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🦞Lockdown friends still together🦞

(1001 Posts)
Doodle Wed 27-Nov-24 19:25:41

It began as group support during difficult times and although Covid has faded a little, the friendship has endured and become stronger.

Still here for anyone to join a non-judgemental, caring thread during the often challenging time in life.

We don't have all the answers but in the spirit of Doodle and Cherry who began it all, and with a happy lobster as our mascot, we do offer friendship and often a bit of very cheeky chat.

Grammaretto Sun 12-Jan-25 22:20:10

Your DS is doing well NotSpag. That's what matters most of all.

I'm coming with you to the beach!
I don't know where you saw 18° for Scotland Nfk but it wasn't here.
DD sent a photo of her dog. Can you see her? She's not on thr frozen loch.
DS brought his dog here today.
I can see how a dog would be good company, someone to make you get up each day.

I just have deer here. Can you spot them?

NotSpaghetti Mon 13-Jan-25 10:32:47

I read minus 18° for some area of Scotland!
It's above freezing here today so that's good

Naughtyneine Mon 13-Jan-25 11:12:55

Well that's 2 weeks flown by....I on the other hand have not flown anywhere...or even walked at speed. Whatever this lurgy has been has left me tired or am I just lazy. ( Don't feel you have to answer that).

Cherry.. It took me a while to realise that you and Grammaretto are in the same stage (ish) of hip op recovery. We only moved into the cottage 13 days before my op and the stairs are steep and have bends. I found using my crutches more dangerous so stopped and used the walls and gritted teeth to get up and down. DH had to go back to work after 2 days so come day 5 post op I was on my own. I remember hanging out the first wash in the garden....it took me 30 minutes and was followed by an hour's sleep.
Well done to both of you for doing so well. Not an easy time of year for a serious op.

Notspag....are you sure that's a shed... I've seen similar things on Airbnb.... Described in such terms as..dainty little home from home...perfect little get away etc etc. 🤣
I like the idea of the lemony/ lime colour...
Fabulous news that your son is home and he's got both his loving Mum and wife looking after his best interests. I was always mindful too that I was the MIL and mine was a supporting role which I did with love and unsparingly. I hope they all think of that sometimes.

Nfk.... We haven't been out in Henrietta Moho this year...the plans to go to Wales for New Year because of the lurgy and the weather.
A walk on the beach always does it for me..either lifts my spirits or I just let the tears flow and let the wind dry them. Sometimes both on the same walk. Life is like that isn't it?

Kaimoana... How lovely that you friend felt so at ease to test at yours...I hope though that you don't pick it up. It sounds like you have enough to put up with just now. I was thinking ...would one of those mobile TENS machines help you. I think you can get them on line or in the pharmacists and when I got mine it wasn't very expensive.

I can't comment on vomiting as I can't do it. Some sort of reflex is missing it seems. I'd have given anything to puke when I was pregnant but even shoving my whole hand down my throat produced nothing. My DH on the other hand can vomit to order if required ( it's not).
Grandmafrench... I've climbed to the top of Mont St Michel and stomped down again because they wanted to charge me to go into the abbey at the top. It is beautiful though and I'm sure Gubbins would have loved it.

Well it appears that we have booked the wedding proper (Civil Ceremony last year) and the church one is happening on June 28th so I had better get my butt in gear and get to the gym .... I'm at that... I'm going to look the very best and fit and lean and toned I can stage...it won't last lobsters.
Love to all.. especially those I haven't mentioned by name. You are all important. X

Doodle Mon 13-Jan-25 19:37:28

Grammaretto is that deer waiting for the rubbish collection 😊
* I love the picture of the snowy loch but I can’t see the dog anywhere. *
i went for a walk today on a route DH and I often walked. It wasn’t too cold and I spent all my time talking to him in my mind and out loud if no one else was around. Talked about all the things he would remember and the new stuff. I could imagine so clearly holding his hand in mine. It was a lovely walk and I enjoyed it. Peaceful and nice.
Im starting my sit fit class tomorrow and I’m so unfit I doubt I’ll be able to cope.
Naughtyneine nice to hear from you. You seem to have been quite poorly. Hope you’re feeling better now.
wow are you getting married. how lovely. Have you got an outfit lined up? Is it a local church? Must be an exciting time for you.
Must have an early night if I’m going to get fit tomorrow. I’m watching Playing Nice at the moment and trying not to binge on all the episodes. It’s like a book I can’t put down.

ixion Mon 13-Jan-25 20:12:32

No Doodle, I can't see the dog either🤦‍♀️. Help!!

