If nothing else the pandemic has reminded us that life can be short. Although we have a Will, I feel there is more that I need to do to get my affairs in good order so I am looking for advice.....

travelsafar, POA is very important and should be up there with a current will. It isn`t any good leaving it because it needs to be done while one still has the ability to decide. My solicitor checked me out when she did mine, I could see her weighing up that my mental capacity is good. It might never be used but is a very important safety net for us, while we are alive

All this overwhelms me. I have done my will and paid for my funeral. Other than that nothing. I have just ordered one of the Life Books fromAge UK using the link someone put up in this post.

Look up ‘Swedish Death Clean’. Tells you all you need to know about getting things in order.

Since the recent sudden loss of my darling husband I have made sure all my information is on hand for my ACs,bank details/Insurance policies for house and animals/dates for any standing orders/water/gas/electric account numbers etc and passwords to any forums I use on a regular basis.
My DD has been informed where everything is stored so she will be able to go straight to things when needed.

I have made a file called `dying tidy` I was always the one who dealt with all financial affairs, then I became widowed and did probate. Probate opened my eyes about how important it is to have all the details in one place. My AC would not have a clue about where to look

I have two good zipped conference folders, one contains all the day to day stuff like car details, energy suppliers etc The other contains the extra things like pensions, bank accounts, insurances, my will and POA etc. Both these folders are in a medium sized suitcase plus some cash, enough for immediate expenses. Some things need immediate payment eg death certificates and executors have expenses eg travel.

These folders both have index cards so everything is easy to access and anything that needs a phone number has that number written on it

Have all accounts in joint names , contact credit card companies and agree the other partner can deal on their behalf if needed . Same for gas , electricity etc.. Lasting power of attorney , up to date wills and leave a note of all accounts held , national savings and so on so that someone can sort them out . Tell all your family what kind of funeral you want .

I have just received a copy of the AgeUK Life book all I need to do now is fill it in!

This might be helpful in marshalling your thoughts.

www.ageuk.org.uk/information-advice/care/housing-options/home-safety/lifebook/

As my husband died earlier this year, not Covid related, I have made sure that my executors know where everything is, one-stop folder listing investments, accounts etc. and passwords so they can access on-line information. When he died I pulled up a spread-sheet to show my daughter and was able to deal with probate, trusts etc., she did comment that had I gone first he would have been stuffed, which is perfectly true!
I intend editing a lot of stuff too, don't want them seeing some of the naughty pics from our youth, especially the videos that I only remembered recently!
Remember that after a death no-one is allowed access to a person's social media accounts without passwords so if you want them to have this then they will need the passwords.

I have a file on an external hard disk that my son knows about and has the password for.

There I have listed all our bank accounts, insurance policies, and told him where to find the deeds of the house, our will etc.

I have also stipulated what I want done with various possessions that it troubles me to think might just be thrown out.

Attending to this, I realised that now was the time to check whether there are letters etc. lying around that I don't want other people to read ever.

Our will also states our wishes regarding funerals and makes provision for any pets that might survive us.

I can't pretend it is pleasant attending to all this, but I have felt so much better after I sorted it all out.

OP, it sounds to me as if your DH is young enough to at least learn how to pay your utility bills, and if you still have children who are minors, perhaps you should teach him how to cook and put on the washing machine. If this isn't feasible, pay the billls by direct debit from an account in both your names, as I do. I got the bank to check my budget and work out with me how much money to transfer into the joint account each month.

Our eldest is returning home for health and economics reasons. She`s 48 and sees herself with us long term.

This doesn't bother us at all, as we have a bedsit upstairs in our bungalow...in fact it was built for her when she was 16! Hubby`s busy freshening it up.

So here`s where my comments tie in to this thread..........
We have no life insurance nor funeral plans. So I`m looking into the monthly funeral plans. As we are in our late 60s and early 70s, it isn't cheap.

Have you thought about this?

I am up to date on the financial side but not with everything else.
My worry is DH as he is so uncommunicative. I know he has a small part ownership of a property which was his mother’s and pays various expenses in connection with that, but no idea what.

Yes Bitofayear definitely update your will. A handbook of information for your Executors will also be useful. As others have said details of banks accounts, assets, insurance policies etc will help. As will what funeral arrangements you would like. Mr J is currently putting together information for me on practical things around the house such as where the stop cock is (sad but I really don't know) how to set the boiler and change the clock on it etc. Anything which will be of help to you is worth dealing with now for peace of mind in the future,

I'm always decluttering my own stuff and also 'joint' stuff but how can I get DH to declutter HIS stuff? He's not into throwing anything out and neither were his parents, so he has cupboards full of god-knows-what. He says not to worry, the kids can sort it out when we've gone as payment for their inheritance. The Age UK book sounds like a good idea, I'm getting stressed just thinking about it though.

Is anyone else going round in circles trying to order an Age UK booklet? I wanted the emailed one so that I could complete it and send one each to my children, but when I order one I get an email which is not the document but another link to order the booklet.

I must be doing something wrong, but it’s driving me mad.

Elegran Just ordered it, this discussion reminded me, it’s been on a ‘to do’ list for ages! I had one a few years ago, got shoved in a drawer and subsequently lost..could do better...

Jackb The Age UK Lifebook is what you need, though that won't help you get through to Mr JB that he is not immortal. Order an extra booklet for him?

I'm working on drawing up a will, but I would appreciate it if there was a checklist you could download somewhere (like for organising weddings, moving house etc) with suggestions for making a list of other things to do to prepare for my death.

E. g. cancel magazine subscriptions, adresses of people to be informed, Banks, memberships, insurances, etc.

A handbook on how to run the household is a good idea!

I would also appreciate tips on how to break it to DH that he is not immortal. Even when I've done some decluttering I find he has retrieved things I've thrown out from the dustbin and hidden them in the shed.

What about powers of attorney? If you become incapacitated you will require someone to act on your behalf in regards to finances.

Then there's a living will. That allows you to indicate how you wish to be treated medically should you be incapacitated. Not legally binding but family and medical staff will hopefully take into account your wishes.

Then your funeral. Specify your wishes to prevent family members having that awful job of deciding what you would have wanted.

A will so that your assets are distributed as you wish.

A list of all your bank accounts, shares pensions, etc.

A list of all your regular outgoings, house insurance, car insurance, power company, maintenance contracts, etc.

Have I missed anything?

I have been procrastinating about so many of the items on this list. I find it daunting to be honest.

Thats good of age uk

I haven't documented my stocks and shares yet (lol)

However my gas and electricity bills are lined up

and my credit union loan card is in the right place...

lol

Crossed posts, Jaxjacky I hope you have filled yours in - I haven't yet!

Age UK have a free Lifebook booklet in which you can fill in all kinds of details which may be useful to those who will be sorting things out after you go. It is divided up into different topics. Just reading through all the sections reminds you what needs to be done.

It can be ordered at www.ageuk.org.uk/information-advice/care/housing-options/home-safety/lifebook/

I made an up-to-date will at the start of the pandemic, and I decluttered hugely when I moved a couple of years ago. I’ve written some extra information and that is stored with my will, stuff like passwords for my laptop etc. The kids (all adults) know what’s in the will, we have discussed it, and they all agree it’s fair. I suppose from that point of view, I’m as prepared for death as I could be.

The advantage of getting all this stuff done now is that I don’t have to worry about it.

AgeUK will send a free Lifebook to keep all your information in one place.

The DC can take their pick and ditch the rest.
If I'm not there, I can't worry about it, can I?