The Lockdown Gang - Indomitable Lobstars ?⭐️

Dear Panache what a crushing time you're having, when the outside world takes over and you struggle to connect together. My heart goes out to you both. Tell the helpers that you need some time alone together every day just to be together. God bless.

Panache I hope you don’t mind but I know you have many friends in Soop’s kitchen so I have posted a little of what you have written in there. Many are thinking of you. x

Oh dear Panache your last post was so full of hope with dear MrP being pain free. I am so sorry that blissful state did not last long and he is now suffering again.
I am glad you have help on hand but you sound so tired and worn down by it all. I wish with all my heart you have some peaceful time together. I am so sorry things have come to this and wish we could help.
Of course we understand you not posting. There must be no time in the day to think let alone anything else. You are both in my thoughts and prayers. x

Panache That is so sad and I’m so sorry. Thinking of you both.

When my dear man returned from Hospital relatively painfree I was so delighted,thinking we would enjoy a further pleasing time together.
Sadly this was very short lived and life has almost lost much of the hope we both have held uppermost.
Because of the intense pain relief...........and still needing top ups,there is little time for anything bar seeing to his comfort,his well being,,meals and all the rest.....and forever on the `phone.
Help is now coming in thick and fast,much equipment to make my beloved as comfy as possable,District Nurses as well as our Palliative care nurse,the Home Hospice team as well as dear friends are standing by us.
I am completely overwhelmed and oh! so desperately tired.
Seeing and witnessing my dearest failing is unbearable,witnessing his sheer helplessness after showing such bravery and determination to fight on truly is very hard to bare.
Life at this stage is so very cruel.

We both seem at different stages .........each fighting with all their might in their own way to save the day.............but in reality.......... it is simply dividing us.
No time to simply enjoy time together now.

I have no time to spare so please understand why I am away so much.

Good evening my friends.
I’ve had a busy day. Got up late (no change there then) had a Sainsbugs delivery, emptied the outside cupboard, re arranged all the kitchen cupboards. Took the rubbish out (3 trips, lots of cardboard for the recycling bin) and finally a trip to the chemist for our prescriptions and.........a walk. Our first walk since before Christmas. I am pleased to say DH did very well and his back seemed to hold up. We didn’t walk too far but did about a mile and then came home. Such a joy to be outside.
Kaimoana I’m sorry your group couldn’t be at the bedside for your friend. I hope their prayers went ahead anyway even if only privately.
I am so sorry that you have lost so much pleasure in your life through your lack of sight. Your difficulty reading reminds me a bit of what my son and DGS go through with dyslexia. My son says that when reading to the end of a line his eyes cannot find the beginning of the next line. That words blur and move across the page. Whole sections of text go missing as his eyes pass over them. My DGS is worse. He cannot read anything that is not on a coloured background without holding the page against his nose. Fortunately for him coloured lenses in his glasses make a difference but that was not discovered until he was a teenager. So many years of being unable to read like others. It saddens me greatly that books hold no interest for my DGS. Words don’t flow for him so the story doesn’t unfold. Eyesight is such a precious gift. I can understand how losing your sight over a period of time brings you such sadness. I am glad you have a couple of students, I’m sure they will benefit greatly from you knowledge and help.
Oh dear, a Big Bang. What has occurred? I hope you are still online ?
grammaretto one of my well travelled neighbours once described our lounge as minimalist. She thought I would find hers cluttered. I pointed out that I found hers fascinating and that mine was only minimalist because we hadn’t been travelling anywhere to buy things. Move on some years and I am now awash with trolls from Norway, glass from Finland, pottery from Algiers, Russian dolls from Russia, a plaque from Murmansk and other assorted bits and pieces. Tidy it isn’t but lots of bits to remind us of places and lots of family photos.
Two of my favourite TV shows. Location, Location and Escape to the Country. I love them. I also like the Sewing Bee in the same way you probably like the pottery throw down. Perhaps you should apply to go on the show, ?
Mamissimo I did wonder for a minute where the conversation was going when you said MrM did the business last night ...... I wasn’t contemplating rats at the time. Oh dear. Dare I ask did he catch it? In my mind I can hear that music that always used to accompany a police chase of burglars in the old black and white films.....picturing MrM dashing to and fro trusty dog at his heels ?
Ah, more vegetables. What are we having a glut of this year. Passionate parsnips, sultry swedes, troublesome turnips. I can’t wait. ?
Jan you are so right. Depression hovers on the horizon for so many. We are missing so much of life at the moment. It’s over a year since our sons have been inside our house. I miss our sitting down and eating together and our chats, I hope that by summer we can be together again. Even if not hugging at least sitting and talking together.
I hope the news for your DH is good and what you want.
cherry, dragonfly, panache, nfk, missedout hope you are all ok. Even if some of you are unable to post I hope you know you are in our thoughts. You too Nortsat
Take care all.