A wedding, how marvellous! We have rejoiced with hatches, grieved with dispatches but, to my limited knowledge, I don't recall any Lobstar matches.
(I could be wrong - unlikely, my DC would maintain🤪).

I was wondering whether salmon outfits would be appropriate for us?
(You were planning on Lobstar (old) Maids of Honour?)
🤞

Kaimoana2 Mon 13-Jan-25 21:13:41

NN Congratulations! I hope the weather is good to you, so much nicer when the sun shines.
Actually, I have a TENS machine for many years; 2 rta necessitaing pain control. Good aren't they? smile

Doodle your walk with DH sounds just so peaceful and lovely. I'm sure you will be able to enjoy many more.

DS requested a video linkup this morning. They have decided to make their home there, probably North Yorkshire, which they both love.
ATM he has a job in London starting soon, so the rest of the family will come home without him and gradually wind up their lives here.

NotS Glad to hear your son is doing well. That must be a load off your mind smile

Yes ixion it was Molly Weir who played Aggie McDonald*.

I would love a Kira Nfk as I agree with everything you say. Dogs are wonderful companions.

And I include the barking dog across the way from me, he wouldn't bark if he wasn't lonely or anxious. Maybe I should dognap him? grin

CherryCezzy Mon 13-Jan-25 21:30:22

Dog, what dog? I can't see it either. It's a bit like searching one of those hidden object games. Are you sure you're not pulling our legs Grammaretto, or do we all need to go to Specsavers 🤣. I love the picture of the loch though.

Gosh, NotSpaghetti, what a worrying time you have been through. I'm pleased that your son is home, you can visit and everything is okay now x

Wow Naughtyneine, congratulations in advance. You say you had a civil ceremony last year, do you mean marriage or partnership may I ask. A summer 💒 wedding will be wonderful 😊.
You, too, have had a hip operation then? Your description of you navigating your winding staircase has made me instinctively cover my eyes 😬. I wouldn't want to walk up the stairs on crutches either though.

I'm sure you'll be fine at your sit fit exercise class Doodle. From what I know of these classes they start off quite gentle. You're probably fitter than you think anyway, as you do go on walks. Your walk today sounded wonderful 😊.

You don't mean dressed as salmon, do you ixion 🤣.

Grammaretto Mon 13-Jan-25 22:13:42

Doodle I'm glad you had your time with DH.
Naughtyneine a wedding! How wonderful ❤️
I hope we are invitedgrin

Ofcourse the dog is there.

I am tired this evening. My leg has swollen up again. I had a useful phonecall from the hospital nurse who seems to think my symptoms are normal 😕

I joined in at a rather emotional afternoon at history group listening and talking about our ancestors who had died in shipwrecks.

Everyone seems to have had or is about to have a new body part. It's like when you are pregnant and suddenly you see pregnant women everywhere.

Sleep well Lobstars

ixion Tue 14-Jan-25 16:16:24

🤔Couldn't see your dog, Grammaretto, for love nor readies - he must have surely had a good frolic! I am pleased you continue to make progress and that your advice received has given peace of mind. Were you happy with the results of your tree felling in absentia? All systems go for your building project this year?

To be honest, Kaimoana, I just don't know what to say about your DS's move. It is terribly painful, and I guess all we can do is to long-distance handhold and keep stressing that we are all here for you. 👂🦞👂🦞👂🦞👂 A cliché but true.😢

How did your 🪑 exercise class go, Doodle? Did you go by yourself? More importantly, will you go again?😉

If you are suffering the after-effects, you may be excused cheerleading duties this evening.

Although I had hoped you'd be there to help me with Cherry🍒 's walking frame through the turnstile. She had to do her very best last time after her crutches were deemed a Hazard to Security.

