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(1001 Posts)
NotSpaghetti Thu 01-May-25 17:40:57

It began as group support during difficult times and although Covid has faded a little, the friendship has endured and become stronger.

Still here for anyone to join a non-judgemental, caring thread during the often challenging time in life.

I'm a newbie - found friends after lockdown. Grateful to them for being so warm.

NotSpaghetti Wed 25-Jun-25 21:55:33

Oh Doodle I hope your dark hole slowly fills with light as you get some sensible use back in your hand.
You have had a string of horrid things and now and it's time you had something good happen.
πŸ™

NotSpaghetti Wed 25-Jun-25 21:51:06

I did go home for an hour today as I had a Spirometry test and then needed to return some things for my mother-in-law and buy her some more flannels.
I stopped off to pick up a change of clothes and just wept for 15 minutes.

The fridge was a mess and full of things that needed eating so that was a problem. The garden was desperate for a drink and the house was in the same chaos it's been in for the last six weeks... even my lovely robot hoover wanted attention! It wanted a new bag but having gone up to the top of the house leaving the new bag downstairs I'm afraid I just shook the old one and put it back telling it it was a new one!

I think I'm OK now though.

NotSpaghetti Wed 25-Jun-25 21:41:10

Yes he is, Grammaretto. Only 40 mins away - but as we are now holed up nearly 24/7 at my mother-in-law's house I sent his gift via my son who is seeing his sister and her boys today.

We had a little video of him cutting his "Collosseum cake" which was apparently a last minute invention.... and then another where he's "demanding" ice cream in an outrageously ridiculous voice.
Teenage boys are quite something arent they! grin

I love that he is kind and gentle - as well as silly! ❀️

Grammaretto Wed 25-Jun-25 21:23:45

Happy birthday both our boys NotSpag.
I hope to see mine on Friday. Is yours local?

Thanks all for the reassurance about the house. I am reassured!

Grammaretto Wed 25-Jun-25 21:21:47

I wish we could coax you out of that dark hole Doodle
πŸ•³ πŸ•³ πŸ•³
🌈 πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ 🌈 πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ 🌈 πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ
🌞 β˜€οΈ 🌀

When is your next appointment?

Doodle Wed 25-Jun-25 19:57:02

Many happy returns to the birthday boys.
Stick to your guns Grammaretto and hold out for what you want in the way of a new home. Sometimes these things take an age.
Kaimoana of course things must be so hard for you. I’m glad you have someone to take you to things but difficult for you o know what’s going on all the time.
Ixion no physio till my hand has been signed off by the orthopaedic team. I do have movement exercises to do which I am working on.
I seem to have slid into a dark hole at the moment. Hopefully I will talk myself out of it soon. Take care all xx

NotSpaghetti Wed 25-Jun-25 13:50:03

PS - it's my second grandson's birthday today too.
πŸŽ‚

NotSpaghetti Wed 25-Jun-25 13:48:23

Grammaretto we had a deposit on a house in Southern Ireland many years ago.
It was 5% of the purchase price and sat there for eight years.
That was even harder to explain.

But, Grammaretto, if you really want something and it truly speaks to your heart, then another month then another 3 months then a further 3 months is all very logical as we make the best decisions we can based on the information we have at the time.
For years it all seemed to still be the best option...
It was always the best option in my heart - and then one day it just wasn't.

I would probably never have worked in refuges or homeless hostels or with people recovering ftom drugs/alcohol or with ex-offenders or in family support if I'd gone to Ireland.
Someone, when I was feeling disappointed about what my life might have been like once told me I was needed here. It was such a lovely thing to say and helped a lot.

Grammaretto Wed 25-Jun-25 13:30:04

I've stopped discussing my house plans. It's becoming embarrassing as it's so slow. I'm getting used to people asking me why I'm still here!
I may re-let the flat short term to
keep paying the bills.

I hope you are having some better times in between the bad days Doodle

My dgs is 18 today. It seems only yesterday we were pushing him in his pram...... I do worry sometimes about what the future holds for these youngsters just setting out.

