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Do you have friends who have declined to be vaccinated.........h ow do you deal with this (stay polite!)

(258 Posts)
Luckygirl Wed 09-Jun-21 08:30:56

I have at least 2 and I struggle to find something to say to them when they bring it up. Neither are conspiracy theorists; neither have medical conditions that might influence their decision. Both are pleasant people.

I have to confess that it gets under my skin a bit. The more people who get vaccinated, the slower the spread and the nearer we get to managing this pandemic. We do not get vaccinated just for ourselves, but also for everyone else. These people are piggybacking on our taking the vanishingly small risk of being vaccinated.

Can they not see what is happening to the poor souls in India?

Does anyone else have such friends? Do you challenge their decision?

haddersmum Thu 10-Jun-21 21:18:05

When we faced a war and people had to fight an enemy which threatened our country, they did not have a choice not to fight because of the personal threat to their lives. I see this as a similar thing, we are just fighting a different kind of enemy and need to have our vaccinations for the good of the whole even if it means a sacrifice to ourselves. My view anyway.

Kryptonite Thu 10-Jun-21 21:24:16

I meant to type 61 deaths (not 71). I see 5 more have died after AZ since the figures were updated.

varian Thu 10-Jun-21 21:28:45

Do they know whether these people who died might have contracted covid before they were vaccinated or might have had some terminal disease or might have been run over by a bus?

Lucca Thu 10-Jun-21 21:32:00


^Anyone who lets something like a vaccine come between them aren't friends.^

Similarly, anyone who doesn't care enough about their friends to want to protect them by getting vaccinated, isn't really a friend either.

I’m with you on that one !

Kryptonite Thu 10-Jun-21 21:51:45

variant - they seem to have been fit and healthy people with no underlying health conditions. Some are now being identified in the press including 44 year old Radio Newcastle presenter Lisa Shaw. People have died in other countries too after AZ. This is of course, the reason why under 40s are advised to have Pfizer in the UK and why so many countries have restricted (or abandoned) the use of AZ. I know I'm not the only person who's scared of this vaccine.

Kryptonite Thu 10-Jun-21 21:55:03

MaggsMcG - my sincere condolences to you. 💐

Kryptonite Thu 10-Jun-21 22:10:10

variant - to be clear these people have all died from rare blood clots linked to AZ, not other causes like the ones you mention.

Dustyhen2010 Thu 10-Jun-21 22:31:11


variant - to be clear these people have all died from rare blood clots linked to AZ, not other causes like the ones you mention.

While we know there is a rare, very rare chance of getting a blood clot from the AZ vaccine I believe over 127,000 people have lost their lives from this disease in the UK and I think that gives the answer as to why when offered the vaccine it should be taken. All those lives lost plus there are many whose lives have been altered by long covid. I am thinking of those like Kate Garraway's husband.

Chewbacca Thu 10-Jun-21 23:31:25

This says it all

GrauntyHelen Thu 10-Jun-21 23:53:17

I don't have stupid or selfish friends so all my friends are vaccinated

Yorki Fri 11-Jun-21 00:10:06

Anna-7 I'm with you on that one too. Its just going to stay around for longer, I was poorly with my vaccines but I'd rather be poorly than die, I know / knew someone who was anti vaccine, she caught covid and died. It's hard to feel sorry for people like that, I felt sorry for whoever she was in contact with. Don't our nurses have a hard enough time, without these people playing God ??

antheacarol55 Fri 11-Jun-21 08:09:05

My son can’t have it for health reasons.
I would respect your friends opinions and choices who knows they could be proved right not to have further down the line.
I have had both of mine ,and I was ill for 2 weeks after the first dose so was dreading the second ,which was fine didn’t get any side effects .
My son almost died from flu vaccine in 2009.
It left him with long term disabilities
He had for years before then without issue ,now he can’t have it

Speldnan Fri 11-Jun-21 09:44:19

No, everyone I know has had it even my DD who wasn’t keen and had bad side effects but she knew it was her duty to have it for the sake of everyone. The majority of people in hospital now are unvaccinated so I find it incredible that some people are more worried about the vaccine than they are about Covid! It’s illogical.

