The meaning of "just after 9"

Baggs

I only hung about because it was an old colleague. She has been unreliable before. Never again!

I love this quote (sorry, can't remember where I found it):

"Early is on time; on time is late; late is unacceptable."

Of course it means a bit early, only just on time, etc.

I think I know her 😁

I always try to arrange a rendezvous in a bookshop or cafe or at least under cover with a seat.
Not a bus stop - ever

If you are early you are wasting your time, if you are late you are wasting mine.
I think just after nine should mean five or six minutes past the hour.

I hate lateness, so I'd probably give them until 9.15, and that would be it. You understand that delays can sometimes be inevitable, but if someone was running really late, I'd expect them to show me the courtesy of letting me know.

My DD would imagine it meant anything before 10 - he is late for everything, and nowadays exceptionally slow, so that could soon become anything before 11. He wouldn't care a jot about keeping me waiting. If I called him to hurry up he will say "just coming" which could mean he'll be there in 30 minutes.

I think it's a sign of ADHD but he pooh poohs that.

It depends why the person is being vague, I think.

If they have an 8.00 appointment that is expected to last 30 minutes, and the journey to the meeting place is 30 minutes she might be hoping to be there for 9.00, but is allowing for the fact that the appointment might run late, so I would wait until she arrived. I would expect an update as soon as there was a reasonable ETA though.

If they are just asking for a bit of leeway because they can't be bothered to get ready on time, then I would allow 10 minutes or so before getting irritated. If I were waiting at home and we weren't going on somewhere time-specific I'd be less bothered than if we had, say, theatre tickets or a third party was expecting us and I was going to be late, too. If I were waiting outside I would probably head home (or on to where we were going) after ten minutes and text to say she should meet me there.

All the same, if traffic is involved it is not always possible to be precise, so again, much depends on the situation.

What about if you're invited to someone's house? I reckon to arrive 5 minutes after the time stated, just to give the host(ess) time to take a breath. And I like my guests to do the same. More than 15 minutes late is rude in my book

My best friend died in 2008, she was well known for being late. One morning she phoned to say she would call in for coffee that morning and arrived 2 days later, it was no point getting annoyed with her.
We had tickets to see the Beautiful South back in their early days, so I told her the gig started at 7pm (I think they were actually due on stage at 9pm), she actually turned up on time that evening and we were far too early lol
On the day of her funeral the service started right on time, I was hoping it would be late as I was always telling her "you will be late for your own funeral "

I think people who are habitually late have no consideration for other people’s time. I can’t count the times I have waited around for latecomers to show up, but no more. I haven’t got enough time left to waste it.

I'd allow up to 9.15 without a message. After that I'd expect to be contacted with an explanation.

When in his teens, DH had a friend who was consistently late. This friend was always told that the meeting time was 30 minutes earlier than was actually intended...

I would be off if they hadn’t come in 15 minutes, the arrogance of it.

I would say 9:15 and then leave. Mind you when I was much younger I waited nearly two hours for someone. Someone I was deeply in love with at the time.
Lots of reasons to wait, lots to go.

My mum and dad nearly never got to have their first date because of my dad's lackadaisical approach to time.

It drove my mum crazy, as she liked to arrive everywhere far too early.

We are opposite too.
My dh is very early everywhere he or we go. He had a hospital appointment at 9 am today and was up snd ready to go at 7 am. The hospital is a 10 minute drive away.
I am rarely late and like to arrive on time but to save argument we always arrive too early.
Last time we flew we were at Stansted 5 hours before our short haul flight. 😡

My mum was like that.
We'd arrange a time, then she'd turn up 2 hours earlier and sit jingling her car keys until I was ready.

We fell out over it regularly.

My DH is always late, which we blame on his being Welsh, not on his ADHD! His college friends have learned to say 'meet at 19:30', when they really mean 20:00.

My father was always way early for everything and we worked out he'd probably spent most of his life waiting around until the allotted time, instead of doing something useful with all that time he'd have saved!

My mum failed to see that arriving too early was just as rude as arriving late.
That blooming woman!!!

I agree, turning up early is annoying too.
Just after 9 means no later than 9.15, I think. Any later is just rude.

Nowt wrong with arriving early for an appointment, surely? I usually do and when waiting rooms weren't universally contaminated with noise pollution (radio, etc), I would happily read a book and not bother anyone.

Dinner parties are a different matter.

But the "different matter" could easily be dealt with by (a) explaining exactly what you mean and (b) chilling and not minding if people bumble in early and muck in with preparations.

Waiting rooms are different if there are enough seats to go around. Sometimes transport is such that people can’t arrive bang on time anyway.

I think the thread is more about people waiting in coffee shops or restaurants, though.

I think the thread is more about people waiting in coffee shops or restaurants, though.

Some of the thread. Mine was a work appointment.

I like to arrive early but not hours early, especially if relying on public transport. Cannot understand why latecomers blame a bus/train for a late arrival, I always get a bus/train that will get me to my destination with plenty of time to spare, and if it doesn’t arrive/breaks down I have time to wait for the next one or order a taxi. Getting somewhere by the skin of my teeth to arrive with just second to spare would kill me. Have two daughters who do this though.

I’m the one who always arrives first. I was the same when working - lived in horror at being late for an appointment.

Whitewavemark2

I’m the one who always arrives first. I was the same when working - lived in horror at being late for an appointment.

Me too. I can understand why someone might qualify a 9.00 appointment by saying ‘just after’ however, if the only transport available would get them there at 6.00 or 8.55. If there is a big waiting room it’s ok to take up a seat and camp out with a flask and knitting, but in (say) a local hairdresser or solicitor, that’s not always an option for more than a few minutes. If meeting a friend then it’s easier to explain any constraints and make arrangements accordingly.