How do I deal with a friend who won’t take lateral flow test before we meet

Marydoll
Yes, that’s what good friends do!

I am meeting my ex colleagues tomorrow for lunch, after not seeing them for two years, because I am CEV.
They are all going to do LFTs before meeting me.
They are indeed good friends.

tanith

Sorry but if she won’t take your vulnerability seriously I wouldn’t be meeting her.

Agreed

This friend of yours knows you are clinically extremely vulnerable and yet refuses to do a lateral flow test ! Hmmmmm.

If i were in that situation, i would most certainly not be making plans to meet up. Of course we can't know that every single person we come into contact with has taken a LFT but in this instance, when you have asked and she has refused, i do not call that a friend and i would not be meeting up with her, simple as.

HettyBetty

I wouldn't be worried if I wasn't CEV. Surely a little bit of respect for those of us who are would go a long way. Nobody wants to drag the pandemic out, just take appropriate precautions for the particular circumstances.

this is how I feel. I go to work and train without testing (unless I feel unwell) but I feel it's responsible to test before meeting someone who is CEV - for example

Surely it’s something to agree about in general conversation. It doesn’t mean falling out.

Chardy
With respect, I think there’s an enormous amount of sympathy on this site but the OPS request is illogical as they will be going out to eat.

There's not a lot of empathy on this site sometimes. I find that very sad.

If that's what takes for you to end a friendship then your freindships surely are not real freindships. I find that quite sad. Genuinely.

It's irrelevant if your eating un masked in a cafe . The fact is your out with your freind and you've asked her to do a test. She is refusing. If it was me I wouldn't be meeting said freind. It's the principle and the lack of respect from your so called freind that is the most concerning from me. You do what's right for you ! Be honest and tell her why you won't be meeting her. Do let us know how you get on.

Just don`t meet her and tell her why - better a bit of blunt conversation than ending up seriously ill or worse.

I wouldn't be worried if I wasn't CEV. Surely a little bit of respect for those of us who are would go a long way. Nobody wants to drag the pandemic out, just take appropriate precautions for the particular circumstances.

I wouldn’t dream of asking a friend or family member to take a test before I met with them.

Nor would I, but then I don't have any health issues. If I was CEV I may be thinking differently. It's obvious that this can't go on forever, but at the moment with Omicron doing the rounds I don't think it's particularly paranoid for someone who has major health concerns. Personally I would just arrange to meet outside somewhere nice for a coffee - although the weather could cause a rethink. Is there a nice park with a bandstand nearby? Or a cafe with outdoor tables?

‘For most of us’, there’s the clue.

I totally agree with Franbern. I wouldn’t dream of asking a friend or family member to take a test before I met with them. The tests are not particularly accurate and surely we can’t expect everyone who we come into contact with to have tested every day.
Do you expect every retail worker of every shop you go into or fellow travellers on public transport to have tested prior to boarding the bus or train? It’s just not reasonable.
Any friend who asked me to do this wouldn’t be a friend for much longer. I’m completely happy to see, entertain and hug my friends and family whether they have been vaccinated or not. We can not live with this fear of catching something which for most of us will be no worse than a cold.

I don’t think it’s too much to ask someone to test before meeting especially inside. Only takes a few minutes fir peace of mind,
especially if you are vulnerable,
Have you asked her!

I assume that you have had all your vaccinations.
Have you, in the past, asked people to have blood tests, et to see if they may be harbouring, flue, etc germs before you met??

How long are you going to go on like this. This year,? next year? rest of your life? - this particular virus is going to be around for a very long time.

Obviously, if this is the way you wish to exist, that is up to you. But my sympathies are with your friend, imagine she may not wish to be for much longer.

Anyway, I understand that LFT's are pretty inaccurate unless the person taking it has symptoms.

My step daughter refused to do a test as she doesn’t believe in them, so she hasnt seen her elderly father for two years. Sad .It’s not much to ask !

Our daughter is CEV and we wouldn't dream of meeting her without doing a test, She hadn't been to any indoor venues since the start of the pandemic.

Just say politely and with a smile 'do you mind taking a LFT before we meet' and see what happens.

How do you know she doesn't? If you are sure then don't meet her - or if she doesn't know how to you could explain how to do it. It's not hard now with the nasal swabs.
There is going to come a day when we stop doing them though but maybe not yet.

Sorry loveOc crossed post.

I agree with grandtante's advice. It's better to be honest about this now, rather than making excuses every time she wants to meet up.

As Omicron is so transmissible it would be possible to be infected inside a cafe or restaurant. If anyone in there has covid there is a risk to you.
Even if your friend tested negative you are not safe from others. They won't all have done a test.

Judy ' I just don’t feel happy sitting at a small table inside for several hours.' Do you mean in a cafe? If so I am sure other people in there will not have tested, so her testing is irrelevant. If in your home than I quite understand. As you are very vulnerable I would think outside is best for you anyway.