In recent years there are just the two of us on Christmas Day, and after church we have a light lunch, like a starter course, then I cook something like a small turkey crown or a roast chicken to eat around 5 pm. DH then goes away on Boxing Day for a few days to visit his daughter, so I don’t want too many leftovers, as hopefully I will get invited to my son and daughter for meals over the following days.
This year my daughter has invited us to hers for a late lunch on Christmas Day. Her in laws will also be there, 6 of them!
I really want to spend time with my grandchildren So I want to go, but DH doesn’t. He doesn’t want to eat there ( he has choking and swallowing difficulties) and hates having to be sociable.
I asked him what would make it ok for him to go and he said No meal, and no other people to have to be sociable with. So he agreed he would be happy to go for a couple of hours mid afternoon. Now the in-laws will be gone by then, and my daughter has already expressed huge relief that they aren’t staying long, so that they can be on their own as a family. I don’t know if I can dare to intrude on that family time by asking to visit at a separate time from the in laws. Also I feel I am missing out and so are the grandchildren if the visitors are all their step father’s relatives. I am trying to think this one through, to try not to upset anyone.
As an alternative DH has said I can go by myself and he will cook his own dinner, but I don’t want to do that. We need some time together as he is going away the next day. I know you can’t please all of the people all of the time, but I want to cause as few problems as possible. It is complicated.