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anxiety by one member of the family

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Kali2 Sat 17-Apr-21 15:01:13

Hello- there has been a lot of discussion recently about some people being particularly anxious about Covid- and cutting them off from family and friends.

This seems to have got worse now as restrictions are now less stringent. That is hard for individuals- but what can be done when one member of the family is so anxious, that they are controlling whole families and preventing get-together?

Our DIL has not been out or met anyone since last March. Our son wanted to visit his brother recently, quite legally according to new rules, as he has been through a very difficult time and he wanted to go and see him to support him. DIL said that if he wanted to go and see his brother, he would not be welcome back home and would have to find somewhere to isolate from her and children afterwards for 10 days.

We are not allowed to visit either, and she won't let son and children come to see us either. This is very hard- and feels like cohersive control. We do normally get on very well with her- and have had many happy times and holidays together in the past. What can we do? (and I suppose the answer is 'nothing').

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Kali2 Thu 08-Jul-21 19:28:51

they will do PCR test with next day result on Sunday, for early release- so let's hope we will be able to hug and have a few days together. But honestly, when we found out this morning I burst into tears and I swore x a lot!

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Kali2 Fri 16-Jul-21 22:42:31

We got call early on Friday to say classmate had same day PCR test and negative! Pheew, what a rollercoaster.

DIL was instrumental in organising a massive surprise at another relative's garden, and everyone worked so hard to totally and absolutely fool us and keep everything quite. We were just told we were going on a picnic ... Only 10 of us, but it was magnificent and just what we had dreamed off. Wonderful- and good on DIL for helping to make that happen. We had a lovely week with them actually, as she was reassured that all measures were taken and weather was good. We had PCR test before going to stay, just to put her at ease.

We picked the right time, as the lifting of all restrictions is making stress levels rise again, understandably- so we may not be able to meet for a while. Will offer to do PCR test every time before we meet.

Truly grateful and happy.

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Summerlove Sun 18-Jul-21 17:10:04

Iā€™m truly so happy for you. I know it was very difficult for you to wait out her anxieties, but I am so glad that you did and your relationship was undamaged.

Her planning a surprise for you truly shows that this was nothing personal towards you.

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Kali2 Sun 18-Jul-21 17:32:38

Yes. Thanks.

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