I had a horrible day on Friday

Don't forget peepholes on doors have their uses too.

A horrible day for you, frightening and unsettling. It's no wonder you feel so sad and down. There is some good advice here - and if you have a mobile then film him when he is outside your house. Ring the police every time he makes any kind of disturbance, as this builds up a picture of what is going on. A friend had a drunk hammer at her door, and unthinkingly she opened it - and then promptly slammed it hard in his face, which prevented his getting in and also halted him in his tracks very effectively. If your neighbour tries to push in again you are within your rights to stop him, but a chain is the best idea.

friendlygingercat

I lived in a tower block when I was a student and had a scary "care in the community" neighbour. He cut through my phone wires and cut off my door knocker with a bolt cutter. When he first moved in I was foolish enough to give him money. Big mistake.

After the door knowcker incident the police arrested him and he was bailed to appear in court a few days later. Meantime he had got into a fight in the local gay village. Of course he didnt show up in court and was re-arrested for assault. He was sent to a secure hostel.

As one poster has commented these types tend to self destruct in some way and leave or get evicted.

Yep...that was me re the "self destruct" - or there's other ways too you can tell they won't be around forever.

One awful married couple were doing their best to "lord it" round the place - but they were a similar age to me I figured out (they're both people who look old for their age anyway - but she'd let on early on she was just a few months older than me). I watched him walking around with the "lurching" type of walk I notice a lot in my current area (think it's arthritis from farming jobs??), saw how they both look so much older than the age they are and that they lived in a large 3-storey house they were busily neglecting to heck. Their bad health and all that empty tatty spare space in their home and only them and their cat living there = I knew they'd probably downsize at some point and/or get caught up with for their obvious bad money management (my age and they'd had the house over 25 years - but they had both a mortgage and a charge on it as I recall). The Chavs (as I call them) didnt go far darn it - and I can see the back of the "new to them" house they moved to - but at least they aren't in my road any longer. I guess the people they owed money to and/or their health caught up with them one way or another - as anticipated.

Another bad neighbour now will soon be gone and I'm keeping my fingers crossed (as she's very elderly/obviously noticeably physically ill - as well as the dementia I can see she has). Thankfully her car has now gone - so I guess she's given up driving (ie I was worried what else she might bash with her car) - and so I did let the most amenable of the "children" know I knew she shouldnt be driving any longer and the signs I'd seen that she has dementia.

So - yep Mother Nature often catches up with these people and/or their bad money management.

Aely hi! Just to let you know that you are not alone in this. …though it may seem like it.
Keep pushing for action and keep safe. 💐 🙂

I lived in a tower block when I was a student and had a scary "care in the community" neighbour. He cut through my phone wires and cut off my door knocker with a bolt cutter. When he first moved in I was foolish enough to give him money. Big mistake.

After the door knowcker incident the police arrested him and he was bailed to appear in court a few days later. Meantime he had got into a fight in the local gay village. Of course he didnt show up in court and was re-arrested for assault. He was sent to a secure hostel.

As one poster has commented these types tend to self destruct in some way and leave or get evicted.

Our local council in association with AgeUK have a list of reliable workmen who will do small jobs such as you need. Door bell and chain. Always worth asking.

Is there an anti social behaviour unit at your local council ?
Could you contact your local councillor.
Hope things improve.

See your local MP at the surgery. Tell MP how frightened and vulnerable you feel as an elderly female living alone. MP needs to know about delay with the police, the HA being of no help. Ask MP for advice on what you must do immediately as you are very fearful, maybe even making yourself ill. Good luck and take care.

Somebody suggested having a Ring doorbell linked to my daughter's phone?
She suggested that herself, then decided that living 40 miles away, it probably wouldn't be very useful. If somebody actually tried to break in (very difficult with its small windows and internal metalwork) she could call police but they would probably take 3 hours to respond, if Friday is typical. My path is partially covered by my (deceased) neighbour's family's Ring doorbell, so could be used in that event for identifying miscreants.