CherryCezzy Tue 14-Jan-25 19:25:26

ixion has said what everyone of us is thinking and feeling, Kaimoana. Part of me wants it to work out for your son in England and part of me wants him to return and be close to you in NZ. If your DS is working in London settling in Yorkshire (I note they are naturally drawn there, North rather than West though) won't be easy, especially at first, if that's what they intend, unless that is the ultimate aim rather than for the now. My heart goes out to you. I'm sending you my heartfelt cwtches X.

Doodle, I forgot to answer your questions yesterday. My neighbour has been back for months now, she was only away for just shy of 4 months. When she first got back she was fine but has been deteriorating slowly for a couple of months. This is a repeated pattern I'm afraid 😥. As for getting up and down the stairs, no I don't need a fireman's lift 🤣. I can walk up and down them just not in the normal manner. Instead of placing one foot on one step then the other on the next (alternative) step I have to put one foot on the step then the other foot on the same step. I have started to be able to walk up normally but it's far from easy but I definitely can't walk down normally. I had physio again today and no longer need the frame ker-ching 😁. I am now using one stick to get around the house but am to use, at least for the moment, two outdoors. The physio also added new exercises for me to do 😬.

Sorry to hear that your leg has swollen again, Grammaretto, I hope it's a bit better today 🤞. With me it's not my whole leg but my knee that keeps swelling up. I get shrugs from the physio who just says it's muscle strain and strengthening the muscles is the key. She's probably right but it's not easy to strengthen painful muscles 🤦‍♀️. Still ... I carry on with the exercises.
Thanks for circling where the dog is, I'd never have spotted it in a million years 🤭.

Full house at the stadium tonight, ixion. I wonder if security will let me take my stick in with me or confiscate it because I could try to use it to attack tonight's opponents it breaches health and safety 😉.

Kaimoana2 Tue 14-Jan-25 19:43:11

ixion and all my friends here

Yes, quite a blow, including for my DS who now faces the devastating prospect of parting from his darling girl in a few days without knowing when he’ll see her again.
But all this it to secure her future.

As you know, the exodus of people from NZ is unprecedented. People are leaving desperate families behind in the hope of finding work.
Rents have risen to an all-time high as has food.

Draconian rules and cuts are causing multiple social problems. Even elder pensions have suffered huge cuts and they were never exactly liberal to begin with.

Whatever the situation in the UK, it is far, far worse here.

So the fact that DS actually has a job and the right to work in England, is lucky indeed. Upset though I may be, it is worse for him but he know he has my full and unequivocal support.

I'm trying to be optimistic because what else can I do?

Thankyou, from the bottom of my heart for you supposrt

I have to tell you smile - years ago when I worked with Viet-namese refugees, one of the senior men wanted to make a speech of appreciation.

In his very dignified way he said, "I want to thank you from my bottom and my heart...."

And a lesson for me. They all went on to make a good future at a time when none of them thought they had a future.

♥♥♥♥

Grammaretto Tue 14-Jan-25 20:05:55

Be careful at the stadium tonight you footie fans you!

I'm not at Gaelic class. I started off today full of energy but have steadily flagged.
I went to the community store but wasn't allowed to carry my shopping home. People are being so thoughtful.

It was like a Spring day here. The snow has melted

Kaimoana I hope DS gets the UK out of his system PDQ, sees sense and comes home! But ofcourse it's not just him is it.

I am glad you can all see the wee doggie now. She is well camouflaged. She has a brown head and black and white body.

DB sent one from his neck of the woods. There are 2 deer hidden apparently. I can see one. I'll attach the photo if you'd like to play.

The tree surgeon hasn't been yet AFAIK. Ixion but the building and selling projects are still alive.

Pity your neighbour is still erratic Cherry 🍒

Doodle Tue 14-Jan-25 22:53:30

Sorry all. Had such a busy day and back late. Catch up tomorrow xx

NotSpaghetti Wed 15-Jan-25 00:12:21

Kaimoana I really feel for you with your family's decision. I left the UK for America taking my parents' only little granddaughter away.

