Gransnet forums


Denture and a date - Help!

(75 Posts)
Deni1963 Thu 15-Mar-18 13:15:15

So Ive been chatting to a lovely man 61 - I'm 54. He is funny, charming and makes me smile.
He is driving down Saturday night to meet. And staying over night in a very lovely hotel which has the best restaurant here, so he doesn't have to worry about having a few glasses of wine.
My question is I'm nervous. I have a partial denture with plate. And if we became intimate in the future I'm worried. I haven't told him.
He admits he is a little superficial - do you think I should tell him before anything happens? Or would he not notice.... anyone else been in a similar situation? 😣

OldMeg Thu 15-Mar-18 13:37:20

Denil forget your dentures. Just enjoy his company, or not, as the case may be. Don’t overthink things.

Sazz1006 Thu 15-Mar-18 13:55:11

I’m with OldMeg on this. Don’t overthink it, enjoy your date and think of it as a nice night out even if it turns out that he’s not you were hoping he would be. I did years of internet dating and it didn’t occur to me to worry on the first date about what may or may not be on view if there was development of the relationship. Have you done internet dating before?

Deni1963 Thu 15-Mar-18 14:03:53

No never! But what if we kiss? God. This sucks.

OldMeg Thu 15-Mar-18 14:07:27

Isn’t there some kind of adhesive you can use?

I’ve not idea if a plate is kiss proof! Come on you snogging grans with dentures, help this lady out! 🤔🙄

Sazz1006 Thu 15-Mar-18 14:14:39

The best thing to do is put your worries to one side and enjoy the date. Are you worried he may be able to tell you have a denture if you have a kiss? What sort of kiss are you expecting grin.?
Just a word of warning from someone who has been on nearly 30 internet dates - it can be so easy to expect to fall instantly for the person you’ve built up such a great online rapport with when you meet but it can be a bit of a letdown. Out of all my dates, there was only 1 that I really liked and he didn’t like me! Like I said before, just enjoy the experience of getting ready for a date but don’t overthink it. Let us know how it goes!

Sazz1006 Thu 15-Mar-18 14:17:11

Re the denture-I had a partial denture prior to having an implant and my hubby certainly never noticed it! Fixodent is your friend!

Deni1963 Thu 15-Mar-18 14:35:25

Thanks girls. Yes 1st Internet date and we will see. We both seem to like each other and have talked a lot on the phone.
Hi Sazz - really? Even kissing? If all goes well then yes I'd like a good snog! Just nerous as hell and wondering whether to say nothing or be upfront should things develop.

Sazz1006 Thu 15-Mar-18 14:46:14

Nope, he never noticed although obviously he knew 😬. I used to keep it in all the time until it was time for sleep and then would pop it in the pot at the side of the bed and pop it back in when the alarm went off!

Deni1963 Thu 15-Mar-18 18:57:02

That is reassuring although I only take mine out to be cleaned etc - I'm hoping one day to afford the implants - real confidence knock Sazz

farview Thu 15-Mar-18 19:08:01

My best friend (denture wearing) met her now husband 3yrs ago on a dating site and they are so happy, forget about the denture,take it one step at a time.. enjoy yourself 😃

Coolgran65 Thu 15-Mar-18 19:28:59

I wear my denture all the time. Forget about it. Enjoy yourself 👍

Willow500 Thu 15-Mar-18 21:01:13

I never took my denture out apart from cleaning. I had one from 14 so was wearing it when I met my husband 49 years ago it was never a problem. Enjoy your date and forget your teeth (apart from the obvious checking for cabbage grin )

Suki70 Thu 15-Mar-18 21:26:16

There's no need at all to mention the denture. For all you know he may have full dentures! Have a lovely time and hope all goes well.

Yellowmellow Fri 16-Mar-18 10:00:14

I haven't got dentures, but think there is adhesive you can use??. Don't mention the denture. Just enjoy his company. If the relationship develops and he cares about you....a denture shouldn't matter. I'm sure at his age he has something going on he is apprehensive about! If he is that superficial that a denture bothers him....let him jog on!

harrysgran Fri 16-Mar-18 10:00:32

So glad you asked this question I have a partial denture I've had it around a year and I must admit it knocked my confidence a bit it made me feel like an old lady (😅) I would love to dip my toe in the water and try internet dating but I'm not that brave well done you.

Teddy123 Fri 16-Mar-18 10:04:06

Snap! It's all very well being told don't worry about it but like you, I do!!! The last time I snogged someone, I surreptitiously removed mine & shoved it in my handbag.
My denture is some expensive 'private' contraption with metal plate. Very secure but just vile!
Saving up for implants!
It's just not a subject one tends to drop into a normal conversation. Do let us know how you coped!

Happyscotlass Fri 16-Mar-18 10:09:06

I'm sure your friend will be very nervous and will be more worried about what you think of him. I met my DH on the internet 8 years ago and we have been married for 3 years very happily. By the way my DH has no upper front teeth. (Knocked out by playing rugby in his youth) it didn't put me off even a little bit.wink

grannytotwins Fri 16-Mar-18 10:21:05

He might have dentures too! I had a partial denture before I had implants and spent a fortune on Fixodent, but I did feel self-conscious. Implants are expensive, but so worth it. Some dentists do interest free credit.

Lynnebo Fri 16-Mar-18 10:23:37

You don’t have to tell him ever! Honest!

Musicelf Fri 16-Mar-18 10:23:53

I've had full dentures for many, many years due to various circumstances, and - like you - was worried when I started dating again at 50.

Several dates in, we'd talked so much that we knew everything about each other, but he'd never noticed that I wore dentures. I plucked up courage and told him; his response was to take my face in his hands and kiss me.

And yes, readers, I married him. grin grin

Gilly1952 Fri 16-Mar-18 10:27:47

Deni1963 Try not to worry too much about your denture. Us women have so many insecurities about our bodies, etc but I am sure men have these worries too, they just don’t talk about them like we do! In the past I have been on many internet dates - oh the stories I could tell, I think I should write a book! If your date goes well and you like each other and things do progress to a more intimate level, he will probably be much more anxious than you - worried whether he will be able to “rise to the occasion” and so on!! Have a lovely date and keep us all posted. Good Luck xx

Marieeliz Fri 16-Mar-18 10:31:52

I have a bridge which I was told in 2006, would not last, dentist said I should have dentures. I have a horror of them because he also told me that they would need to be removed regularly to let the gums breath. Hence 12 years later I am still wearing temporary bridge. I was also told, although I already have two implants, that because of my age there would not be enough bone to do implant dentures.

If anyone knows different let me know.

Greciangirl Fri 16-Mar-18 10:33:28

Well, after my husband died, I met a man who was very passionate, and of course, we kissed, a lot.

I have a partial plate and was very conscious of the fact.
I felt incredibly nervous the first time we kissed but I don't think he noticed.
A little while into the relationship, he mentioned he had a dental checkup and (all his own teeth) said, "I can't stand false teeth" well, that really shocked my confidence and I never felt the same about him after that, although we did continue to see each other for a while.

But I see no reason why you should even mention this to your date, Denil. It's not something you bring up on a first date.
Just go with the flow and suss him out.
He probably won't want a full blown snog right away I would imagine.

Theoddbird Fri 16-Mar-18 10:37:36

If he really likes you he won't care. Just enjoy your date and don't worry x