When to move?

I've decided to stay put. A bungalow would be better but I actually love the house. We have a downstairs loo and a stair lift so we manage. If we moved it would all come down to me and I couldn't face it. I do the garden, cleaning and get tradespeople in to do jobs.

The housing market seems very sluggish at the moment.

Fine if you are buying but don't have a property to sell first.

How do you know when it's the right time?
My house is very big and has maintenance problems on an ever increasing scale. I am emptying buckets daily from a leaky roof. Trees in the garden need attention. The windows need painting

However, I love where it is. It has an ideal position in the town centre but just off the main road. All amenities are on my doorstep. My friends are close by and most activities are walking distance.
If I have to stop driving, I will hardly notice. I already share my car with others who need it in emergencies.
I am a widow and live alone but I let out part of the house (a granny flat) and my studio, which I share with several others (I am an artist) is here as well.
I host volunteers who help with garden and cleaning.

I have an idea to sell the big house and to have a small kit house built in part of the huge garden.
My DC are against this idea. They think it will be far too stressful and say I should sell and move and stop being so fussy. I don't like houses I have seen
I am torn.
At my age 75, I probably should be preparing to downsize.
My DC are not particularly nearby.
I shall continue to read this with interest.

1summer

Thank you, I will keep you updated on what I do. I am sure to come back for advice from you all moving forward. I know you will be very supportive.
I do have a son and daughter, my daughter just had a baby 6 weeks ago and is very practical and organised but my son is the opposite but is willing and will help with heavy lifting etc.

Presumably you will want to declutter first and some removal firms will come and pack everything for you.
It's stressful but, if you find exactly the right property for you, will be worth it.

It's finding somewhere that is the problem here so I think we've missed the boat.
The cost of moving could go some way towards paying for help with the garden and perhaps a cleaner at some point.

Sometimes one downsize isn’t enough. We moved from an inner suburb to a village in preparation for retirement; when DH was diagnosed with Parkinson’s we moved to the next village which had more in the way of amenities to a slightly smaller house. Now I am on my own the house is really too big but is in good order and I have excellent cleaning and gardening help. If something smaller comes up in the village that might be sensible but I am not sure I can face both the downsizing and the getting somewhere else up to scratch so am sitting tight until the care home is inevitable.

I find you never get anyone to look after your garden as well as you used to and would still like to . I go behind the chap we get the next day and remove the weeds , always at the back and difficult to get at , that he has missed . I am better value than he is at £20 an hour .

sorry that was a reply to HelterSkelter

Congratulations on your baby granddaughter. With an organized daughter to help you and a strong son you're good to go. Chin up and good luck. It could all be exciting.

one thing you may consider when you look at moving is that some groups of flats that have been custom build have a guest room , so that you would not have to have the extra room, which might mean it was less expensive for you to buy a one bedroom flat. Alternatively if you think that you would not have visitors often ,if you have a b and b or small hotel nearby , then you can have the company but not the effort of getting ready and also if you are used to living on your own it is quite different having people with you for a week or something. I only mention this because again , taking patients they would sometimes say how their spare rooms were rarely used and was it worth it etc. I hope that things improve for you and that you will not have to deal with this for a long time . Best wishes

Thank you, I will keep you updated on what I do. I am sure to come back for advice from you all moving forward. I know you will be very supportive.
I do have a son and daughter, my daughter just had a baby 6 weeks ago and is very practical and organised but my son is the opposite but is willing and will help with heavy lifting etc.

You can start a thread too, and we can "help"you on here?

1summer

My husband and I were going to move (downsize) and we both mentally decided it was time so in February 2020 put our house on the market, in March 2020 due to lockdown took it off the market.
The following year we put it back on the market a few weeks later my husband was diagnosed with Leukaemia so we took it off the market again.
He died in 2022 and I hate living in my house, it’s too big, I hate the garden and a it’s a real struggle to get a gardener in my area. Things are going wrong in house and soon I may have to spend considerable amount of money doing jobs. I really want to move but dread doing it on my own, all the stress, sorting out packing up etc.
I need a push to do it.

I wouldnt do it on your own.
If you dont have family who can help, how about friends? Some people love helping with this type of thing.

Isummer, ring the estate agent first thing Tuesday morning

The answer is do it sooner rather than later.

HelterSkelter1

1Summer I am sorry to read your post. It must seem a mountain to climb. Not how you wanted this stage of your life to be. Can you spend some time thinking of where you could move to. Do you have family to be closer to? Could you start looking at houses and get an idea of what would be the sort of house/flat you would like. So take some small steps which could make you feel more positive and confident. Do you have adult children who could help with the admin of moving and packing? I know this is what I have ahead of me....so I am encouraging myself as well as you. I am sure there are Grans on here who have felt very much the same.

Thank you for this, I have started to do this. I know the type of house I want and area I would like it, I get Rightmove alerts for house that come on the market. I also have a list of top priorities of what the house must have. So I am almost ready.
But it’s that final push to do it, every month I seem to have an excuse to postpone another month.