They were so brave and generous and were encouraging for our new life. I suppose I didn't realise then how their hearts must have broken.

We did come back - but I felt my parents' pain for myself when first my son left for America and then again after Brexit when my daughter and family left.

My daughter and family have come back - but my son is gone forever I think.

My parents kept up a lovely relationship with our little daughter who still talks about them a lot. They sent her picture-letters. "Heres Grandpa ironing a shirt, here's Granny slipping on the ice".
It is not over Kaimoana, just changed.💕

Kaimoana2 Wed 15-Jan-25 02:19:50

NotS That final sentence has given me heart, thankyou so very much. ♥♥

Partly my history too when I left my recently-widowed Mum in 1973 to come here with my husband and all his family taking Mum's only grandson. sad

We did go back to UK for a while (no one loved NZ but me and Fil) but eventually I returned with my boys and Mum came out to us shortly afterwards smile

NfkDumpling Wed 15-Jan-25 15:11:16

You live in a beautiful place, Grammaretto. I was just feeling smug as I'd found the dog (well a tail anyway) and then you circled it. What sort of deer is it? It has furry antlers? Makes it look like a little reindeer. I can't spot the other deer though.

And congratulations Naughtyneine. I too will be coming to your celebrations wearing lobster pink. I have the hat already, although it may be best if I sit at the back. It's rather large.

I shall never, ever hear "I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart" again without giggling.

A retired gardener I know who does a bit of gardening for people came round earlier this afternoon with the idea that we'd sort out and move my compost heap. We decided it was too dull and miserable outside so sat and drank coffee and ate cake instead. One of those horrible dark winter's days - which may well influence your family Kaimoana into coming back home. I give them two years at most. Did I get it right that they want to live in North Yorkshire, but he's working in London? That's a long commute.

I used to work for a housing association Doodle, and they had a no pets rule in their flats and sheltered housing. It doesn't make sense to me as so many people on their own would benefit from sharing their home with a pet. (Provided of course, that they're fit enough to look after it properly and have made provision for when/if they can't.) The Powers That Be are always going on about Mental Wellbeing but don't seem to have picked up on the benefits of having a dog or house cat or budgie. Kira, who has admittedly been asleep on her sofa most of the day, has helped me so much through the dark days.

I had no idea that NZ was in such dire straight Kaimoana, that people are having to leave to find work. The BBC, like most of the media now, seems to join the flock of reporters all reporting the same stories. I shall ask Alexa (Christmas present) to find the World Service for me. And cut up some more tee shirts for the rag rug I started making months ago and found while tidying up. Who knows, I may finish by next Christmas.

NotSpaghetti Wed 15-Jan-25 15:19:30

Kaimoana I found some "letters" - lots of scribbles - from my daughter to them not so long ago, they had kept them in a "treasure box". Drawings of the park, her baby brother (born over there) and little thank you notes for sheets of stickers and so on.

Tiny gifts arrived often by post abd were always received with a lot of joy.
I do mean tiny! Water balloons and those draw-on "slates" that you use a stick to make an imprint, fortunetelling fish,tiny kits for finger puppets...

Looking at this i suspect they collected the bits out of the crackers too! And my Mum made some clothes for her baby doll now and again. It was so lovely to feeltheir love from across the seas

Now you can stay in touch with WhatsApp and so on and not have to wait for a very expensive phone call in the middle of the night

Sending love
It really is not over
flowers

Naughtyneine Wed 15-Jan-25 17:14:03

Cheerleader duties.... Nobody mentioned that when I crept into class.... Please tell me it's an optional lesson. Frilly knickers...at a push ...possibly...swirly things that you hold in your hands...yep to them as well...but a tight top and doing a version of a demented can can routine.....nooooo wayyyyy. Apart from the fact that I'd end up with black eyes at the very least....peeps either side would need safety shields too. Gone are the days of pert 34b's and never to be relived again methinks.
Cherry...I remember the toddler walk so well. The day I determindly through gritted teeth took a proper step was wonderful. Next day it was 2..then 5 ..then the whole flight.