Speldnan Fri 11-Jun-21 10:13:18

What kind I’d world do anti vaxxers think we’d be living in now without it? Certainly in the U.K. we’d be in a cycle of lockdowns and surges. No doubt those people who have declined the vaccine without good cause are still enjoying our present freedoms, gained because the majority of us have had the scientific miracle that is the vaccine for this horrible disease.

BlueSky Fri 11-Jun-21 10:16:36

I’ve now had both doses of vaccine. It was the AZ which was always my first choice as being a viral vector, I believed ‘safer’ as already used in other vaccinations. Tragically people have died in the UK and abroad because of the vaccine. I understand that given my age, the risk of catching Covid and dying of it, is much higher, but still I’ve been uneasy in the weeks after the jab.

Biscuitmuncher Fri 11-Jun-21 12:10:29

I think with most people who are choosing not to have the covid vaccine are not anti vaxxers but anti this vaccine

FarNorth Fri 11-Jun-21 12:20:42

antheacarol that's so awful for your son and you.

Brigidsdaughter Fri 11-Jun-21 20:56:26

I know of one person in a wider group of friends who has decided not to have it. It's possible she has changed her mind but I doubt it. She maintains it changes one's DNA.
She talks about 'Big Pharma' a lot and her alternative treatments. It didn't stop her going into hospital twice with severe breathing problems and taking all the meds then. Nor having an epidural.
I have little time for anyone not taking it - unless there are serious medical reasons. I felt very rough for a few days after my first dose of AZ but was excited to have had it.

leeds22 Fri 11-Jun-21 21:15:48

I had some tests in hospital recently. Most of the nurses were just back from the covid wards, either ICUs or palliative wards. They had no patience with anti-vaxers. Fortunately everyone I know couldn’t wait for the jab.

CafeAuLait Fri 11-Jun-21 22:36:46


I think with most people who are choosing not to have the covid vaccine are not anti vaxxers but anti this vaccine

I don't even think most are anti this vaccine, just unsure about it. Though I know from social media reading some are anti. I've talked to two friends about it this week. Both are not anti but are unsure about it. There seems to be a significant hesitancy group. I'm not sure how big the group is that is actually anti it.

KathrynP Sat 12-Jun-21 02:35:13

If it wasn’t for the vaccine we would still be in total lockdown for the foreseeable future. A ‘friend’ of mine won’t have the vaccine as “it changes your genes and makes you more vulnerable to other viruses we haven’t got a cure for.”

FunOma Sat 12-Jun-21 06:55:56

Biscuitmuncher, I am with you on this matter. Too many unknowns about long term effects. This is an experimental therapy and plenty of experts have weighed in on the possible risks, except, their voices are squashed in main stream media. I am so glad to have heard many of them and feel good about not jumping on the bandwagon that so may, including all my relatives in The Netherlands, have. You can say it is their choice, but I fear it is not a well informed one. The main stream media globally is not sharing the truth about some very serious side effects or long-term health risks. It is also atrocious that people are even thinking about vaccinating children!! They have decades of living ahead of them and it would be horrible if they get serious health issues from the vaccination to deal with for their entire life!
Find interviews with Dr. Sucharit Bhakdi on Youtube to feel confident about your resolve not to be vaccinated.

FunOma Sat 12-Jun-21 07:03:41

Regarding this issue that has divided so many people, families even, I believe it is in everyone's best interest to follow the advice: "Don't ask, and don't tell"

Just be happy with whatever your choice is in the matter and do not hold grudges against those who decided different from you. Keep your immune system healthy with compassion for others instead of contempt.

BlueSky Sat 12-Jun-21 08:31:24

I have fb friends in Italy and tragically in the last few weeks at least 3 young women have died following vaccinations with the AZ. This is despite the AZ being recommended for the over 60 only, but these women received it voluntarily at an open day when left over vaccine was used. Sadly the confidence in the AZ abroad has reached rock bottom.

Shropshirelass Sat 12-Jun-21 09:05:07

There are a lot of myths circulating regarding vaccinations. We have both had our full doses without any side effects. Some people are a little unwell afterwards, but they are the minority (I have friends who had some side effects but are glad they have been vaccinated). Vaccinating is the only way to get rid of this virus, it will take years but we need to start and hit it hard. All vaccinations carry a risk but the benefits outweigh these, so go for it and protect yourselves and your loved ones.