Do you ever feel this will never be over?

Actually most of the population are adhering to the lockdown and all this talk about idiots being out and about really isn’t helpful. If lockdown isn’t eased soon in some way, people will start to rebel. Just listened to David Blunkett on R4 on the very subject and he’s calling for balance. We can’t let the lives of huge numbers of people be ruined by indefinite lockdown.

I'm feeling like you Coolgran. I mostly follow my Chinese friends online and get hope from their lives returning to normal. But the news everyday disproves my hope. Things here are so much worse. So many idiots still out and about. No testing. HOW will we ever get on top of it?

If I felt we were all fighting it together, I'd feel better. But a lot of the population aren't and they're increasing the infection and death count, and extending the lockdown.

My cottage overlooks a small harbour. I am sitting at the window eating breakfast already three boats not locals have left loaded with picnic baskets. I am dreading today I fear an lnflux of people.it scares me to think of them contaminating our little village. Its only 8.30am and already iam panicking.

I think at a time like this, when we're facing something previously unknown and frightening, we go through the whole rollercoaster of emotions.
At first people were sending jokes and we did have some good laughs, then the songs, some better than others. Pictures of people's spring gardens were such a contrast to what is going on in the outside world.
The news brought the tears and fear for our loved ones and knowing that some were going to work in ICUs brought more anxiety and, I must admit, more tears.

That's probably not helping, I am usually a Pollyanna too, Luckygirl.

It will end but it’ll be a long road. Hopefully the young can get back to a semblance of a normal life soon and then the rest of us can follow. My 20 year old daughter is home from uni and working in Tesco and very sad she can’t see her boyfriend. Who knows what will happen with regards to her studies. It’s much harder for her than it is for me.

A vaccine will be available and then we can really beat it. And other drugs to help treat the disease. So at the very least we have the certainty of that, even if it’s a long way off. And at the same time governments need to put huge pressure on places like China to ban the dreadful wet markets where this pandemic started (and others before it). Because if they don’t, this will happen again.

I hope this morning you are feeling a bit better Starblaze?

I was thinking earlier that us oldies will be the last ones to come out of lockdown and in my case it would be with much trepidation. We have been stuck in for 4 weeks now and here in Spain the public aren’t even allowed out for a daily walk. It’s lockdown on steroids here.

I read this morning that an Oxford university scientist is 80% hopeful of an effective vaccine being available this autumn, which is something us oldies will be needing.

Some of those flouting the rules and making pathetic excuses and rationalisations seem to be staunch supporters of this government, which is a bit weird

I don’t think these reckless teenagers in the news who have been congregating with their mates in public spaces have any political allegiances growstuff!

I’m sorry if this sounds more depressing, but at the start of all this Chris Whitty was speaking about the measures that needed to be taken to reduce the UK death toll, and he was quoting 20,000 as a best case scenario.
I thought at the time, no way, but.....

I had a wobble last week too. Sat in our garden full of spring flowers in the sun with bird song all around and wept. Its the not knowing and helplessness that gets to me. Not being able to plan or look forward. We’re all in limbo. Suspended in time. The Virus is so ethereal. Invisible. It’s nothing anyone seems to be able to positively fight, sort out or solve.

I think I’m coming out of the Fight stage and accepting the Freeze position. Yesterday I felt quite Zen-ish.

Those of us over 70 or vulnerable for other reasons may have to accept that we are in this for the long term. This virus is not going to go away, or that is unlikely at least. It might mutate into a less virulent form but hasn’t done so yet.

I’m watching with interest how China copes with the easing of their lockdown. I notice they are testing extensively and isolating those who carry the disease but are asymptomatic. This is obviously to stop a new wave of infection.

If lockdown is staggered, as I suspect it will be, then it will be the young and those who have already had the virus who will be ‘released’ first.

Then there is the big question - how long will immunity last? I fear we will not get back to a more normal life until a vaccine is available and that is a long way away.

Don't be ashamed of thoughts Coolgran Somebody suggested to me that we ae going through a sort of collective Flight, Fight, Freeze reaction. I found it an interesting idea.

If you can dig deep and find positives, good for you. If you have a bad day, so be it.

The sheer madness of the past few weeks has caused each of us to question what we had viewed as the reality of our lives. We wash, isolate, cling to tv news even if it might not be accurate reporting, miss loved ones, worry if something as mundane as toilet paper will be available next week. Surely, depression is felt by each of us. There is no right or wrong way to react. Get rest, eat healthy, be gentle with your self-talk as well as others, make sure you laugh at least once a day. You are one day closer to a new reality that may be even better than the past.

Don't feel ashamed of your thoughts Coolgran. I've been a lifelong insomniac and am often creeping around when most of the rest of the country is asleep.

On the whole, I've been coping well with the "lockdown", although I did have a wobble last week. Strangely enough, I don't think it all bothers me as much as it does some other people because I don't have a lot to lose. The last ten years of my life have been a nightmare and I've already learnt to cope with the sense of loss which people are experiencing now.