We did a registry office wedding last June just to legalise everything just in case. I heard a programme on radio 4 about partners not being entitled to Inheritance tax breaks among other things and wanted to make sure if anything happend to me ( I am 16 years older than DH) he would be protected.

We both want to be married in church. I am Catholic and he became one in 2023. Our previous marriages need to be annulled before we can have a Catholic wedding and that process is going through now. We've decided go ahead and have a celebration on June 28th....it may if the Annulments are through be a nuptial mass or if not a mass and a blessing. We don't want to wait any longer.

All of the above means I will now be doing some form of exercise daily ( for this week anyway). It will be just my luck that I get called for my hip revision op just beforehand and end up going up the aisle on crutches.

Kaimoana... You are obviously a very loving Mother and Grandmother and following the words of the prophet Kahil Kibran to a 'T'.
' Your children are arrows that you fire from your bow......and let your children live the life they want to live not the life that you want them to live'
Not always an easy path to follow especially when love is at the forefront of all you want for them. I know I'm the newest on the block but on any day when you feel down I'm here with the rest of lobsters to carry you through.

Grammaretto...I can't see any deers...unless it's the blobs under the tree on the left. It's probably not but my eyes were doing that thing that was popular years ago when you stared at dots and a picture would appear. I thould I'd spotted Jeeves at one point.

Of course all lobsters will be at my wedding... I'm going to run it past DH about how which he prefers a group of a certain age ladies dressed as lobsters or the same group of ladies in cheerleaders outfits. I've actually just laughed so loudly I've frightened the dogs.

Doodle Wed 15-Jan-25 19:10:27

Ixion I don’t think anyone has got married either. Not too keen on salmon, How about lilac? Could you imagine us all as bridesmaids. What would it be like 🤣
Cherry, I did manage sit fit quite well. Probably because everyone else was around my age or older so not too much was expected. It was very good I will go again
please don’t attempt any spiral staircases or anything thought might cause you a problem. My DILs sister is now out of hospital after her fall and broken hip. She came out today
Oh that made me snigger. The thought of us all dressed as salmon. Would we have dill as headdresses? 🤣
Grammaretto I’m not sure about the dog and as for the deer I’ve no eye deer.
Have you finalised any plans for the build yet? Is your home on the market yet or are you planning on living there while the building work is done?
Notspaghetti what a kind and lovely post to Kaimoana. Must be hard for you with your son so far always too

Doodle Wed 15-Jan-25 19:22:06

*Nfk, I think the problem with flats is that a dog could cause a nuisance with noise that wouldn’t be so bad if it was in a house.
Even if I was allowed a dog I don’t think I’d get one as I’m out and about so much but I would love one to cuddle up with in the evenings. When we had two I used to sit with one either side of me in the chair. Bit of a squash but they always insisted.*
*Naughtyneine I do hope all works out well for you and you are able to walk down the aisle without the aid of crutches.
I don’t think our cheerleading outfits would be suitable for a wedding, certainly not the frilly knickers Ixion wears. *
Dressed as lobsters would prove a focal point but I’m afraid might detract from the bride. Perhaps we could come as Ixion suggested in salmon pink. Big flouncy meringues and diamanté headdresses, can you picture it?

Doodle Wed 15-Jan-25 19:30:17

Kaimoana, I’m at a loss as to what to say. I can’t imagine how hard this will be for you and your son. I’m glad to hear he has a job. That is a positive. I’m assuming it’s a contract one as I doubt he could work in London but live in Yorkshire. Travel costs in London are horrendous.
I do hope his wife sees sense and brings Gubbins to see you. It would be so unfair to deprive you both of a visit
What Notspaghetti wrote is true. You can still be part of their lives and that little girl has grown to love you.
Along with all the gang I’m sending you the biggest cwtch and hand holds and my hopes and prayers will be that you and your son and Gubbins are together again soon.xx

Grammaretto Wed 15-Jan-25 19:40:58

Luckily we have a few months to rehearse Naughtyneine 😂🤣😅
Perhaps both? Lobstar cheer leaders??

Ah you spotted Jeeves in the photo. One of the photos. Well done. I couldn't see him.

