Things You Can't Do No Matter How Much You Try!

mae13

Dismantling the roller brushes on my Vax carpet shampoo machine. Talk about "The Machine From Hell!" ( designed by a man, if you ask me, who has no intention of using one!)

I can't replace the drive belts on our Bissell carpet washing machine either. I have no idea why they can't design machines so that you can do everyday servicing easily.

I cannot ride a bike. Re pizza: I take scissors with me to the restaurant - if it's not pre-sliced, I do not care who sees me have at it...

No matter how hard I try, I can’t get my DH to… put his shoes in the shoe rack, get up and put empty crisp packets, sweet wrappers etc in the ( nearby) bin or empty the dirty water after washing up 🤣🙄

Pantglas2

I use ordinary strong kitchen scissors to cut pizza as I have limited room in my drawers (😉) for gadgets!

I can’t read a map unless I turn it the way I’m going which drives Mr PG mad 😡 - I can read upside down though which means I always make the right calls as navigator (and that makes him madder still 🤬!

I also am hopeless with maps, only slightly better if they are the right way round. If you were to plonk me in a strange town with a map I would virtually always end up at the opposite end to my destination.
Most satnavs turn the map so that they are facing the way you are going so this is obviously the right way to do it!

Another person here with zero navigational skills. If there is a choice of turnings I will always take the wrong one. I can find my way to a new destination but then can't find my way back. Drives my husband mad. If I am lost I have no idea which general direction I should be going. Map reading is an anathema to me, thanks to GPS the number of arguments we had while travelling is greatly reduced.

I can't crochet I've tried I just can't get the hang of it. I can knit

I can't parallel park. I'm OK with reverse parking into a space but useless at parallel parking.

To all you who have difficulty with straight lines, whether when drawing or cutting. I do too, but as I have known since a child that what other people see as a straight horizontal line I see as one that slants slightly upwards towards the right, I can compensate for this peculiarity of my eyesight.

As far as I know it is caused by my astixsmatismn I have one in each eye. My mother had the same difficulty with straight horizontal lines.

To a less extent I see vertical lines skew-wiff too.

I can't draw either, but have long since accepted that you can't be good at everything, but I can paint, both with brush and roller, using either hand.

Cartwheel
Roller skate

Cannot drive, swim or play an instrument. My daughter, on the other, can play the piano by ear.

Can never understand the rules of football, tennis, cricket or odds in Grand National.

What I can do is toggling between English and my native language in one sentence and read Arabic without hitting my head on the brick wall.

When my daughter was a teenager, she told me the reason she cannot do Maths is because she is a very creative person and using the right side of her brain, apparently.

Lizzies

Bridie22 and MissInterpreted my husband really wanted to learn to swim so he could take our daughter. He also found that he sank. He even bought a snorkel and goggles, but they didn’t help.

It's comforting to know you're not the only one!

Boil an egg. I love "dippy eggs" and soldiers, but no matter how I tried, I could not get them right. Either still practically raw, or yolks rock hard. Until I got my Ninja!!! Now, 7 minutes on Airfry at 170 degrees, and perfect dippy eggs.

Sing. I cannot carry a note. But let it be known that just because I can't sing, doesn't mean I won't sing

I can’t wash a car! I’ve had soft tops (another now) so very little bodywork to wash, but I miss so many places, it looks as if Stevie Wonder has had a go.
Another one hopeless with navigation too. The DDs laugh as I get lost in pubs/hotels looking for the loo! On holiday, it’s a joke that I can’t find my way back to my room - given that I’ve got out of the correct lift on the correct floor!!

Macadia. Don’t worry! I stayed a boyfriend’s family house and asked his mum “shall i strip the bed?”. “No, I will iron sheet on the bed” it was only one night, but i now iron my fitted sheets on the bed - takes a couple of minutes and looks great

Say the word “autobiographical” .

Definitely cannot reverse into a parking space. Have to drive around car parks until I find a spot I can drive forwards into and even then I sometimes struggle and prefer to look for 2 empty spaces next to each other and then seem able to park without any problem and without trespassing into the space alongside - duh.

can't reverse park either, I did it once ..it was fine..I had no other option but I would rather walk a few more yards than try it. DD was taking us for a meal one time...only one parking space left...she reversed parked brilliantly....she had something on the dash and she could see where she was parking...and another thing is knitting, the only thing that I could knit was baby clothes...

Do the splits! Even as a child and i sooooo wanted to be able to do them. I have never been a bendy/flexible person.

I also can't whistle through my fingers, no matter how much i try (and i still do occasionally much to the amusement of my grandchildren)

Whistle with my mouth. If i whistle inwards I can manage to make some kind of peeping noise but mostly it feels as if I am pumping myself up like a balloon and I have to stop… but… I can whistle really loud with my fingers ha! I love concerts where I can really let rip. 😗😙😗

Make anything which involves batter - for instance pancakes and yorkshire puds. Also icing cakes - however hard I try I just make a complete mess. Luckily DH is willing to do the icing if needed and does a good job. A few people have said they can't sing. In view of my name here can I please suggest that those who think they can't but would like to, try to find a local community choir. Many of these choirs are full of people who find they can sing when supported by other people. In my (long) experience there are few people who really are properly tone deaf or don't have a voice.

Spuddy -a tip for the pizza. Let it defrost and cut it before you cook it lol A daft thing but I've never been able to fasten my bra in the back. I always fasten it in the front and turn it round lol

Lots of you have commented about reverse parking. My husband is a driving instructor and suggests adjusting the wing mirrors to see parking lines. It may help some of you.

Can't reverse park.
Can't sing or hum in tune.
Can't ride a bike.
Can't wrap presents.
Can't whistle.
Can't read music or play a musical instrument.

I can’t drawn anything more challenging than a matchstick man, reverse park, add up or say my times tables, whistle with two fingers which I’d have loved to be able to do, anything crafty although I do wrap a good present, style my hair very well, remember people I don’t know very well, I have a real problem with face recognition, or understand points of the compass, therefore have the sense of direction of a teabag and frequently get lost coming out of a hotel room. Apart from the above I’m pretty much perfect!

I have no sense of direction. When I come out of a shop I don't know whether to go right or left. I cant swim. Mum's idea was to send me to the swimming baths once a week and somehow I'd learn. I spent the time clinging to the side absolutely terrified.

I keep trying but never seem to get it right.