Mammissimo. That’s an amazing and so true post. As you say think so many of us have mild depression and some of us are hit badly by feeling so isolated and alone. I know I am which is really stupid as I have DH here but I so miss my daughters and coffees with friends etc. And although the jabs are going so well there seems to be the underlying fear that Covid will never go away. I’m very lucky that I have an amazing GP who is so understanding but I don’t like to bother him very often.
Kaimoana didn’t realise you have AMD. That’s a horrible disease. We once met someone on holiday who had that. We were waiting at Venice to fly home and he went to the loo and coming back he walked straight passed us. Had to rush after him.
We have a cleaner except that we don’t at the moment as she has children that are not a school. Love coming back to a sparkling clean house! And it always smells so gorgeous. She brings her hoover and all her own cleaning materials. Just hope she’ll be able to come back soon. I’m such a lazy b....r!
Waiting to hear from hospital if DH can have radiotherapy or not. Supposed to ring this afternoon but I’m not holding my breath!
Hope everyone is ok. At least the snow has gone from here and it’s much milder

Good morning gang.....
Mr M did the business last night and charged around the house doing thwack the rat.....everywhere he went H beagle was on his heels and she sometimes led by a nose....Fergal cat retired to his favourite radiator and watched the chaos with one eye. I think I saw him smile........

Today will be peacefully spent mapping out a timetable for the spring sowings of beans vegetables because the weather next week looks great for further compost spreading activity. Yippee ?

Hello again Lobstars,

You have put it so well Mamissimo and I hope that you are right and our missing gang members are on Standby and getting through it as best they can. It is Up hill,

A lot milder today as the snow has almost all gone.

Doodle you are most industrious. I can imagine your house is a little untidy but creative and interesting. I like watching to enjoying TV programmes such as Location Location and Escape to the Country although I have never got in to the decorating ones. I enjoyed the Pottery Throwdown last night although I was longing to butt in with the reason all their pots cracked.

Did the power go bang? Kaimoana? It must be hard not being able to see clearly but you seem to manage better than many who can! I hope the new student proves to be as satisfying to teach as your last one.

As for pure wool: I wear a merino sweater, (machine made) over a t shirt which I have hardly taken off all winter. Wool next to the skin can be itchy and hot but there is nothing nicer to knit with and it feeds your hands with lanolin.

Letters to write. Clutter to clear. Mojo to find.......

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Mamissimo You've summed it up perfectly, it's a tragic state of affairs - all over the world.

I hope Spring really does bring a bounce back but if the UK experience is anything like ours in NZ, there's no guarantee.

What's happening to the UK now, was our lot early last year for months and we are far from free to do and go where we wish even now. Thousands of families are separated.

Just today, a group was due to go say prayers at the hospital bedside of an old and much-loved friend who may not last the week. It's all cancelled and it's heart-breaking.

This is how it was in the war: we don't like it and there's no apparent end to it but we just have to make the best of what life we still have and look to ♩ ♬ "tomorrow, when the world is free".♪ ♫
What's the alternative?

Maybe it's easier for me because I've been locked down for 10 years now and will be for the rest of my life with no hope of any reprieve.

No vaccine is going to restore my ability to paint, draw, read, drive to visit family, museums, festivals, concerts, movies or galleries; go camping or on holiday.

Even eating out, apart from simple things like scones, is out because I no longer have the ability to see the food on my plate and manage it politely in public.

I have taken on 2 students to prevent my feelings of utter uselessness to the world.
The necessary research will be fun but unbelievably difficult when every line of text moves, is blurred and part of each letter is missing but I'll be damned if I'll give up until my sight goes completely.

From an AMD site, here are some picture which show what I see (or don't! ) not everyone with AMD is like this of course, but after a decade, I am.

Mamissimo You made me laugh with "cultural misappropriation", when I go to the mosque I wear hijab (which this is not btw) as that's respectful.

Maybe everyone should stop eating Yorkshire Pudding and Bakewell Tart or marching down the aisle to Mendelssohn (unless they're German!).

However, if you're going to debase or denigrate a cultural symbol, then I agree, it's wrong. I shan't be doing that.