I've just got off the phone with a cousin of DH from Australia who is in Edinburgh for a few days.
He suggested I meet him in the City.
I pointed out that I have limited mobility and why didn't he come to me.
He quickly backtracked and decided I was far too far away.
That always amuses me.

However a video call surficed and I told him not to miss the Turner watercolours. They are only on show in January and this year is special as the Turners from Ireland are on loan to Edinburgh. I hope to go myself.

How comforting is your advice to Kaimoana, NotSpag ❤️

What were you so busy doing yesterday Doodle? Intrigued.

Our deer are Roe deer. Nfk 9There are a familyvof 4 who seem to divide their time between my garden, the adjoining woodland, and my neighbour's garden. When they've eaten everything edible at mine they leap over to hers. The babies were actually born under a bush in her garden.
I love those velvet horns!

I have a hospital appointment tomorrow. This for my eye. An assessment for a 2nd cataract op.
Talk about buses all arriving at the same time.

NotSpaghetti Wed 15-Jan-25 19:49:31

My daughter used to rent a flat in Battersea. It was a beautiful (if shabby) mansion house type. For three or four years she shared with someone who worked ("in insurance" I think) for a big City firm. He commuted to London.

His wife and children stayed in Sheffield and he came to London on an early train on Monday - going straight to the office. He came to my daughter's flat late Monday after schmoozing clients and by Friday lunchtime he was gone back home. He was a really lovely man (and an excellent person to share with as he was hardly ever there!)

I think you can find lots of weekday rentals still in London

ixion Thu 16-Jan-25 16:32:52

I hope you negotiated your hospital trip without hitch, Grammaretto and that you get to the Turner exhibition.

Still to see pictures of Doodle's model making?🤔

Always the sensitive post, NotS, in times of need. Thank you.
I hope Kaimoana can take on board the notion of change.
*However, I know she is in a difficult position. Looks like, in DS's inevitable absences, DIL will continue to be the gatekeeper to all contact with Gubbins, and that's not a healthy position to be in and certainly will lack spontaneity on both sides. But, as Doodle says, we will continue to send up prayers that all will be
suitably resolved*. 🤞🤞🤞🤞

Nfk, are you going to open your garden to the public again this year? Do let us know - and keep us posted, please.

A sorting day today, as part of general spring cleaning and decluttering. Children's photos, birth to University effectively. I had a fairly good handle on the various +++ albums until I collected all the identical/similar ones from parents and in-laws after their deaths. It has been an afternoon of nostalgia and not without some irrational sadness.
Crikey. And was I really smiling all the time?
😳

CherryCezzy Thu 16-Jan-25 19:36:55

Kaimoana, when my DB first went abroad to work, (taking my mother's then only grandchild with him) we went to the train station to wave them off. I remember as clearly as if it was yesterday, as train was moving away she was running along the platform chasing the train. He, my SiL and my niece1 were away from the UK for almost three years, only returning once for a short break during that time. My mother thought when they left they had left permanently but it wasn't forever, yes he worked abroad again but his home was in the UK. Your son and Gubbins may yet not end up making the UK their permanent home.

Grammaretto, your January is like my mad 9 days in December. On 11th I broke my toe, on 16th I had my colonoscopy and broke my hip and on 20th I had my partial hip replacement. I think I read that your appointment today was at somewhere you haven't been before, I hope you didn't get lost and the appointment went well 🤞.

What a lovely find, NotSpaghetti. Treasure boxes are fascinating I think, some would say they are unnecessary and 'clutter' but they tell us what and who is indispensable to their keeper revealing special bonds. My niece1 was astonished to find, after her death, her mother (my SiL) had a treasure box at all because my SiL was a practical woman who disliked clutter. For the last 18 years she has kept it safe.

I'm pleased you got on well at the sit fit, Doodle and that you enjoyed it and will go agy. The physio is referring me on to an exercise class (run by physios), I've no idea yet when it will start though.

Crikey ixion, is it Spring already 😬. We've got so much spring cleaning and decluttering to do we'd better get a move on that even if we started now it'll be summer before it's finished 🤭.
Nothing like photos for a trip down memory lane 💐

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