1Summer I am sorry to read your post. It must seem a mountain to climb. Not how you wanted this stage of your life to be. Can you spend some time thinking of where you could move to. Do you have family to be closer to? Could you start looking at houses and get an idea of what would be the sort of house/flat you would like. So take some small steps which could make you feel more positive and confident. Do you have adult children who could help with the admin of moving and packing? I know this is what I have ahead of me....so I am encouraging myself as well as you. I am sure there are Grans on here who have felt very much the same.

My husband and I were going to move (downsize) and we both mentally decided it was time so in February 2020 put our house on the market, in March 2020 due to lockdown took it off the market.
The following year we put it back on the market a few weeks later my husband was diagnosed with Leukaemia so we took it off the market again.
He died in 2022 and I hate living in my house, it’s too big, I hate the garden and a it’s a real struggle to get a gardener in my area. Things are going wrong in house and soon I may have to spend considerable amount of money doing jobs. I really want to move but dread doing it on my own, all the stress, sorting out packing up etc.
I need a push to do it.

Every couple of years I re/visit this subject. I’m still in a large house with an even bigger garden! I could not leave my garden as I made it from scratch 29 years ago when I moved in. A new build with nothing but a Lime Tree with a conservation order in the back garden. I’ve been age proofing it for a few years now. Especially since I had a bad fall 3 years ago on the old steps. I’ve decided I’ll just get a gardener when I can’t manage it myself. He/she will need to be good though!

I have already employed a gardener, I can still do my own housework and washing and if I needed help with the stairs I will buy a stairlift. I splashed out on a walk in shower after my husband died so if ever I need some help cleaning, I will pay for a cleaner. I live in a detached house with an extension and large gardens but I love the area it is quiet and peaceful and next door to the park so unless something drastic happens I am staying put.

We decided to leave London early when we reached 60 rather than wait until retirement. The plan was to carry on working, flying up to City each week, but the airline went bust, and then along came covid. We tried to juggle things by other means, but it all became hassle and we retired early.
We already knew the area we moved back to, and this time round we didn't make the mistake of having a big garden because the beach and countryside are both on our doorstep. We are lucky two of our children and their families live nearby.
What I'm sort of saying is, that it's never the right time, or the wrong time to move. If you feel you might be better off elsewhere, then you just have to take the plunge and go.

Norah

zakouma66

Sad to hear about people suffering from poor health and loss.

But, really,reading some of these posts they bear no resemblance to the lives of many people. Huge big houses to sell, apartments unused and so on.

I will probably be accused of something like virue signalling but so many people have so little ( through no fault of their own)

Whilst I can appreciate your sentiment, many people do wish to move and that was the question.

Many people move or wish because they have health problems or no longer need space for a partner - but it's not up to us the decide for them, is it?

Of course not Norah and I am mindful of the original question.

We did it three years ago, at the height of lock down, not a good time to move in retrospect, but thinking back, when we got the offer on our house and had our offer accepted on the house we wanted to buy, conditions were more relaxed before the country went back into full lock down again. We'd known for quite some time that we wanted to get further away from London, preferably outside the M25 and scouted quite a few towns for several years, where we are now often came out top of potentials, it was a question of finding the right house. Often children keep families rooted to an area, but they'd both left home by then. Whilst our children like coming to see us here and staying, they do moan occasionally, about us leaving the place where they'd grown up In fact when we told them we were actually on the move, we'd been saying it for ages, one of their girlfriends said, because she loved coming down to stay where we used to live, "I'll believe it when I see it!" One of my boys, very tongue in cheek, I might add, said something like " no! don't do it, think of the children" Good grief at 31 and 34, as they were then, I don't think so

Unintentionally we did a sideways move, we've actually got more room here, and a good sized garden, screened by trees Our last house was on 3 floors and that was another reason for us wanting to move, just too many stairs. We'd hard wired into ourselves, "never go up without taking something and never come down without bringing something" We love it here, a couple of miles from a market town with numerous amenities, a railway station, it's about an hour into London Bridge, one son, when he's in the office works right there a couple of minutes from that main line station, so he will often jump on the train and come down here for a night. We have lovely country side around us, we're also an easy drive from the coast a mere 15 miles away.

zakouma66

Sad to hear about people suffering from poor health and loss.

But, really,reading some of these posts they bear no resemblance to the lives of many people. Huge big houses to sell, apartments unused and so on.

I will probably be accused of something like virue signalling but so many people have so little ( through no fault of their own)

Whilst I can appreciate your sentiment, many people do wish to move and that was the question.

Many people move or wish because they have health problems or no longer need space for a partner - but it's not up to us the decide for them, is it?

Sad to hear about people suffering from poor health and loss.

But, really,reading some of these posts they bear no resemblance to the lives of many people. Huge big houses to sell, apartments unused and so on.

I will probably be accused of something like virue signalling but so many people have so little ( through no fault of their own)

We have just put ours on the market.
We are 61 and 67, the house is Edwardian,4 bedrooms and two bathrooms, two living rooms, dining room, dining kitchen and study on 3 floors.
The garden is our joy we love it and enjoy maintaining it.
However, we are hardly ever here, we have an apartment in North Yorkshire that we use when it’s not let and I don’t want the house to become a burden.
Our daughter has a big house that can accommodate all the family, one son in London in a flat and the other in Oslo so our daughter and husband can have a turn at hosting everyone!
It may be that we don’t get a buyer and we stay but I’m hoping we can sell and downsize.