Is it possible to get a wide angle peephole? My eye level is at the height of many men's chests, unless they are standing well back from the door.

Yes, I understand now Aely.

petra

Aely
If you do consider selling up are you aware that by law you must disclose all the communication you’ve had with the police and the council.

I am indeed aware of that, Petra, and have pointed this out to my daughter. She reckons it is worth the possible valuation reduction.

Allira - it is a "Wimpey no fines" construction. A thin concrete shell is filled with rubble loosely held together with cement. I had an aerial fixed up last week (thinking of dumping VM cable) and he used 8 bolts and still warned me it might fall off in a strong wind.

Other words I use for these lowlife are pondlife and Oxygen thieves

I thought it, welbeck, yesterday at 19:39!

and gave the alternative spelling: scroat

Well I never.
Who'd have thunk it ?

It's actually scrote and it's from the word scrotum.

Your scrotum is the thick-skinned pouch (sac) that hangs from the front of the pelvis below the penis. The scrotum contains the testicles (testes) and has the important job of surrounding them and keeping them safe.

Well if the police these days apparently have time to harass perfectly law-abiding people because of expressing their opinion in a tweet or something = they should have plenty of time to actually act like police (ie deal with criminals and other ne-er do wells).....

I think the police did for the idea of us having any respect for them ever again when they were doing things back in Lockdown like harassing a family into not even being able to use their own front garden!!!

vintageclassics

If you are being harrassed (i.e. banging on the door) call the police every time - if they are not there in 10 minutes call back and say you are in fear for your life - that should trigger a blue light response.

Tell them you have a gun and are ready for any intruders - they'll be there with blue lights flashing in two minutes!

You don't have to tell them it's only a water pistol.

🤞Aely for someone in authority Getting a Grip for you.

I'm so sorry you are having to desl with this. We had a spell of having bad neighbours and were planning to move within the locality to escape, but it was nothing like as bad as what you are suffering. Before we went that far my ex husband was made redundant and got a new job 50 miles away. We chose our new house carefully to avoid the shared open plan gardens that resulted in the problems. I now have lovely neighbours and got involved in neighbourhood watch, for which I'm now the road's organiser. As others have said, find other good neighbours who will support you in making complaints and give you someone local to turn to if you feel threatened again.

Our road has a WhatsApp group for all the neighbourhood watch members which I set up. It rarely is used but is handy in an emergency, such as my alarm going off when I was visiting my son's family 200 miles away! One of my neighbours checked the house and said everything was fine so I could reset the alarm on the app on my phone. Something had fallen over setting it off, but it was reassuring that there were people there for me. I too live alone, but having neighbours you can contact is important.

Aely
If you do consider selling up are you aware that by law you must disclose all the communication you’ve had with the police and the council.

Maybe as an excuse

What is it about our age? I”m 80 and we just did not have this disgusting behaviour when in our teens and twenties. What has happened to our country? Why do we say now these hooligans have MH, maybe as nan excuse when it isn't, it’s just lack of decent upbringing and manners. We have a generation, not all, of youngsters, and older, who think they are entitled.

Well done - your persistence paid off. I hope there will be some action to resolve this awful situation.

Would you consider getting a smart phone.
You could get a basic Chinese one from argos. My brother did. Under 200 pounds and does what he wants.
Or if not how about a simple cctv system like entryphone bell.
Or have the ri g doorbell relay to your daughter's smart phone?
Never open the door.
Shout through it and say sorry am busy with my toy boy. He's a martial arts instructor and is shewing me some moves.

Hi Aely. How awful this has been for you and quite frightening. Like others have said get your home secure, strong chain and also on your back door. You do not have to answer. Don't worry about calling the police just do it if you are getting harassment.
As for the HA they will have a protocol for anti social behaviour and should ask you to keep a diary. Someone in breach of their tenancy should be given a written warning and the HA can apply to the Court for possession. Should the lady pass away from her illness then the son will have to go
I do wish you well.