The phrase "get over it"

We are being told to ‘get over it’ on another thread about Trump, by a US poster. Unfortunately there’s nothing we in the UK can do about the choice the US electorate have inflicted on the rest of the world.

I have seen the phrase used on another thread as well today. As well as on other thread[s] in previous days.

It just means move on, forget it. It’s done and dusted. Maybe it has a different meaning here. It is a bit rude but better than get f%%%ed.

Get over it is dismissive and used to end discussion.

I, personally, would never say to someone, either on here or in my everyday life “get over it”, because frankly, I don’t think it’s a very useful expression and also, it’s somewhat blunt and unkind and sounds quite hurtful.
It’s much better, I think, to offer support to someone, listen, and, where possible offer advice to help them cope, deal with and possibly move on from the situation they are facing by encouragement. To tell them “to get over it” sounds unduly harsh.

I can only quote the Serenity prayer, "God, grant me serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference." although I can't pretend that I pray very often, if at all.

However, that prayer says nothing about discussing with others the things that can be changed and how they came to be so much in need of that change, or how any change might be achieved. It doesn't address whether, why or how to feel and express sympathy and support for those who can't easily change the circumstances they are suffering from, nor does it prevent anyone from being anxious about how their circumstances could so easily spread to others.

AGAA4

Get over it is dismissive and used to end discussion.

Yes, it’s a way of shutting you down. I think it’s very rude in any context.

Change what you can, accept what you can't, and be smart enough to know the difference"

A more polite way. But I'm a great believer in it.

Ooh I like that Rula.

I say it to myself sometimes when I know I need to pull myself together, think more objectively and do something positive and constructive to make things better.

I agree “Get over it” is dismissive and being on the end of it can be quite hurtful and rude.

However I do think it can be a wake up call that at best you’re being tedious and at worst damaging yourself and alienating those around you.

I haven’t said it to anyone I think, though I’ve sometimes thought it, particularly when someone is determined to see everyday disappointment as a major tragedy that should not happen to them.

I do say it to myself when I’ve needed to stop my thinking in its tracks by re-living a bad time or, ashamedly, just sometimes when I can’t have what I want.

I do believe we have a choice. Either to let a bad happening define us for the rest of our lives or to consciously work at “getting over it” and living positively.

Rula

*Change what you can, accept what you can't, and be smart enough to know the difference"*

A more polite way. But I'm a great believer in it.

Are you saying that is more polite than "God, grant me serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference." ? It is put in a more modern way, and leaves God out of it, but I don't see that it is more polite. About the same politeness level, I'd say.

If someone said it to me I would consider them dismissive and unwilling to discuss whatever it is I'm telling them.

I don't know if anyone has ever said it to me! I'm struggling to think who would...

Just out of interest what phrase would people use to end the everlasting monologue that some people have about their injustice/opinion/ life event.

When you don’t want to or can’t stop meeting with them but you just can’t go on hearing the same thing over and over again and offering sympathy.

In 50years I never had a conversation with my MiL that didn’t involve her “big operation” and I think I’ll have to stop seeing a friend who 24 years later is still bitter about her divorce and brings it in no matter what the topic.

I’m afraid get over it is exactly what I want to say - though I haven’t.

Lathyrus3 can't you be honest with them?

"I do love you and know how awful xyz was but please can we talk about abc today because I'm concerned about nop?

"I know you will never get over xyz because it was just too awful but I'm exhausted today and hoped we could set aside a little time to think about abc - would you mind?

I have a friend who "offloads" a lot do I listen for a while and then say "shall we chat about n now?"
They say. "Yes, that's quite enough of me now".

We are quite open.
Yesterday when she called I said I couldn't ring you because I was exhausted and knew you had been through a rough time. We laughed and both left the phone much happier.

Honesty (with kindness) is best.

Give them both a God serenity notelet?
They may take more notice of something written down?

That was to Lathyrus3.

M0nica

Stop wasting your own and others time going over and over something that has happened that you can do nothing about and get on with life

Proviso: I am NOT referring to those who have suffered lifes great tragedys, like loosing your nearest and dearest, life changing injuries etc.

My interpretation too.
Some people* do themselves no good at all *constantly revisiting a past they can't change.
That's the point.
Whether offensive or not depends on the context, tone used etc.

Yes, rude and dismissive.
Have never heard it used re personal tragedy.

winterwhite

Yes, rude and dismissive.
Have never heard it used re personal tragedy.

Yes, it is, and it is generally used in the context of someone getting thoroughly irritated with someone going on over and over again about something really trivial, like breaking a finger nail

AGAA4

Get over it is dismissive and used to end discussion.

Yes, this on a news and politics type thread here. Like the occasional "get a life"

On advice threads mostly people are tactful and helpful as far as possible.

I think the phrase "get over it" always sounds dismissive and rude. I think of Brexiters who say "get over it" if anyone queries a current issue which stems from Brexit, or a discussion is started asking what we have gained from Brexit.

Especially as no-one has ever been able to give any evidence of any positive point linked to it! Some have tried, but good evidence showed that they were mistaken. (like the nonsense about the Covid vaccine).

Claremont

Especially as no-one has ever been able to give any evidence of any positive point linked to it! Some have tried, but good evidence showed that they were mistaken. (like the nonsense about the Covid vaccine).

It's over and done. Why ask?

For some here, Norah (not me) it seems it will never be over and done. I find it all very tedious, and will be jumped on for saying so.