How about a thread for those on their own at christmas

I m not on my own, almost, but not quite my eldest daughter s on her own so we are joining forces so I don’t qualify but I just wanted to say what a great idea for a thread and to all those completely on their own I m sure many of us will be around for a chat

I think that many people who are not perhaps physically on their own still feel lonely and this could be a safe place to meet up and talk through whatever is on our minds?

I think there’s already a ‘Christmas party’ thread for people who are alone over Christmas.
Can I just say though, that public chat rooms are not ‘safe spaces’ - anyone can read what you’re saying.

I do agree you can feel lonely in a crowd, I experienced this the other night on an outing with my grown up grandchildren all in relationships arm in arm with children wives and partners I found myself walking ahead alone and no one seemed to notice, I really wanted someone to notice (selfish) me I should of been happy for all of them enjoying themselves. I won’t be alone over Christmas and for that I’m grateful.

Tanith, I know exactly how you feel. I quite often feel like that when out with family who are all grown up and couples. I also get the feeling sometimes that if I just walked away, no one would notice.

I don't think the Party Thread is only for people on their own or lonely.

We usually have lots of family here but, because there are lots of bugs about and I have an operation booked for 6th January, we will be on our own. I'm lucky that I still have DH but will miss the mayhem.

I saw the pitying look on somebody's face the other day when I was asked what I was doing, and I said spending Christmas on my own as usual.
I have lovely food lined up, and more importantly, it has all been stress-free. I can do what I want when I want.

It has been like this for around 8 years and I have settled into a comfortable routine of doing very little. It may not suit many but I am stress-free and still with some money in the bank.

Just a bit amused that the posts on here so far are all from people who are not on their own.

Perhaps not the best thread for people who really are on their own?

Good luck for January 6th kittylester. I’ll be with my daughter and grandchildren and her in-laws but I often think it is only one day really and on my own I would just eat favourite foods, drink favourite booze and indulge myself. Not as nice as sharing with loved ones of course but a bit of private cheer.

I was typing when you posted Charleygirl, 🙂

I'm really on my own and would like a thread. I feel OK about it actually but would still welcome one.

Charleygirl5

I saw the pitying look on somebody's face the other day when I was asked what I was doing, and I said spending Christmas on my own as usual.
I have lovely food lined up, and more importantly, it has all been stress-free. I can do what I want when I want.

It has been like this for around 8 years and I have settled into a comfortable routine of doing very little. It may not suit many but I am stress-free and still with some money in the bank.

My thoughts exactly. I will be on my own on Christmas Day by choice for the third year running. I will eat a baked Camembert with garlic bread followed by home made trifle. All family are grown up and prefer money for presents, so I have had no shopping to do - bliss! I don't even bother with decorations apart from a homemade ribbon wreath on the door which comes out every year.
Happy Christmas to all GNetters, hope you have the day you wish for.

I was going to be on my own but was invited to a friends to join a lunch for all the women she knows who are also on their own. Could be fun?
I'm bringing a veggie dish and wine. Others are bringing puddings.

I wasn't too bothered about being on my own like Charleygirl and have just invited myself to DSs this evening to deliver gifts.

The young electrician who has been here all morning upgrading my fuses, was very chirpy about working all through the Christmas time.
He proudly told me he'd probably get early call outs tomorrow. He genuinely sounded pleased to be useful. Nice.

I think it's just those attacks of nostalgia which come out of the blue which are scary. Tears fill my eyes as I romanticise all those wonderful Christmasses I've lived through.
And some pretty awful ones too! 😅😄🤣

My grandson is on duty at the hospital all day tomorrow and Boxing Day. Long,long shifts.

Sallywally1

I think that many people who are not perhaps physically on their own still feel lonely and this could be a safe place to meet up and talk through whatever is on our minds?

Very true Sallywally. One can be lonely in a crowd.
I feel that when families and friends meet at Christmas, each person should aim to speak only if what is said is what the other person would enjoy to hear.

Charleygirl5

I saw the pitying look on somebody's face the other day when I was asked what I was doing, and I said spending Christmas on my own as usual.
I have lovely food lined up, and more importantly, it has all been stress-free. I can do what I want when I want.

It has been like this for around 8 years and I have settled into a comfortable routine of doing very little. It may not suit many but I am stress-free and still with some money in the bank.

It is bad manners to ineffectually pity someone . Nobody enjoys to be pitied.

Forewarned is forearmed. I'd say "I always leave it to the last minute before I decide what I will do." Then not answer any more of her intrusive questions. Take a deep breath and smile.

I haven't told people. I don't want invites, I've a heavy lurgy and have been over busy, much to think over as the year comes to an end, and I love musical company and there will be some family phone calls/face time.

Do you want to share what you have had to think over?
For the past two weeks I myself have had weighty matters to think over and decide on.

There are some matters that are not suited to discussion with all and sundry.

When people ask what I'm doing at Xmas - very much in the manner of some local government jobsworth who reckons they have a right to know - and I reply "just the everyday stuff", they often irritatingly tilt their head to one side and say 'awwww!", and that's when I wish I had a big, wet fish to hand to slap them silly with.

And then I'd need the nerve to use it.

But, hey, I can fantasise.........

When I moaned about anything my grandad used to say ‘well it’s better than a slap across the belly with a wet fish’ I love that saying

I hate that pitying look, people can assume that I am lonely on my own. That is their problem, not mine. They have no idea, I am very content, I have lovely siblings and AC and DGC, we speak every day and I have a lot of hobbies and activities, indoors and outdoors

A brand new neighbour, friendly enough, been here two weeks, we are a quiet, self-contained community. It is as though he is trying to push himself into the community, not having the empathy to realise that it takes time. His wife was more intuitive, she stayed in her house after a quick `good morning`

On his third visit to my front door in two weeks, his first words were `what are you doing for Christmas?` he said this while coughing and spluttering. I never invite neighbours in just because they live close by. I invite only those whose friendship has evolved over the years. So we had that chat outside, even though I was freezing and he was wrapped up. See the lack of empathy

I am completely with those above, I just wish I could be quick with a response, not to hurt but to make them go away

Best of luck Kitty for your hospital visit. No doubt you and hubby will have a a relaxed (occasional bevy) and nice food at Christmas. 🍹🍷

If you are alone at Xmas and you want to have a really laugh out loud, this takes some beating 😂
I can’t count how many times I’ve watched it but it still makes me howl with laughing.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=dpsXNlarAk8

Hopefully this can be a thread for anyone who wants company tomorrow. I'll check in. Happy Christmas Gnetters, you have made me laugh, think, wince and wonder. Really love dipping in and out of this group of wise and wonderful women (and a few blokes!) X