I wish the seagull chick would hurry up and learn to fly. I want my garden back.

Grammaretto Wed 25-Jun-25 13:21:35

Any news from England, Kaimoana?

Kaimoana2 Tue 24-Jun-25 22:07:14

Not stupid at all ixion but I don't have a garden and Kumerahou is temperamental, must have a certain kind of soil and wouldn't thrive in a pot or I'd have been growing it already grin



I've bought some from an online source where they say the appropriate karakia/prayers and gather it from the bush.

Doodle said, "Difficult to keep up with what’s going on if you can’t see properly,"

You never said a truer word. Sometimes I feel very much on the margins of the community. I'm lucky to have a good lady who takes me to the elders group and homecare to buy vegetables for me.

ixion Tue 24-Jun-25 21:06:08

Grammaretto I think your seagull is really cute! I am intrigued to hear how the writer's book on your house has turned out. Surely you should get a free signed copy!

Kaimoana No sniggering at the back there, please, but would it not be possible to source a Kumerahou bush via an online nursery? It could be delivered to your door and I am sure there would be someone who could dig it in for you (or into a tub maybe?).
Can Jeeves multi-task? Now there's a silly question.
Then you could pick leaves fresh as you need them.

Or is that too stupid of me?

Are you having physio for your fingers, Doodle?
I do hope you are making some progress.

Poor NS - I do know a little of how you are feeling. I used to say that either the physical or the emotional stress by themselves would be do-able, but heap the two together and life can be seemingly insurmountable. πŸ’

Thinking of NN and hoping everything goes well and you have a truly magical day.

Doodle Tue 24-Jun-25 20:59:43

Evening all. Not the best of days today for some reason. Did manage to get my hair done. Hoping I’ll be able to do it myself soon. Church tomorrow thank goodness.
Grammaretto i like your new friend. Hopefully he will be able to fly soon.
Sorry about the huge head. Difficult to keep up with what’s going on if you can’t see properly,

Grammaretto Tue 24-Jun-25 20:35:54

NotSpag how could you! πŸ€£πŸ˜‚ Well they are devoted and I can't go anywhere near for fear of being dive bombed.

NotSpaghetti Tue 24-Jun-25 14:35:20

Grammaretto your seagull chick is a baby that only a parent could truly love! grin

Grammaretto Tue 24-Jun-25 12:30:17

I'm glad you have Mepa to keep an eye on you Kaimoana she sounds lovely 😍
As do the purple slippers.

Sorry NotSpag that life for DMiL continues to be difficult and that you are so weary.

Amazing that she can chat with her old friend 🧑.

I'm being really lazy today and enjoying doing nothing apart from watching an interesting film documentary, recommended by DS3, called Shifty about Britain in the late 20th century. It's on iplayer.

This afternoon there are some events I should go to. A public consultation at the Town Hall about the future of the building. I get dΓ©ja vu at these things. I'm sure I have made all the comments I can. The council will do what they want in the end, to save money.

Cynic? Moi?

There's a book launch tonight at the library. A local woman author who says she wrote the thriller? about my house. I can't imagine what it will be like. Will I be expected to buy a copy!

The concert last night was really good. The only thing spoiling it a bit for me was a huge head in front of me and that my df who sings in one of the four choirs was hidden behind the piano.

My seagull chick is fairly growing up so I presume the scary parents are feeding it. It's moved along to underneath a rose.

NotSpaghetti Mon 23-Jun-25 14:32:38

Doodle, I'm sure things will settle soon.
It's unfortunately such a shock when you know nothing and the services are so separate from each other and don't speak to each other.

My mother-in-law has three times submitted a signed letter to the surgery to allow them to talk to my husband.
They say they don't have anything on record!
🀬

I suppose getting her ducks in a row takes rather more effort than herding cats...

She has just however made a phone call to her dear friend who she met as a teen and "grew up" with and who is a few years her senior. It was a small joy and blessing to eavesdrop on their jolly chat.
What a precious thing a friendship is.