There has just been a huge BANG! and a flickering of lights, so I suspect the newly installed transformer from Powerless Saturday, has just blown. Ooops

Kaimoana I think the same could be achieved with a balaclava ?
I’m pleased you have another student even if you need to buy in more food. I’m sure she will benefit from your help.
I too am a little worried about our missing gangsters.
I hope they are all ok.
Mamissimo I think you have summed up things completely.
This latest lockdown in the winter is harder to cope with I think. It seems to be going on for so long.
I too feel on standby. Waiting for something to give me the impetus to get going with something.
Did you say rat!! ?. I am up on the table. Let me know when it’s safe to come down.
Missedout it’s past my bedtime too. Take care dear lobstars and sleep well. Thinking of you all ?

Mamissimo, I just had to pop my head round the door to compliment you on your beautifully written post. Let's hope we all remember how to dance.

I'm too tired tonight to stay and contribute, besides, I can smell a rat!

I'll be back tomorrow.

I hope the Lobstars look after themselves and sleep peacefully.

Kaimoana wearing your modesty bonnet looks as if it could be cultural misappropriation......but it might just do the trick for you. I love the way we borrow good ideas from other cultures and use them for new purposes. It has always been thus.

I do think many in the uk have low grade depression....and that's not to denigrate it at all. I can only speak for myself but I can manage my health stoically when life provides me with social interaction, diversions and amusement and this third lockdown is proving challenging.

We rallied to the call a year ago, determined to save the NHS, ourselves and everyone else.....as shielded people we stayed locked down longer....we sniffed a sort of freedom briefly in the summer but we didn't trust it....and then had November lockdown, then tier 4....then further lockdown. We've lost family, seen our children struggle and haven't been able to contribute practical help. It's now late winter, it's been below freezing for a week and our mojo has gone into hibernation. Our isolation has been long and monotonous.

We're baking, reading, painting and just ticking over on standby for spring and some freedom, family and friends.
Us stoics just go a little quiet when everything is so dull and grey but when the sun comes and the restrictions go I just hope my knees will remember how to dance.

Got to run.....Fergal has come in with a rat!!!!!!!!

Mamissimo You've inspired me to make flapjacks - the Yorkshire version. They used to be a huge favourite in our house as the boys were growing up. Staples for the school lunch box.

I can imagine you and MrM dancing round your now-free hall, in a joyful celebration of the space.

Doodle Level 3 is "confined to barracks" but as I said to a friend this morning, it removes responsibility for other things, so I can put time into the stuff I enjoy.

As I've just acquired another student, that'll be lots of lovely English prep.
She's 15 and her parents are worried as she's behind standard. My reputation for amending this, has gone before me, no doubt strewing rose petals as it did so.

Like all my students, she'll have tea here before the lesson begins, so as most teenagers live on foods I wouldn't touch with a bargepole don't buy, some revision of the shopping list has to be done.

Raining and dull today (the garden LOVES that) thanks to La Nina. It'll pass - I hope.

It's remarkable how often I read things here which have also come up in my own life. My ddil asked for 100% wool hats for Gubbins, which I've made and passed on yesterday.

But supposing Gubbins is like her Grandma and can't wear wool or acrylic hats, both of which itch me?

I also have a vulnerable neck (back off Dracula!) and the slightest breeze, from a car window for instance, means stiff soreness the day after.
So I'm experimenting this year, having seen something which may serve.

It's called a 'modesty bonnet' and whilst it may look weird - not an unusual situation for my clothing - it will only be worn in the coldest weather and perhaps indoors.
As I say, an experiment.

I'm getting a little worried about so many missing Gangstars; ennui, depression, lockdown blues, isn't affecting all of them, surely?

They all seem such a stoic, lively, determined and versatile bunch who'd make the best of such leisure time, enforced or not, so I fear it has to be illness

Ah well, no matter the reason, you are all in my thoughts and I'm wishing you strong and happy wherever possible.

I'm off to join the Dean and his cat in front of his amazing dancing fire.

Kaimoana that’s bad news. Hope you keep safe.
Grammaretto It’s nice to have video memories I think. is it sad for you to watch films with MrG in or does it just bring back happy memories?
I’m like your other DGC, I can’t tolerate wool. My skin is very sensitive (delicate little flower that I am) . I’m sure your DGD will love her hand made cardi.