I had been saying to my husband about how well we were coping after 3 weeks of isolation. Going out for a walk is really just a dander as his legs get painful from vascular disease. my feet get sore from neuropathy but we do whatever we can for about 45 minutes. Each day we make a point of getting some chores done that are not day to day stuff. And each day I try to make sure that dinner is very different from the day before to keep it interesting. Yesterday was pasta and meatballs in a tomato and basil sauce. Today was chicken thighs in a chassis sauce with mashed potatoes and sprouts. Tomorrow it's just BLT in a ciabatta roll. The following will be sausage, eggs and chips. I have to think ahead as most everything is frozen. We haven't had any harsh words, we never do. And isolation hasn't changed that (so far ?). I do knitting, sudoko, crosswords and read a lot as well as tv. Ds and I always have an on line scramble game on the go. Dh misses his bowls but is a square eyed tv watcher and can always find an old Liverpool match to watch.
Family keep in touch and will do anything for us.
We are comfortable and coping well.....

I spoke too soon....... Why tonight does it feel overwhelming. I feel nervous and afraid. What if something happened to our son and family on the other side of the world? Or the other one at the other side of the UK. 2 others live locally.

I have ongoing medical conditions all of which are in the vulnerable category and together with my age I'm pretty sure would put me second choice for a ventilator. It's not the thought of being ill that troubles me so much as never seeing some of my dc or dgc again before I go.

No idea why tonight is so different.

I'm an insomniac and get about 3 hours sleep each night. Had an MRI a month ago and got a further referral from neurologist to respiratory physician. Not a lot of chance in seeing respiratory in the foreseeable future.
All this is going through my head tonight, it's 2.30am and I'll probably get to bed for a couple of hours sleep about 8am. That's the usual pattern.

I know full well that I am better off than many, all the poor people fighting for their lives as I write this. People who are alone in their home.

It really was only as I went to bed earlier that this came over me. Dh was kidding and said....only another 9 weeks or so to go. And I thought.... it will be a lot longer than that.

Sorry I'm rambling here.
No doubt the cloud will have left me tomorrow and I'll feel ashamed of my thoughts tonight.

I will go now and see if I can get an Asda delivery slot.
Tomorrow is a new day.

To anyone else up and about tonight I hope you find sleep soon.

BTW It would be downright foolish to deny that Germany has better treatment than the UK and to accuse its figures of looking good because it doesn't include certain deaths. The UK doesn't include certain deaths either. I was appalled that nobody would give the number of deaths of NHS workers at yesterday's briefing.

The main reason Germany has a lower death rate then most other countries is that it carries out more tests and detects more cases. Therefore, the percentage of those who die is lower. The overall number of deaths is, at the moment, lower because Germany has better facilities. Even Germany acknowledges this could rise and is nervous.

The truth is that Germany has been more pro-active, started testing earlier, tests more, enforces a strict lockdown and has more ICU facilities.

morethan Be grateful you don't live in South Africa, where the sale of cigarettes and alcohol has effectively been banned.

BTW Some of those flouting the rules and making pathetic excuses and rationalisations seem to be staunch supporters of this government, which is a bit weird.

I wonder if that's because some people don't really care about the common good or understand the concept of public health and whether there's a correlation with political leanings.

Sussexborn The UK isn't reporting all the deaths of people with comordities either. Some of those highly suspected of having Covid-19 weren't even tested if they died at home or in a care home, so there's underreporting in the UK too.

We won't know until the excess deaths compared with previous years for the same weeks/months are compared and assumptions can be made.

It's quite a sobering thought SueDonim and I agree with you. I used to be a family history buff until I just hit too many brick walls. I have whole family branches which were just snuffed out.

I wonder if we've all become a little too complacent and arrogant to think that somehow we've overcome nature. I think there will be a profound thinking about priorities.

forebears

I’m on a specialist family history website, which has insights into the lives of our ancestors. This current situation mirrors what our forbears experienced in days gone by. I’ve read of families losing four, five or more children in as little as a week to diphtheria, and the terrors of scarlet fever, typhoid and all the rest cutting swathes through communities.

I wondered how they bore it, not imagining we would soon be in a similar place. Many more people then had the comfort of religion, I suppose, which not so many of us have now.

morethan, I was going through what you are going through this time last year. DH and I often say, 'How on earth would we cope if it was now??'

The better may be a long time coming. I wish you strength to shoulder your burden and send love xx

Germany are only reporting people who were fit and well as COVID deaths. Anyone who had underlying conditions had the initial illness put down as the cause of death so the figures are not remotely comparable. Making sense of it all afterwards is going to be a devilish job and I am not sure how it can be done.

The number of deaths in the U.K. is worrying but they said earlier that the number of new cases has dropped which is encouraging but too early to call yet.

It’s not easy for any of us having to obey the isolating rules and obviously more so for those filled with bitterness and anger against the current government eating them up. Such a destructive emotion to live with.

I think none of us will be quite the same ever again honestly but let's hope we can all come out of it a little better

I don't think I'll ever feel safe again.

I think that is actually true but can't find the source. However, even taking that into account they are still doing much better than we are and have sent us 60 ventilators. And remember that we are only counting the numbers dying in hospital also.