❀️

Doodle Mon 23-Jun-25 13:12:26

Grammaretto. Hope you enjoy the exercise class and your concert tonight,

Doodle Mon 23-Jun-25 13:04:53

Kaimoana Mepa sounds a really good person. I wonder why purple slippers are so popular, it was DHs favourite colour.
Notspaghetti I’m so sorry things are so stressful for you all. It seems in the NHS everyone thinks someone else is sorting things out. Hope your MiL is more settled soon.

NotSpaghetti Mon 23-Jun-25 07:49:03

How lovely to have someone caring like Mepa, Kaimoana

I hope we can somehow sort out a Mepa to help us with my mother-in-law. πŸ™

The mess that was hospital discharge for her needs serious reform as we are (all three of us) totally rung out since she came home 2 days ago.

My brain tells me that it will get easier as routines are established but my body is SO weak and struggling.

Not looking for sympathy as I know many of you have been through this (and worse).
I know my husband is also "wrung out" but I won't complain to him (I know i don’t need to anyway!) as is is his mum I think he feels guilty that we are suddenly in a big exhausting mess.

Kaimoana2 Mon 23-Jun-25 07:16:41

A few mundane lines from Fortress Finn.

Cold but sunny. sunshine Don't mind the former if we have the latter sunshine

I have several orders for Marae Slippers, all of them in purple ! smile.

When I'm just knitting, as a hobby/pastime, with no one in mind, it's a leisurely job but how different when you know someone is waiting hmm

We are past the Shortest Day now and even if the temperatures can (and will) get much lower over the next two months, psychologically, it feels as if Spring is coming nearer every day.

I've told you about Mepa, my lovely homecare lady.
Last Friday was a public holiday for the Matariki celebrations and the agency said they would send someone Thursday instead, to change my bed.
It didn't happen.

So I didn't expect Mepa to come on Friday but she did and it coincided with me being in the shower so I didn't hear the bell. She could see from the gardeen I wasn't in my chair and at the french windows were open, I wasn't out either.

She was so worried about me she came back at 6pm, to make sure I was all right. She's such a love.

And I am a lucky wumman. grin

Doodle Sun 22-Jun-25 21:39:13

Grammaretto that’s a nice idea for the birthday celebration.
Our sons and my BIL and SIL all met up at the hospice today and had another toast to Dh. I like him being remembered.

I love your little tree,
Church this morning. It was even warm in there . Much cooler tonight so hope all sleep well

Grammaretto Sat 21-Jun-25 21:03:27

Ofcourse Doodle. So sad when the birthdays come round. It would have been DH big birthday next month. I have decided to invite a few friends round plus any of the family who can make it.

This long day, still quite light. I went to a summer fair and a matinΓ©e at the theatre. The fair was lovely, the play a bit hard for me to understand. It was Martin Luther King's last day .

While I was away, a kind friend put up a support for my little oak tree which the pesky deer keep nibbling. It looks as though it's in prison but I tell it it's for your own good πŸ˜…πŸ˜‚

Doodle Sat 21-Jun-25 20:39:59

Kaimoana my wrists aren’t so bad it’s the finger movements typing that cause the most pain.
They say you should avoid typing a lot as it can cause tendon problems. My wrists do ache though.
Today would be DH’s birthday. Been quite sad but had a zoom call with both sons which was nice.
Hope all are well xx

Kaimoana2 Sat 21-Jun-25 00:10:31

I hope you're singing the Happy Wanderer as you stride, Doodle grin

I cannot imagine a nicer day than pottery and pals Grammaretto smile

The Saga of Kumerahou has ended with my buying it online after all. The young lady who was going to bring me some did so but a tiny bottle which yielded lesws than 2 glasses. To be effective, I need that every day for 2-3 weeks.
I realised I was probably being unfair to expect anyone to provide what I could buy if desperate - so I squandered part of my 'winter heating supplement' on it.
grin

Doodle I do hope your wrists are feeling less painful. I know wrists are slow to heal because of all the little bones.

We are fearfully and wonderfully made, as the psalmist said.

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