I suspect that the choice you make has a lot to do with character
Not forgetting circumstances Whitewave .
My father coped alone up to the age of 88 after Mum died, with a carer twice a day to help with cleaning, laundry and meals, but eventually rang me (at work) one day to say he was not coping and to find him a place in one of the two care homes in his town.
I’m not saying they were ideal, but kind and caring.
There was nothing else I could have done living 350 miles away in full time work and with a husband who had had a transplant. I went up to Scotland every half term and school holiday but it was a full day’s drive to get there so even weekends were impossible. My sister lived in Canada and Dad would never have left Scotland.
It was his character that made him independent but also his common sense that made him realise things could not continue as they were.
So don’t dismiss those who go into residential care as lacking in character.
And do not write off all care homes as being the same - there are all degrees of good, bad and indifferent.
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