Should I say something?

It's early days for this lady - just over a year.

Maybe you could gently say: "The sad details of your OH's death do seem to be uppermost in your mind all the time. Are there any things that might help you to move on that we could help with?"

I sympathise with Aveline. We all face bereavement and many of us are widowed. We need good deep friends to lean on hard through acute times. But grief also needs to have public guardrails or nothing would function. I don't think the answer is to 'put up' with this poor woman and treat her as though her loss trumps everyone else's.
She is clearly a bit out of balance. I think that crises, losses, deaths all accentuate the character of the person. This lady may already be someone who lacks self awareness. If the OP is close enough to her think about talking to her about it. If not, then let her be. Social situations usually sort themselves out x

I know someone similar whose husband died about a year ago, and sadly she just repeatedly talks at people, who are often strangers. She is alienating people and they are now actively avoiding her.
Unfortunately she doesn’t benefit from the unloading, unlike if she was talking to a counsellor when they might ask her to talk about her feelings and help her to move on and adjust.
She is obviously lonely and I’ve suggested social groups and volunteering opportunities.

Good advice Franski Well put.

Sparky51

Nice comment

'Ignorant' used in the sense of uninformed, unaware.

I did have a chat with her this morning and suggested that she go back to the counsellor but she just batted the suggestion aside and continued to talk about how lonely she was.

Aveline

I did have a chat with her this morning and suggested that she go back to the counsellor but she just batted the suggestion aside and continued to talk about how lonely she was.

Well you tried.

Aveline

I did have a chat with her this morning and suggested that she go back to the counsellor but she just batted the suggestion aside and continued to talk about how lonely she was.

I think you have done all you can do. You can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped. A lady died aged 99, of my close acquaintance, who lost her husband too soon and all her beloved sisters, years before she died, had an expression, "Life is for the living". It basically means enjoy your own life now and don't let time pass you by. I would try to avoid social occasions she attends and just try to put her out of my mind.

There’s really no easy answer here but she is in danger of losing the few friends she has, as people will inevitably lose sympathy with her.

On a practical level, is there a "leader" of the group as such, either yourself Aveline or another member who often takes the lead?

If so, maybe a suggestion from them that future chats would be within a timed framework, such as the spoon idea - whoever holds the spoon has the turn to speak with the spoon passing on at the end of an allotted time.

It doesn't need to be a permanent thing as it might not work in a chat group over time but a few sessions might just break the cycle of her domineering the whole of the conversation.

Best wishes in a very difficult situation, suffering grief is terrible thing.

We all handle grief and bereavement differently but I do also acknowledge that we all handle is differently in situations as they arise. Sadly this friend see the social occasions as an outlet for her to share her grief with little regard to what others might be going through and I would kindly suggest that when this person takes control of the conversation someone gently says ‘why don’t we talk about the plans for out next outing ‘ or something similar and divert the conversation assertively and deliberately.
I’m not saying that grief becomes easier but I do know that my lovely friends don’t want to hear about my mums untimely and horrendous death every time we meet up for coffee.