Today has been painting by numbers day. I worked on it in three sessions allowing drying time between each session. It is coming on but there is so much still to do.
I have never had a cleaner. My house has always been too untidy. Not dirty, because I do clean it but messy because I don’t put things away and because DH collects bits of paper and leaves them all in special places so he knows where they are........until he comes to look for them and can’t find them. ?
I too am eating for lent. Getting rid of temptation by eating it now ? I am indulging in a glass of wine too, cheers.
Mamissimo that’s good news about your son. He must be relieved. I bet you will be pleased to have some space back too. I have loads of things we need to take to the recycling depot. Going to wait till we’ve had our second jabs but I might need to hire a van to take it all there by then ?
Your DHs bread sounds lovely. I could just eat a slice of warm bread and butter. How far away are you ? ?
I too hope the missing gangsters are safe and well.
Take care all.

That's such good news Mamissimo. The best things are worth waiting for

How far away from you is DS moving?
Does your cleaner use your hoover or bring her own?
I just ask because I am nosey my DM used a cleaning company consisting of 2 men who came and blitzed everything once a fortnight and brought all their own equipment. She liked it because they were fast and efficient.
I only once employed a cleaner apart from having a Home Help when having a home birth. My cleaner was wonderful and meant I had one room and bathroom and kitchen properly lovely for at least one day when the DC were small and I could pretend I lived like that all the time.
My job was to pick flowers and arrange them in vases and invite people round to admire my clean house. It was more than worth the money for my mental health alone.
I now employ a young gardener but she is unable to work in this weather so I shall have to hope she can do extra time when it improves.

The sourdough bread sounds delicious too. I am eating plenty just now in preparation for Lent. I was eating sliced supermarket bread but realised I could buy artisan sourdough loaves and slice them myself and freeze any leftover as if there would be for later. Soo much nicer and better for the health.

I am having a glass of red in honour of St Valentine so here's to all of us. I'm not tipsy at all Sending love to you Lobstars . Cheers!

Grammaretto I have decided to hoover get some exercise today ? ....and to make flapjack.

DS has finally exchanged contracts on his house purchase and completes next Friday. He will move out on the 27th...and so far has packed exactly zilch. However the bed he bought has now been joined by a settee and a complete kitchen inventory. DD2 is dropping off a dining table and six chairs ? later so I think the hall and study are now officially full!

Now that we are 2 weeks post vaccination we are going to have our lovely cleaner back at work......but as she won't be able to move in this repository we may wait until the boy has done his flit. Wed better book a slot at the recycling centre too for all the rubbish he will leave behind.

We've mastered sourdough and Mr M is churning out wonderful loaves.....trouble is we are eating them. I think he's building his reserves in preparation for the milk diet.

Hope the missing are safe under their duvets.....

Oh no Kaimoana Hell's Bells!
I hadn't heard. I hope it won't make much difference to you but it is a setback and a worry.

I watched my DS3's wedding on my laptop and also a very informal film of DM's 90th birthday celebrations the same year, June 2005. It was a Heatwave. Remember those?

Back to real life.... sigh!
I slept very well, thankyou Doodle
The cardigan I still haven't finished, is for a 3 yr old DGC. She's the only one of my 7 DGC who doesn't mind "itchy" wool. It isn't itchy wool at all but supersoft washable wool, but I am a stickler for real wool and dislike acrylic.
I try to time my studio sessions to fit when the indoor electric kiln is on but there is no way I can pipe heat from the gas kiln unfortunately. I wish it was better insulated and faster.
That's me then. What are you getting up to today?

Crivvens, Auckland's back to Level 3

Nfk who would have thought a year ago that the highlight of the month would be food deliveries. ?
dragonfly that’s so kind of you to pop in to reassure us that you are ok, even if not all is well in your world at the moment.
I hope that your problems resolve themselves. I think we all have some anxieties lurking in the background. I hope we get a lifting of lockdown soon so that some problems will resolve themselves.
Grammaretto such lovely pictures. I would love to tramp through some deep snow and feel the chill and experience the quiet that only snow brings. I appreciate you’ve probably had enough of it by now but the scenery is lovely.
Who are you knitting the cardigan for? Is it one of your DGC?
Tonight we had our pudding course from last night’s meal. It was chocolate fondant and cream. Lovely rich and light. Very tasty. I am building up to lent (or should that be running down to lent) when I will be giving up some treats. My last weekend of goodies.
Jan sorry to hear about your friend and her family troubles, as you say, little we can do to help others at the moment although sometimes just being there to talk to is a help.
I have started watching The Bridge on the BBC iPlayer again. I watched it first time round and enjoyed it but I can’t remember what it’s about so thought I would give it another go. It’s easier to watch on an iPad as I can read the subtitles better.
Kaimoana I think the problem with your name is that Kia is an orange juice we used to have here and it flows off the tongue easier than Kai, but I’ve got it now. ?
My old food chopper gave up on Friday. I use it for chopping nuts for DHs breakfast among other things so needed a new one. DH suggested one with a more powerful motor. It arrived today. It is huge. Much bigger than the old one but will also make pastry, cakes and whip cream. Do you think it’s part of DHs cunning plan to get me to make him more scones and cakes ?
Happy birthday to your son. Hope he has a nice time today.
Take care all the gangsters. Sleep well.

