I looked on the site "find your nearest toilet" but it isn't working for me. I was told my nearest public loo is about 5 miles away in the Pentland Hills regional park visitor centre.
Good for them!

There are new accessible unisex loos at the coastal resorts in East Lothian which is good.

RunaroundSue it might be worthwhile asking to make an appointment with the continence nurse specialist. Every GP practice normally has access to this service. They are experts in all things bladder related.

They will do an assessment and hopefully provide useful advice. They will liaise with your GP if it’s thought you might benefit from medication used to calm an irritable/unstable bladder . If this is the root of the problem the medication could make a huge difference and restore your freedom to get out and enjoy life. At the very least the nurse should prescribe the correct pads which will give you the proper protection you need to go out and meet your friends without feeling anxious.

Pure discrimination against the sick,older people and little defenceless children in my book.

Here in Manchester the council closed the public lavatories due to the austerity agenda introduced by David Cameron and Nick Clegg, but at the same time they encouraged the food and drink outlets to allow the public to use their facilities. I do this when out and about and have never been challenged or had to buy anything.

We have a few new toilet blocks here but they all have a gender neutral cubicle and I wouldn’t want to use this if the queue for the ladies toilets was very long as it often is in summer.

Many men have poor aims and if you walk past a mens loo with the door open the smell is awful.

Just re-read and realised it's not the OP with a particularly dire problem.
Apologies.

But if anyone does have this issue I suggest a RADAR key.

My lodger cleans the local public toilets but they are vandalised several times a week so he has to close them. It’s disgusting what some people do in them. It cost our town council over £10,000 last year to repair vandalism, including the toilets. I suspect this is why councils don’t provide public toilets anymore. It’s mainly druggies and drunks doing the damage regularly so it’s not always safe to use them anyway.
As someone who has incontinence issues it really does affect me, it makes me so mad. Especially as the police do so little about it (it’s regular, mainly evenings, same places and usually the same people)!

I’m not sure which Gran here pointed out here that there’s a toilet finding app! I honestly can’t thank you enough, I had no idea!

Sara1954 I am with you there - I’d rather go behind a bush than use unisex loos. I am very fussy about public toilets and, like some other posters, am reluctant to visit some places due to the lack of toilets. In my nearest city there are public toilets where you pay 20p but they are spotless and Ladies and Men are separate. Why don’t they do that everywhere as no one would begrudge 20p.

Do you have a RADAR key?

shop.disabilityrightsuk.org/products/radar-key

Just to add, a few years ago we went to Wales, and on the whole, they had great toilets.

My husband and I went to a local seaside town for a walk, not a big resort, but always busy. The public toilets were cordoned off, and there was a sign telling you where portable loos were, but they were all padlock, so we went in a pub and bought a drink. Which we obviously just sipped and left.
It really is a problem, and must surely put people off visiting.
There is a big Morrisons just outside the harbour, and we tend to pop in there on the way.
As for our local town, a block of unisex loos, I would rather wee behind a bush than go in there

When we went to the channel Islands a few years ago, there were toilets non-stop along the sea front. It was amazing. I am also prone to urine infections and seem to live on antibiotics due to a medical condition I have, I take Cranberry supplements, drink cranberry juice and plenty of water which does not help as I then need the toilet more and more, it is a vicious circle. I even wished I was wearing a catheter as it has affected my life so much.

I would like to thank every single person who has replied to my posting for their very helpful advice. Yes, you are so right, it just isn't the elderly with these problems it is people with medical problems. If all stores of a certain size had a toilet, I would willingly pay whatever they asked to use their toilets.

Thank you all. Everyone has been extremely helpful.

I’m 64, and a couple of years ago was having a real issue with “urgency” - if I needed the loo I needed it straight away! GP was great, I tried the Vagirux but it wasn’t enough so now have Mirabegron, which has worked brilliantly. Might be worth asking your GP again, as going around dehydrated has all sorts of other health implications.

I also have a Can’t Wait card which I bought from the IBS network, along with a radar key. Ironically the IBS is much less of a problem these days, but still frequently need the loo when I’m out working in the community and between client visits. I’ll definitely download that app!

RunaroundSue you can buy on access card . It's a easy form to fill in on line . It costs £15 for 3 years. There are various symbols you can have on it for your needs . One of them is a toilet symbol which means if you need the loo but there is no public one then you can show it in a shop and they will let you use the staff one. Its for anyone with health and or disability problems and of all ages.

I can't do links but Google access online card . Mine came within a few days of filling in the form.