Jan Please stop worrying about spelling my name, it really doesn't matter one jot.
Shocking news about all those people catching Covid in hospital. Although it's not quite the same, many people go into managed isolation here having tested negative on arrival at the border, then test positive a few days later

Of course they either stay where they are, if not ill (nurses and doctors on duty) or move to hospital which means total isolation from everyone again. This is a wicked virus.

We are to begin vaccinating soon: the staff at the borders first.
I'm going to ask my doctor's advice when I see her on 22nd. I may decline it when it goes public. We'll see.

Doodle I'm so glad your DH enjoys FutureLearn too, it really is a wonderful idea, this MOOC .

It's my darling son's birthday today and I know my dil has planned lots of special things for him, including a fancy cake.
14th February always makes me reminisce about his birth and what wonderfully happy times we've had with both my sons. I truly am a lucky, lucky woman.

Grammaretto is there any way of piping the heat from the kiln (when it's lit) into your house?

Kippers all the way from Aberdeen for my breakfast: "wild caught in the North Sea".
Yummy.

I wonder if the people who catch and pack them, know a person in far-away Aotearoa is blessing them for their efforts ?

Take care everyone, lockdown may be necesary and boring but it's a time of renewal, safety and rest - if you can let it be so.

Gosh Missedout I felt tired just reading about all the work you had been doing! Great to hear you are feeling better. Don’t wear yourself out again though!
Nfk We only have Tesco or Sainsburys deliveries on our calendar too and of course DH hospital/Drs appointments.! Would love to be able to add a hairdressers appt and be able to see my daughter in Nottingham or indeed my other daughter in the next village.
Dragonfly.So sorry you not been feeling too good. Hope the sun will soon be shinning for you again.
I have a friend who’s Dad was taken into hospital with dangerously low blood pressure. He now has Covid although has no symptoms. My friend also has been tested positive and is really feeling dreadful with a continuous cough. Then her husband has also been tested positive but has no symptoms! To top it all her 87 year old mom fell this morning and has been admitted to hospital with a suspected broken hip. I feel so sorry for my friend but really there is nothing I can do.
Kaimoana wrong spelling again! Problem with DH op is that last time he ended up with pneumonia and blood clots on his lungs which is why the surgeon is reluctant to operate. The cancer is not one that will spread so we are going to see if radiotherapy will help.
Somehow we seem to have football on tv AGAIN. It was cricket all morning - I’m such a good wife. Ha ha!
Grammaretto Impressed by your walk. Have to confess I have hardly put my nose out of the door these last few days. It’s so flipping cold and the snow still hasn’t gone.
Hope everyone has a reasonable weekend - no difference between weekends and weekdays now unless you’re still working of course!

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Oh dear so sorry you are feeling so low Dragonfly . I hope it's temporary.
My kiln is in what used to be the coal store so outdoors in a damp shed. There is some heating in the studio but it doesn't get warm.
However after my icy walk i am now far too hot to think of lighting a fire.
I'm afraid Doodle my knitting is still the child's cardigan. The new wool hasn't arrived yet though it's supposed to be on its way.
I have had 5 identical emails from Hermes saying they will deliver between 1 and 3. They haven't.
Here are pictures from my walk to make you feel glad to be indoors Nfk

Hallo you lovely people, just popped in to say I am feeling really low at the moment with problems weighing down from all directions. Hopefully things will start to look up soon.
I just didn’t want you to worry.
Sending love and best wishes to you all.

So pleased to hear you're back to firing on all cylinders Missedout, you're sounding quite positive.

There's a stiff breeze outside and it's still below freezing, and, although the roads have freeze dried, the paths are treacherous. I do have strap on crampon things so I can walk ok, but when there's a cold wind I can't see where I'm going anyway so it's not a pleasure.

Today I've made bread and listened to DGD2 read AND the second excitement this month - we have a Tesco delivery this evening. Our February calendar is completely blank except for two Tesco deliveries.

Mamissimo, you summed it up perfectly. On Standby mode.